MOTM Interview!, Conducted by yours truly Options

[DoubleJ]

Hey, it's me the one and only! The most decorated people staff member of all time! The man single handedly responsible for the cb xbox 360 tournaments! JAVONN "BLACK MACHISMO" JOHNSON!

Let's get this interview started.....Tonight our guest is very distinguised. A 22 year female from west bubblef**k, she is the current member of the month on that site called createblog...home to yours truly. Let's here it for CARRIE!!!!!


*audience applause*

Welcome to the show....

How has your day been going so far? Well, since it's after midnight here my day's just started, but I guess it'll be okay. I have to go on a brunch cruise with my senior citizen-aged relatives later on, that's not going to be that fun. But hey, it's free (for me), so I can't complain.

What did you have for dinner? For those who don't know, I'm a vegetarian; I had a Morning Star spicy black bean burger and mashed potatoes.

So let's just get on down to business shall we? And I'mma give the business to you (oh-oh ooh-oh-ooh)

Obama or JM? Obama.

Why? 'Cos black is the new president, bitch. But on a more serious note, it's because Barack Obama can lift his arms above his head.

Did you watch the vma's? Yeah, I did. Surprisingly.

hmmmm interesting..... I know, right?

So now onto questions that I want to ask..... Ask away!

Why do some monkeys have pink asses? Is it because it is like sunburned or something? Too much monkey sex.

Ahh you are a reality television watcher no? I love reality TV.

So do you watch The Hills? I've watched exactly one episode of The Hills. Didn't feel like catching up on what I've missed (I didn't watch Laguna Beach, either), so I didn't stick with it. That and it's lame.

hmmmm....I see I see.... Besides, those bitches are on Perez all the time, I feel like I watch it.

What is your favorite drink at the bar? Oh god, too many.

Is that so? Yeah.

Do you think that you could outdrink me? Hmm... maybe at one point in time but since I haven't been drinking since I've been home. Well, I take that back, I had three or four drinks at an open bar at a concert last week and I was pretty unaffected. It would be an interesting competition. We should try that sometime.

How many times have you made out with a member of the same sex? Zero.

..... Seriously.

You are walking down the street, and you see the one person who you admire the most kissing the one person that you hate the most, what do you do? Put my head down and power ahead so they don't see me.

Two of my professors are flaming homos, but they are so cool....should I be nervous that they might try to take my sexiness from me? LOL, no, no you shouldn't.

How often do you like to have sex? As often as I can get it.

Ooohhh is that right? Yeah. It doesn't happen that often (unfortunately).

So I am trying to decide which type of porn I should watch tonight...should I watch lesbian, or straight porn? Lesbian.

Why? It's what I would watch.

Ok Word Association Time:

Tung: He's cool

Dani: Old head.

Rebecca: Gorgeous momma.

David Letterman: Ass.

M.I.A. f**kin' awesome.

Lil Wayne: Eh...

Paperplane: All I wanna do is *gunshots* and *cashregister* and take your money. Nicki's cool too.

Penis: Hell yeah.

Dick: I wish I had some in my life.

Vagina: I have one.

Pussy: I hate that word outside the context of the bedroom.

Stella Artois: Watery ass beer.

Javonn: Awesome.

Drunk: I wish I were right now.

Sexy: Not me.

Porn: I've been watching it a lot lately.

Where do you see yourself five years from now? In New York, working for a magazine, and going to all the fashion week shows and going to concerts for free.

What are three things you will try to do while being member of the month? Be awesome, post a lot, and surpass people on the overall posters list. I'm gaining on you, Becks!

Ladies and gentleman give it up for her! Aw, thanks for having me. It's been fun.

*applause*