I'm really scared, I'm afraid of my boyfriend |
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 Oct 24 2004, 05:25 PM
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#1
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Member  Group: Member Posts: 15 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,325  |
My boyfriend lives like 30 minutes away from me. We started going out like 5 months ago. The first month was great he was really cool and nice. Then all of a sudden he was slitting his wrists and smoking. I knew that he was gothic and punk and stuff but he was just acting way too evil, though I am not implying that goths and punks are evil. Anyway, then his friends started talking to me and telling me that he's a "pothead". I thought they were just trying to make me break up with him. So I ignored them. Then one day we were all hangning out and he was wearing a black t-shirt and I could see the scars on his arms. It really scared me. And then he asked me if I wanted to smoke some pot. I said "No" and he got all mad and started saying that I just didn't like him and then he tried to hit me but I knew that he was going to so i moved back and he started yeeling and then his sister came downstairs and talked to him and I left. Now all of his friends and he are telling me how sorry he is and that he'll never do it again. But I know that sometimes people say that but it always happens again. But I really truly like him and I want to see him get better. But if I reject him I'm afraid he's going to continue cutting himself and be very hurt. Please give whatever helpful advice you have!!!
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Oct 24 2004, 05:28 PM
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#2
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 wanderlust personified. Group: Official Designer Posts: 7,515 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 797 |
Wrong forum hun.
Topic Moved |
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Oct 24 2004, 05:29 PM
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#3
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POWAPOSTA Group: Member Posts: 3,169 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 30,725 |
leave him
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Oct 24 2004, 05:33 PM
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#4
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Member Group: Member Posts: 15 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,325 |
oops-ee-doodles! ugh. i hate putting things in wrong forums!!!
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Oct 24 2004, 05:36 PM
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#5
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I love you <33333 Group: Member Posts: 2,928 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 30,404 |
ok, if a guy is going to treat u like that,hes not worth having u. i would leave him.i know it's gonna be hard,but thats waht i would do. if he starts stalking/hitting u, u might wanna get a restraining order or something.just because he says he's sorry & he wont do it again,doesnt mean he's not going to. you've most likely read stories about stuff like this,how the boyfriend hits the g/f and says he wont do it again,and then does it again. just remeber that if u stay with him, your risking your life.
Edit:: o yea and if ur worried about ur b/f then maybe you should talk to a counselor or something and tell them that he's cutting and that may help him with that. |
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Oct 24 2004, 05:51 PM
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#6
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 5,585 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,082 |
Face it. If you stay with him, you'll still end up getting hurt a lot more. He already tried hitting you. The words of "I'm not going to do it again" is going to happen again. How can you love someone who hits you?
"Now all of his friends and he are telling me how sorry he is and that he'll never do it again." Wow, what a coward. He couldn't tell you himself. |
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Oct 24 2004, 06:08 PM
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#7
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 Senior Member Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,799 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,450 |
Dump him. He'll do it again & again
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Oct 24 2004, 06:34 PM
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#8
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 110 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 55,849 |
wow... well... you can do one of two things, do whate everyone says and dump him or just try and help him. afterall, if you like him, you like him. you cant control your own emotions ... personally... i wouldnt dump him but then again... im always too nice too people..
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Oct 24 2004, 07:27 PM
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#9
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 Kermit the frog = <3 Group: Member Posts: 2,315 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 15,215 |
omgosh.
when guys say they won't, they always do. stay away from him while you can. the abuse will get worse if you don't. I'm sorry but you'll have to leave him. |
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Oct 24 2004, 07:40 PM
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#10
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 5,585 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 38,082 |
QUOTE(Danny @ Oct 24 2004, 6:34 PM) wow... well... you can do one of two things, do whate everyone says and dump him or just try and help him. afterall, if you like him, you like him. you cant control your own emotions ... personally... i wouldnt dump him but then again... im always too nice too people.. What kind of advice is that is? If she tries to help, I bet you that he would hit her or do something worse. You can't help him, but maybe like a therapist or something could. Like x3_kelly said, they'll always do it again. We can't make you leave him, but we can tell you that the abuse will get worser and worser. He already tried to hit you. You're scared of him. Doesn't that tell you enough? |
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Oct 24 2004, 07:54 PM
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#11
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 creepy heather Group: Official Member Posts: 4,208 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 41,580 |
dump him...if he is stupid enough to be acting like that he doesn't deserve yoru compassion and you just need to move on
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Oct 24 2004, 07:55 PM
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#12
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 Blasian, Asian, INVASION! Group: Official Member Posts: 4,288 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,769 |
dump him damn..just leave him, he is a fearful guy..he should just be alone in life and think about his actions.
