passion Options

[xTINAA]

Well for an assignment in my TOK class we had to write a poem about something we're passionate about and how we lose ourself in it like getting lost in reading your favorite book or while listening to music. Anyway, I'm really passionate about church and it's easy to lose yourself in it and forget about time and everything around you. So I wrote a 20 line couplet poem about it. It's not too great but I would like a lot of constructive criticism please.

Such a boundless enthusiasm takes over me
And enwraps me with complete glee
I hear the band play with such zeal
The words kiss my ear and all seems surreal
I find myself singing loudly
Proclaiming I love God proudly
My hands rise up to the sky
Blissful tears I start to cry
Emotion takes full control
Then I consider myself whole
Whispered prayers can be heard
In a mesh of noise that sounds absurd
I’m taken with all of this elation
That I lose track and have a revelation
This all started at night
But soon, together, we reached a height
Where all of the distractions were gone
We all became entwined as one
And as the sun started to rise
I then began to open my eyes

It might also not make sense haha but oh well.