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best friend and boyfriend at the same time?, doesn't seem to make sense...
aud_chua
post Jul 12 2004, 01:55 PM
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so.. i've been really great friends with this guy. we're kinda like family now.. the thing is.. he's been making moves on me and i don't know what to make of it. yes, i do have feelings for him but i don't want to tell him cuz whatever it is we have right now might disappear. he seems to be wanting to take our relationship a step up but he never announces it. i, on the other hand, just give in to what he does. he kisses, i kiss back. nothing is said afterwards.. i know for a fact that he's not using me cuz he knows me well enough that i wouldn't fall for a silly trick like that..
the thing is, i know communication is the issue here.. but it just doesn't seem to fit. we're really close and yet, we can't tell each other how we feel (or i can't anyway..)
is it possible to act like you're together but you're only bestfriends?
 
sadolakced acid
post Jul 12 2004, 02:07 PM
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do you want him as a best friend or a boy friend?

after he's your boy friend, there's no going back to best friend. the relationship will always be strained after that.
 
aud_chua
post Jul 12 2004, 02:33 PM
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i guess i want him as a boyfriend. but once that's done, like you said, the relationship gets strained.. i don't want that to happen.
 
xsweetdreams12x
post Jul 12 2004, 02:38 PM
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If you're like family, family doesn't kiss. pinch.gif

Once you're best friend becomes your boyfriend, theres no going back. Your relationship will never be the same after you split. _unsure.gif
 
ThePrincessofTKD
post Jul 12 2004, 02:41 PM
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QUOTE(sadolakced acid @ Jul 12 2004, 2:07 PM)
do you want him as a best friend or a boy friend?

after he's your boy friend, there's no going back to best friend. the relationship will always be strained after that.


^^ true.

sorry if i`m comparing you to ashlee simpson...but she kissed her best friend and made out with him. but she was like "it`s fun making out with your best friend" blink.gif anyways....yeah. relationships are complicated. sad.gif
 
aud_chua
post Jul 12 2004, 02:56 PM
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ugh.. ashlee simpson...... well... at least i didn't say anything of the sort.......^^;
but yea...... what i meant by family was that we're really close.. like i can just go into his room without knocking and he'll be fine with it. and i have his house keys and he has mine.. something like that..
see..! it's like we're together already but we really aren't.. so.. i feel like i'm in that gray area where you're really not sure what to do next..
 
Darkpekkle
post Jul 12 2004, 03:00 PM
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relationships are all about taking chances. it seems that both of you really like each other, and if i were you, i would take the chance because i don't want to keep wondering what would've/could've happened... and why let another girl have someone you like?
don't let good opportunities pass you by, because sometimes... you won't get a second chance.

and if the bf/gf thing doesn't work out, it doesn't necessarily mean that you will lose your best friend. i mean yea, it happens but it all depends on how the relationship ends (did someone cheat? etc.), and if both parties still wanna be friends at the end of the bf/gf thing.

in one of my experiences, me and the guy disliked each other for a short while. but after a short amount of time, everything was ok again. we had our differences settled, he found someone new, i found someone new... and things went back to normal. you just have to handle things maturely and realize that boy/girl friends may come and go, but good friendships should last forever. they shouldn't be tossed away over something so trivial.

well, it's all up to you. my situation went well in the end... but it may or may not go the same for you. if you really dont want to risk losing your best friend then dont go out with him... don't kiss him either 'cuz that makes him think that you want to be in a relationship... (unless if you guys like it that way and are fine with that... o_0). i dunnos...
 
sheepy
post Jul 12 2004, 05:11 PM
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QUOTE(Darkpekkle @ Jul 12 2004, 3:00 PM)
relationships are all about taking chances. it seems that both of you really like each other, and if i were you, i would take the chance because i don't want to keep wondering what would've/could've happened... and why let another girl have someone you like?
don't let good opportunities pass you by, because sometimes... you won't get a second chance.

and if the bf/gf thing doesn't work out, it doesn't necessarily mean that you will lose your best friend. i mean yea, it happens but it all depends on how the relationship ends (did someone cheat? etc.), and if both parties still wanna be friends at the end of the bf/gf thing.

in one of my experiences, me and the guy disliked each other for a short while. but after a short amount of time, everything was ok again. we had our differences settled, he found someone new, i found someone new... and things went back to normal. you just have to handle things maturely and realize that boy/girl friends may come and go, but good friendships should last forever. they shouldn't be tossed away over something so trivial.

well, it's all up to you. my situation went well in the end... but it may or may not go the same for you. if you really dont want to risk losing your best friend then dont go out with him... don't kiss him either 'cuz that makes him think that you want to be in a relationship... (unless if you guys like it that way and are fine with that... o_0). i dunnos...

mayb u guys should yeah.. just take the chance b4 its too late
 
x0143637x0
post Jul 12 2004, 05:21 PM
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well id rather have a best friend than a boyfriend. best friends are forever not boyfriends
 
aud_chua
post Jul 15 2004, 01:10 PM
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QUOTE(x0143637x0 @ Jul 12 2004, 5:21 PM)
well id rather have a best friend than a boyfriend. best friends are forever not boyfriends

this is the mentallity i have right now that's why i don't really wanna say i want a more serious relationship.. but then, i really like him..

