Haven't left my house in 8 months..? |
Haven't left my house in 8 months..? |
Feb 25 2009, 10:37 AM
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#1
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don't call me shirley. Group: Member Posts: 193 Joined: Oct 2008 Member No: 689,028 |
I'm Agoraphobic, I've been diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder since I was 10.
For the first 4 months in high school, people thought I was a mute. Yeah, i know. I'm very quiet. I wouldn't yell even if I was on fire. My mom was extremely a depressed person, so I think this was genetic. During elementary school, it was very hard. That's when the bullying began, in the 3rd grade. It hasn't stopped since I turned senior in high school. I graduated in June 2008, since July 1st, I haven't left my house. I start college in Fall 2009, I'm considering taking it online. I just can't be around people. I can't even breathe in a supermarket. My brother tried to take me Christmas shopping last December, & it was too much people, passing towards me, touching me, looking at me, I just started having slow panic attacks & ran into the car, & just bursted in tears. I can't live like this. I can't even get across a room full of people. I always have to wait for hours for them to leave, so I can get my bottled water in the vending machine. My dad thinks it's stupidity, not extreme shyness. So is there any advice anyone can give me? Should i go out, take it slow? Geez, I can't even do THAT, I always duck when a car passes by. |
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Feb 25 2009, 10:44 AM
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#2
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 6,349 Joined: Aug 2006 Member No: 455,274 |
Gaze at the direction you're going and ignore everything around you. In other words, focus on a target. Say you're walking to the vending machine, focus your eyes only on the vending machine as you approach it. Don't look around, otherwise you'll think people are talking about you or lookin at you.
Sucks you had to deal with bullies... I use to help kids who couldn't fend for themselves in Middle School and High School. =\ |
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Feb 25 2009, 10:45 AM
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#3
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Melieized Group: Official Designer Posts: 1,372 Joined: Nov 2006 Member No: 478,715 |
have you spoken to a doctor about this? you might want to look into seeing someone, like a therapist.
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Feb 25 2009, 03:55 PM
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#4
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/人◕‿‿◕人\ Group: Official Member Posts: 8,283 Joined: Dec 2007 Member No: 602,927 |
People in my school still think I'm a mute.
Less than 15 people in my school have heard me talk. Those who have heard me talk, have only heard me say yes and no. |
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Feb 25 2009, 04:18 PM
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#5
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Senior Member Group: Official Designer Posts: 5,880 Joined: Nov 2007 Member No: 593,382 |
I was the opposite for a long time. I was very insecure did stupid things to draw attention to myself. I stopped when i was 10 and im 13 now. Are you nervous talking to your dad or brother at home? Why are you nervous talking others? Im sure you have had lots of time with your thoughts so why dont you just convince yourself to get out there. You can still be insecure, and be scared about what people think but you need to get to the point where you can care about what people think actually in front of them. Not just wondering what they may think.
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Feb 25 2009, 04:19 PM
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#6
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Senior Member Group: Administrator Posts: 2,648 Joined: Apr 2008 Member No: 639,265 |
I think you first have to analyze why you scared. When you feel anxious about going out, stop and think about why you're anxious. Maybe even writing/journaling about your thoughts and feelings can help you investigate the cause. I think problems are much easier to face when you understand them.
Once you understand your fears, you can begin to address them. You'll probably realize there's nothing at all to be scared about, and then you can start to face your fear. Going slow at first is probably the best route. I understand how you feel, though. I'm extremely acrophobic, and it's still hard for me to go anywhere high -- even climbing a ladder freaks me out. But if you take baby steps, you can slowly overcome it. |
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Feb 25 2009, 04:22 PM
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#7
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poison Group: Official Member Posts: 4,806 Joined: Mar 2008 Member No: 629,020 |
Take small steps, I would try talking maybe on the phone with some people, then maybe go out with a family member or a friend to a small no so populated place. Then bring more people each time you go out but make sure you know them so you can get use to being with a lot of people.
