Help Her Up |
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 May 26 2005, 06:29 PM
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#1
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 The Best Thing Since Instant Soup  Group: Member Posts: 815 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 104,928  |
I made a little poem/story.. It's kinda real, except for a certain part. This is old, I just haven't shown it to anybody... We're talking Sixth Grade old.. I'm surprised I even found it..
__________________________________ ____ ___ __ _ Every Day, I see her. She Makes me. Smile. She Makes me. Debate. She Makes me. Laugh. She Makes Me Wonder. Especially when she dances. She doesn't know how to dance. But I don't tell her that. It's not like me, to be the kind to break an innocent perception. But I keep things to myself. When She Rides her Bike. I watch. When She Rides her Bike. I watch. Again. When She Rides her Bike, and Falls Off, I watch, and laugh. But Then Think.. Why does she fall, if she has been on a bike since she was a kid? I guess it's weird. So.. I still watch her. I'm developing something. For Her, Of Course... But Why? And Why Am I So Quiet About it? I can't talk to her about it... As if she were my friend... Anyway. I'll just watch and watch, to my heart's content. I'm looking for that night. Which night? The night to tell her how I feel. Not The Day I see Her, But The Night. The Night I see Her. That's when she'll know. And Everytime she might fall off that bike.. I'll be there to help her up. __________________________________ ____ ___ __ _ PLEASE Comment.. Nobody EVER does.. |
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May 26 2005, 08:54 PM
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#2
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 iuvenesco Group: Member Posts: 427 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 101,221 |
Hey, not bad at all for sixth grade. It's cute, but I'm not really feeling the choppy sentence structure. But all in all, its nice =)
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May 26 2005, 09:51 PM
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#3
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 High Voltage!∞ Group: Official Member Posts: 4,728 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 29,157 |
Lol good for sixth grade. Haha I liked it. It was oddly funny & cute.
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May 28 2005, 01:18 PM
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#4
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The Best Thing Since Instant Soup Group: Member Posts: 815 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 104,928 |
Thanks... It was actually based a *little* on someone I knew.
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May 30 2005, 10:19 PM
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#5
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 What a hypocrite. Group: Member Posts: 2,754 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 128,150 |
It's a wonderful poem, even though it was written in sixth grade. =]
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Jun 4 2005, 02:16 AM
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#6
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 deleted Group: Member Posts: 3,168 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,276 |
wow. you had great talent even in sixth grade. =)
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Jun 4 2005, 01:37 PM
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#7
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 52 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 133,454 |
yes you should try writing one now :)
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Jun 4 2005, 01:40 PM
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#8
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 No Day But Today. Group: Member Posts: 1,405 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 99,184 |
Good job, especially for 6th grade! :D It's cute
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Jun 4 2005, 05:24 PM
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#9
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 I'll never be who I was again.. Group: Member Posts: 2,886 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 77,981 |
awww..the poem is so cute!lol..
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| *Kathleen* |
Jun 6 2005, 01:01 PM
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#10
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Guest |
Haha that really sums up sixth grade crushes. Or at least, the nature of middle school crushes. It was cute.
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