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disappointments
xj_liana_tx
post Mar 5 2005, 05:49 PM
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my life is just full of disappointments, it's like some people (like god) is playing a joke on me. i try to be content and think positive, but it's just so hard to do, especially right now. two of the most important events of the year were yesterday and today. yesterday was our NFL(national forensics league) districts, and i've been looking forward to it ever since i found out about it. i've been practicing ever since and i started to pray for myself to go to nationals and to prove myself to others (especially my parents). I was at my rounds and i did my best, i thought that i would AT LEAST get into semi-finals. But when they posted the results for yesterday, i got eliminated right after the preliminary rounds... i just stood there in disbelief.. i mean.. i've made it to FINALS in EVERY SINGLE TOURNAMENT! And the people who usually didn't make the prelim made it to the next round while i was one of the few who got ELIMINATED. I mean.. i just stood there.. i was sweating and i felt like crying really bad, but i had to hold it. I just don't get it... the people in my rounds.. BROKE THE RULES of the event big time, and they were still in. it's just... so not fair (yes.. life is not fair blah blah blah)! So i went home, and i called my best friend, and i cried for a full hour till my phone was all wet and she was being supportive. I had to sleep in the dark by myself because my parents weren't back. The next morning, i got up and felt a little bit better, until... that is, my parents asked me about how it went. i told them and i started to cry again, and my parents were just being really unsympathetic. my dad was just going "Well you can't blame anyone except for yourself because i never saw you practice... see that's why i tell you to memorize the sat vocabs so you don't cry when you take the sats... you have really low emotional IQ, how can you cry at something like this? You can't take on anything.. how do you expect to be a leader if you cry over something so little?" and just things along these lines.. i mean, i started to cry more after it, because these are the LAST thing i need at the moment. and... little?? how can you call something little when i spent so much time working on and stressing about for the past 2 months? Something that i really want, i really want it that i am willing to sacrifice things for? So i also had my solo/ensemble festival (music competition) today, and i thought if i make it to state in that, i might feel better. I got there, and we played, i did my best, but my partners got some notes wrong, so i was praying for the judge to have mercy on us. then i got the result.. we got a 2 (the best score was 1, you need a 1 to go to state), and... suddenly, i just felt like crying again because .... the two things i really cared about just... they were gone... just like that... and now all i have is my homework and some tests coming up. i can't even concentrate.
i don't think that i've ever been so disappointed in my life.

well, that's my biggest disappointments..
what are yours?
 

Posts in this topic
xj_liana_tx   disappointments   Mar 5 2005, 05:49 PM
EmmalieV   wow but all the guys ive been with are dissapointm...   Mar 5 2005, 05:53 PM
tweeak   right now, not being able to do ib not my biggest...   Mar 5 2005, 05:55 PM
Kathleen   Aww. NFL quals are around this time, too. Are you ...   Mar 5 2005, 06:02 PM
xj_liana_tx   QUOTE(Kathleen @ Mar 5 2005, 6:02 PM)Aww. NFL...   Mar 5 2005, 06:17 PM
salcha   wow, i hope you feel better :/ i know, my biggest ...   Mar 5 2005, 06:04 PM
sheddingtears   i'm disappointed in myself for being lazy ...   Mar 5 2005, 06:05 PM
dancingkait   my disappointment for the moment is not making fir...   Mar 5 2005, 06:06 PM
njgurl412   my biggest disappointment was not getting accepted...   Mar 5 2005, 06:10 PM
Just_Dream   Life's not perfect. There will always be disap...   Mar 5 2005, 06:11 PM
Kathleen   QUOTEi used to do LD but then i quit because i don...   Mar 5 2005, 07:08 PM
Nicolatofu   Sorry to hear about you not winning in what you tr...   Mar 5 2005, 07:54 PM
jooleeah   I get really disappointed when I can't achieve...   Mar 5 2005, 09:21 PM
x_angawhomps   I'm waiting for Anna to say something like.. ...   Mar 5 2005, 09:42 PM
Spiritual Winged Aura   Why does your dad act like an ass ? What kind of f...   Mar 5 2005, 10:48 PM
xj_liana_tx   QUOTE(aznxboredxperson @ Mar 5 2005, 10:48 PM...   Mar 5 2005, 11:04 PM
Spiritual Winged Aura   QUOTE(xj_liana_tx @ Mar 5 2005, 8:04 PM)i am ...   Mar 6 2005, 03:59 AM
krnxswat   And that's why your posts per day is 20.7.   Mar 5 2005, 10:52 PM
Spiritual Winged Aura   QUOTE(krnxswat @ Mar 5 2005, 7:52 PM)And that...   Mar 5 2005, 11:02 PM
yukichan   sorry to hear about that...=( i cant believe that ...   Mar 5 2005, 10:55 PM
krnxswat   RE: disappointments   Mar 5 2005, 10:58 PM
avalon*   well my biggest disappointment this school year wa...   Mar 5 2005, 11:00 PM
stephinika   yeah i've had my fair share of disappointments...   Mar 6 2005, 01:18 AM
waccoon   God. This was a long thread D:. +pretends to have...   Mar 6 2005, 08:27 AM
xcaitlinx   lately--ive been crushing HARD on this kid. and i ...   Mar 6 2005, 10:33 AM
rOckThISshYt   Wow.. I'm really sorry to hear that. Your dad ...   Mar 6 2005, 12:53 PM
kaleidoscoped   oh man. so there was this guy and i THOUGHT we ha...   Mar 6 2005, 12:59 PM
xj_liana_tx   QUOTE(aznxboredxperson @ Mar 6 2005, 3:59 AM)...   Mar 6 2005, 02:18 PM
Brneydgrl   it does sound like your parents are being harsh on...   Mar 7 2005, 10:52 AM
starlette   I'm sorry about ur comp. I know that sucks. ...   Mar 7 2005, 11:05 AM
xj_liana_tx   QUOTE(Brneydgrl @ Mar 7 2005, 10:52 AM)as for...   Mar 7 2005, 06:05 PM
Azarel   Ew. Self-pitious prick. Disappointments? Him.   Mar 8 2005, 02:32 AM
PAULiNE_x   QUOTE(Azarel @ Mar 8 2005, 2:32 AM)Ew. Self-p...   Mar 8 2005, 04:23 AM
angel-roh   Wow Jay that's so much pain and anger! Hm....   Mar 8 2005, 04:23 AM
xj_liana_tx   QUOTE(angel-roh @ Mar 8 2005, 4:23 AM)Wo...   Mar 8 2005, 09:28 PM
perfectxflaw23   -Dropping out of ballet, gymnastics, field hockey,...   Mar 8 2005, 06:45 AM
DavidJ2318   QUOTE(perfectxflaw23 @ Mar 8 2005, 5:45 AM)-D...   Mar 8 2005, 12:43 PM
krispy_kreme333   i know how it feels to have all the pressure, im a...   Mar 8 2005, 01:15 PM
instantmusic   im disapointed because i still dont have the 2 thi...   Mar 8 2005, 11:53 PM


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