winter of my discontent, (pretending) Options

[ryfitaDF]

this just kind of happend. it doesn't rhyme. i'm remembering my ex, Ericka, and mising her alot for some reason. i might just be PMSing. anyway, it's about how i fealt after she dumped me in february 03. the 2 CDs i listened to more than any other were marilyn manson's "mechanical animals" and down's "II" and i watched alot of jason movies at the time, if you can see the refrences. anyway, here it is. and please comment.

WINTER OF MY DISCONTENT
The shape of things in this world
I must say it makes me sad
The snow falls on this city again
Surprisingly, it can get colder
As I step on sordid slush
It splashes the way gore does
It fits, I suppose
I feel nothing inside me
Pretend it’s on the floor

White and cold
Are the snow and me
This is my shelter
Under the stain-glass cross
Forty below in here
I rot in bed
Living without reason
Crying for answers digging my thumbs into my pillow
Pretending it’s your eyes

I cannot escape where I am going
And I cannot outrace the speed of pain
Phil and Jason are the only ones who can help me
Wanting to kill you and save you simultaneously
Because I still love you, you f**king c***
I’m still waiting for the letter from you
Where your tears blur the blue lines
Reading “I miss you”
Pretending it will come

Waterfalls and birds now
It’s the last day on earth
I see the sky talking to me
In the snow, the cold white mother
The planet is as good as dead
I wish you didn’t become such a whore
Because I knew you were different
From the rest of the world
Pretending it was the right decision

Snowed in, early last year
Trapped without you, my boots stomp
I remember they made me so much taller than you
And the best part is, in the beginning,
I didn’t even have to ask
It was how it was and it was incredible
We were us, they were everyone else
I couldn’t even beg enough for you to stay
Pretending that I stopped
Pretending I ever had a chance
Pretending I ever had worth
Pretending too d*** much…