life's unanswered questions, ... Options

[piney]

Life's unanswered questions. this really makes sense!!

Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same
as the words "the" and "rapist" put together?

~Don't you find it worrying that doctors call treating
you their "practice" ?

~ Why do bullies always ask "what¡¯s your problem"
when they're obviously not going to solve it?

~When people say, "I¡¯m so tired it's not even funny"
or "my head hurts so much it's not even funny", why
would it even be funny in the first place?

~ "Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a
compliment? Since when are buttons cute?

~ Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,
"I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and
drink what comes out"?

~ Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken
over there ... I'm gonna eat the first thing that
comes out if its butt"?

~If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
come from morons?

~ Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet
soup?

~ Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking
space but its ok to use a handicapped toilet?

~Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the
packaging it becomes extra tempting to eat?

~Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable
but not on regular television? Don't they want the
people without cable to buy the cable?

~ Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of
the words 'poli' meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics'
as in 'bloodsucking creatures¡¯?

~If a fork were made of gold would it still be
considered silverware?

~If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold?

~If scientists were ever going to figure out how to
travel through time, wouldn¡¯t we now be seeing people
from the future?

~Do pyromaniacs wear blazers?

~Why do they call the small candy bars the "fun
sizes"? Wouldn't be more fun to
eat a big one?

~Why do we teach kids that violence is not the answer
and then have them read about wars in school that
solved America's problems?

~why when some one mocks your religion and you kill
them your sent to jail but if a country mocks your
religion and you kill a lot of people over it your
considered a hero?

~How important does a person have to be before they
are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

~Just what was the "Baby On Board" sign for? Did it
help us decide which car not to
hit in case of an accident?

~If your name is Mr. Crunch, and you joined the Navy,
would you eventually be Captain Crunch?

~364 days of the year, parents tell their kids not to
take candy from
strangers, yet on Halloween, its encouraged! Why is
that ?

~Why is it when we laugh in school the teachers say do
you find something funny? When obviously we do?

~If lava melts rock, wouldn¡¯t the lava melt the
volcano?

~If a man has no fingers, can he press charges?

~Does it really count in court when an atheist is
sworn in under oath using a Bible?

~Why isn't the word 'gullible' in the dictionary?

~Why do people who don¡¯t want to go to hell bury
themselves 6 ft. closer?

~What do you say when someone says you're in denial,
but you're not?

~Have you ever thought what life would be like if your
name was Anonymous? You'd get credit for everything
nobody wanted credit for?

~Can a hearse driver drive a corpse in the Car Pool
lane?

~Why is the name of the phobia for the fear of long
words Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia?

~If Dracula has no reflection, how comes he always had
such a straight parting in his hair?

~Why do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to
the back of the store to get their prescriptions while
healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?

~Why does mineral water that has "trickled through
mountains for centuries" go out of date next year?

~Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
toast to a horrible crisp which no decent human being
would eat?

~Why do people point to their wrist when asking for
the time, but people don't point to their crotch when
they ask where the bathroom is?

~If Practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, then
why practice?

~If a robber tried to rob a dance club and yelled,
"Everybody get down", would all the people start
dancing?

hehe

[xenosaga]

these are really funny, they really are life's unanswered questions