Signs |
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Signs |
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#1
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![]() Bardic Nation ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,113 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,059 ![]() |
Signs
Looking to the sky- naught in searching right- finding nothing without light- passing blind and no such sign- Desciduating flames and plight- nomadic in nature and in night- following the stars as a map- never content drinking as a dogs lap- centering the largest with a scope- defining the past with a single note- Pestering the nerves of the elder- the gauge is rising as it begins to swellter- hidden among the greens is another- wraith of faith dividing the lovers- wintery stones pass through the furnace- gasping underneath and never reach- the surface- |
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*tyedyefroggy* |
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#2
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I give it a 6
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#3
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![]() oh sweet pestilence ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 2,251 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 22,876 ![]() |
I give it an 8, the only part i didn't like was the last three lines
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#4
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Brie ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 10,172 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,548 ![]() |
Hm.
6.5 - 7. I don't especially like the last 3 lines either, but other than that.. it's nice. =) |
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#5
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![]() Bardic Nation ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,113 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,059 ![]() |
those were my three favorite lines.. but i think what it is, is that i started another poem inside this one
so i should probably take those out |
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#6
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![]() consistently inconsistent. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 509 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 74,128 ![]() |
I liked it! I give it a 9
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#7
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![]() my <3 is in Ohio ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 899 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 27,599 ![]() |
i'd give it a 7. good work though
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#8
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![]() Bardic Nation ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,113 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,059 ![]() |
so what other than those three lines it's perfect? someone say something to make it sound not perfect
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