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Oct 24 2004, 08:07 PM
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#13
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 110 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 55,849 |
QUOTE(somechinkgirl @ Oct 24 2004, 8:40 PM) What kind of advice is that is? If she tries to help, I bet you that he would hit her or do something worse. You can't help him, but maybe like a therapist or something could. Like x3_kelly said, they'll always do it again. We can't make you leave him, but we can tell you that the abuse will get worser and worser. He already tried to hit you. You're scared of him. Doesn't that tell you enough? oh, so youre just going to give up if your best friend is insane huh? what would you do if your best friend becomes insane huh!?!?! just leave him there and not care about them anymore? is that what youre going to do? unlike some people, im willing to risk myself to help other people.. |
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Oct 26 2004, 07:26 AM
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#14
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 because i'm worth it Group: Member Posts: 990 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 24,643 |
QUOTE(Pinkxstar @ Oct 24 2004, 5:25 PM) My boyfriend lives like 30 minutes away from me. We started going out like 5 months ago. The first month was great he was really cool and nice. Then all of a sudden he was slitting his wrists and smoking. I knew that he was gothic and punk and stuff but he was just acting way too evil, though I am not implying that goths and punks are evil. Anyway, then his friends started talking to me and telling me that he's a "pothead". I thought they were just trying to make me break up with him. So I ignored them. Then one day we were all hangning out and he was wearing a black t-shirt and I could see the scars on his arms. It really scared me. And then he asked me if I wanted to smoke some pot. I said "No" and he got all mad and started saying that I just didn't like him and then he tried to hit me but I knew that he was going to so i moved back and he started yeeling and then his sister came downstairs and talked to him and I left. Now all of his friends and he are telling me how sorry he is and that he'll never do it again. But I know that sometimes people say that but it always happens again. But I really truly like him and I want to see him get better. But if I reject him I'm afraid he's going to continue cutting himself and be very hurt. Please give whatever helpful advice you have!!! oh my...>< first of all, i hope you are ohkay. i knw this is tough for you..[lotsa broken hearts on cb ayee??] and well. i hope that you will knw guys will think once you gave him 2nd chance..you meant to give them "infinity" chances |
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Oct 26 2004, 08:09 AM
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#15
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 i'm lala. girly girl. Group: Member Posts: 1,531 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 31,888 |
leave him! seriously don't stay with him. it's quite obivous what you should do anyways.
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| *Weird addiction* |
Oct 26 2004, 11:01 AM
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#16
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Guest |
quit le----meaning leave him
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| *AngelicEyz00* |
Oct 26 2004, 01:20 PM
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#17
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Guest |
5 months.... err, I dunno, I don't think I'll put up with that... I think it depends on how serious of a relationship you guys have. Maybe you should try and help him and show him that you care. Suggest for him to stop doing those things
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Oct 26 2004, 10:39 PM
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#18
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 Prez of Student Council 04/05 Group: Member Posts: 2,888 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 851 |
girl u can't be with osmeone ur scared of, move on..
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Oct 27 2004, 05:27 AM
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#19
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Gackt's Wife Group: Member Posts: 411 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 30,549 |
my boyfriend is gothic but he's totally oppisite... he USE to take drugs a year ago... but i never thought if he ever slit his wrist.. now im worried >.< ill look at his wrist when i can... but if u love him stay with him... if he hurts u again leave...
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Oct 27 2004, 03:05 PM
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#20
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asian sensation Group: Member Posts: 773 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 31,091 |
DUDE DONT DUMP HIM!!!!!! IMAGINE HOW THAT MIGHT RUIN HIM!! >_>
sheesh.. he might cut more.. just show you care =) you MUST know him a lil more since its 5 months.. anything can help =) and find out why is he cutting ect.. keep his mind off things and soothe out his problems.. maybe if you found out his problems i might be able to attempt to help you with that too 
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Oct 27 2004, 05:40 PM
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#21
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 ...and this is me.. Group: Member Posts: 3,518 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 57,899 |
hmm...this is hard...i mean...any advice given to you now....it won't make a difference..becuz you'll prob go with what u think is best in the end..becuz what can i say..fromwhat i've read so far....youre prob gonna give this guy another chance....beuz..in the end..love conquers all obstacles.
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Oct 27 2004, 05:46 PM
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#22
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 I'm not mean; You're just a sissy. Group: Member Posts: 796 Joined: Sep 2004 Member No: 51,520 |
my boyfriends gothic too. and he used to be like that.. (but woot i made him see that what he's donig is wrong
 ) once we almost broke up and he freaking cut himself and his chest, etc and geez. it was scary.it all depends what kinda guy he is. and yah, how serious the relationship is. but if he ever tries to hit you again, seriously just dump him. its not worth it if he's hitting you or making you do things you dont want to do. |
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Nov 9 2004, 12:07 AM
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#23
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 1,831 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,324 |
try talking to him. if he doesn't change for the best, maybe you should leave him before he gets even more dangerous.
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Nov 10 2004, 05:25 PM
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#24
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Brie Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 10,172 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 20,548 |
Hard.
Try talking to him before you do anything drastic. If he's not willing to cooperate and shape up, then I'd think about dumping him.. |
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Nov 10 2004, 06:27 PM
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#25
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 i need an sn change. Group: Member Posts: 1,915 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 27,746 |
..if i were u dump him. and stil b friends.
or u can at least try and make him stop doing pot and stop slitting his wrists. tell me u care about him so much and u dont want to lose him if he actulay realy got deep enuf for him to die. if he hurts u again, leave. theres no other way |
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