how sad it is that i am conflicted inside.. i guess that i am not ready then for the relationship if i can't even decide on this.
 
xinfamousXpinayx
post Jul 15 2004, 01:28 PM
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man o man o man. sounds exactly how my relationship is rite now. except that tha fact that my guy is moving. we're not going out..but we shure act like we do. we're juss scared to admit to each other that we like each other bekoz 1. he's moving. 2. we dont want our relationship to end up getting ruined bekoz if we do go out..then we feel that if one of us breaks up with one another our friendship will never be tha same. my guy is close like family..but isnt. he juss gets along with them realli well.
 
FrUiTy TuTie
post Jul 15 2004, 01:35 PM
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i agree with darkpekkle.. u should take the chance and take the risk of having a boyfriend to love for a looong time or losing one of ur best friends..

just sit him down an talk to him, if he agrees to be boyfriend give him a long lovin kiss!! biggrin.gif
.
 
XaZnX07
post Jul 15 2004, 01:38 PM
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i think since you guys are so closes then your relationship will be the best if! if! you guys brake up you guys would still have the friendship so just go out with him cause you dont want to go through life thinking back what if i went out with him you know ? so just go for it okies good luck




.:tony:.
 
dani41790
post Jul 15 2004, 02:33 PM
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err that sounds confusing but umm i think u guys should start dating if u realli like each other. if u guys break up u guys can stio b bestfrenz.
 
islandkiss
post Jul 15 2004, 03:31 PM
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QUOTE(aud_chua @ Jul 12 2004, 2:33 PM)
i guess i want him as a boyfriend. but once that's done, like you said, the relationship gets strained.. i don't want that to happen.

just take your time and work on your problems. tell him how you feel.. if you want this to work then you have to try.
 
audory
post Jul 15 2004, 04:43 PM
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QUOTE(sadolakced acid @ Jul 12 2004, 2:07 PM)
do you want him as a best friend or a boy friend?

after he's your boy friend, there's no going back to best friend. the relationship will always be strained after that.

well actually i went owt w/ my best guy fwend nd we broke up lyk a month ago nd were still best fwends... so i guess it depends on the ppl.. or the intensity of the break-up... huh.gif if that makes sense.. xD
 
always_n0vember
post Jul 15 2004, 07:07 PM
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QUOTE(Darkpekkle @ Jul 12 2004, 3:00 PM)
relationships are all about taking chances. it seems that both of you really like each other, and if i were you, i would take the chance because i don't want to keep wondering what would've/could've happened... and why let another girl have someone you like?
don't let good opportunities pass you by, because sometimes... you won't get a second chance.

and if the bf/gf thing doesn't work out, it doesn't necessarily mean that you will lose your best friend. i mean yea, it happens but it all depends on how the relationship ends (did someone cheat? etc.), and if both parties still wanna be friends at the end of the bf/gf thing.

True!! I so agree with that...

So who said that your boyfriend can't be your bestfriend??
My boyfriend is my bestfriend. And we've been together for like 3 years.. and we're havin a baby!! so.. yeah... he can be both... you just have to open up and talk... if he wont say nothing after you too kiss... then maybe you should.. like.. "that was nice.. i like this...you&me.. its a nice thing.." haha i dunno.. thats cute.. but yeah hope everything works out for you!!!
 
Boricuahh_Mamii
post Jul 15 2004, 09:42 PM
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if ur really close i guess that u should try it out...im goin out wit 1nna ma frens an its been mad good..u dun havta go thru that uncomfortable sh*t learning about tha person cuz u alreddy kno him..if u break up, u probably wont have the same best friend relationship, but maybe it would even b betta.. ermm.gif
 
conster
post Jul 15 2004, 10:59 PM
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he can ur bf AND best friend, a lot of couples treat each other like best friends cuz they share their thoughts wit each other... well iwould go for him.. ill jus make sure to tell him that whatever happens... we gonna be best friends forever even if our relationship dont work.. u can tell him u wanna give it a try
 
babiexmuii
post Jul 15 2004, 11:11 PM
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he can be both-a bff is a person to tell everything to and to share advice and have fun with.
a bf is a love relationship

...at least that's my theory
 
babygurl_xtacy
post Jul 16 2004, 12:53 AM
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to some people... their bfs are their best friends cuz thats the only person that knows you well enough..
boyfriend; best friend; the other half..
 
defjam_gangsta
post Jul 17 2004, 08:43 AM
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GREETINGS!!

ya walkin on a pit of fire. better get ya signals and his rights. knowing tat he is close wit ya family, it made even worst. have ya ever thought of wat its' gonna be if things didn't work out and it's gonna affect more than one person. ya gotta think inda long run. short term is such a no-no for me!! think abt it. set ya issues right aight?! _smile.gif

CHEERS CB!!
 

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