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Feb 25 2009, 04:48 PM
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#8
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 1,938 Joined: Jul 2008 Member No: 667,832 |
Basically what Tomates said, start small. It's better taking your time with it.
I heard about a hypnotist that will hypnotize(wrong spelling i assume) a person and gives them an object and a certain colour to think about(ex a blue rbberband), so when they think they'll have a panic attack they can just look that that object and it relaxes them |
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*BOSS* |
Feb 25 2009, 05:26 PM
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#9
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Guest |
This is just my opinion, but im guessing exposure therapy would be the best bet, like the others said, start small. Perhaps, meet one new person and just chit chat, hopefully as you progress, your fear would lessen if not completely dissolve. This issue isn't a cake walk either, so if you ever feel to anxious, its ok just to leave, a quick bye would be fine.
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Feb 25 2009, 06:09 PM
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#10
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Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,019 Joined: May 2008 Member No: 653,768 |
Basically what Tomates said, start small. It's better taking your time with it. I heard about a hypnotist that will hypnotize(wrong spelling i assume) a person and gives them an object and a certain colour to think about(ex a blue rbberband), so when they think they'll have a panic attack they can just look that that object and it relaxes them does shanaynay use a blue pill? is that why you brought up a blue rbberband? |
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Feb 25 2009, 06:15 PM
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#11
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Photoartist Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 12,363 Joined: Apr 2006 Member No: 399,390 |
other posters brought up good points; I wanna say, if you can survive cB, you can survive some in-person contact
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Feb 25 2009, 06:16 PM
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#12
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٩(͡๏̯͡๏)۶ Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,309 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 65,593 |
You say this is genetic? No way. it's definitely a social factor.
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Feb 25 2009, 06:17 PM
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#13
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Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,019 Joined: May 2008 Member No: 653,768 |
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Feb 25 2009, 06:39 PM
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#14
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Melieized Group: Official Designer Posts: 1,372 Joined: Nov 2006 Member No: 478,715 |
^lol
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Feb 25 2009, 06:48 PM
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#15
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DDR \\ I'm Dee :) Group: Mentor Posts: 8,662 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 384,020 |
One step at a time. I have horrible anxiety, but trying to figure out how things will be in the coming years and weeks only make it worse. There's probably a lot of places that you don't like to go, so don't start out on a large scale. Find something that comforts you... or someone, like a family member. Let it (or the person) be a distraction for you when you go out. For starters, just think about why you're there and focus on that instead of the people. Some people might not like it that you're not talking to them, but don't worry about it. I think it would be good for you to be in a classroom setting at college rather than an online course. If you take courses online you're only giving into the anxiety of going out and talking to people instead of confronting it. College is a lot different than high school... if you're in class and feeling overwhelmed, step out for a couple of minutes. It'd probably be a good idea to let your college know about this, because they will be able to better accommodate you.
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*BOSS* |
Feb 26 2009, 12:24 AM
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#16
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Guest |
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Mar 9 2009, 02:49 PM
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#17
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Kimberly Group: Member Posts: 1,961 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 121,599 |
I'm sorry you've had such a hard time dealing with your anxiety. My experiences have been much more milder than yours, but I was diagnosed with social anxiety about a year and a half ago. I was put on Zoloft, and it has made things a million times better.
I would get very anxious too just going to the grocery store, and I was a loner in school. Once I was diagnosed and got treatment, I was finally able to switch from a small private school to public school for my senior year, and was perfectly fine with the switch. I was finally not scared to learn to drive, and now I'm in my second semester of college. Therapy might work too, but that's what helped me. |
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Apr 12 2009, 02:13 PM
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#18
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moo i'm a cow, mate Group: Member Posts: 56 Joined: Dec 2008 Member No: 704,304 |
first of all, i must say you're doing very well.
i feel sorry that you seem to have nobody who will genuinely support you and it also seems like you don't know who/what to trust anymore set yourself very small goals each day, don't ever be scared of failure like i was, because you can learn from them and pick yourself up and try again. good luck. |
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