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"You're a bad friend"
SimplicityGirl
post Aug 9 2008, 06:36 PM
Post #1


Being happy...is all that matters
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It's me again, with another friend issue, with the same friend, L.

Both me and L are volunteers for this orientation program for incoming first year students at the university that we go to. As it turns out, there is a volunteer appreciation BBQ tomorrow--naturally both me and L were invited to go. L accepted the invitation, while I declined. He asked me today why I'm not going (he's been asking me to go for the past few days, I said no each time), and I told him because I didn't feel like going even though I don't have any major obligations tomorrow(...which is why I declined the invitation). He then told me that fine, he doesn't "feel like going" to this day trip that I planned that he's invited to. Then he said that I was being a bad friend because I used the excuse of "not feeling like going" to not accompanying a friend. But he never, in all those times he bugged me if I was going, mentioned that he wants me to go with him. Oh yes, he ended the convo with "I don't feel like talking to you bye", but msged half an hour later with the mockery of "so I guess you don't have anything to say for yourself? *clap* clap*...and msged me again saying how I don't care about him, but it's always about how I feel and stuff. I haven't replied him, and I don't think I will.

I don't know what to make of all this. Am I at fault? I don't see how though, if I am at fault--I've declined other friends' invitations with that, and vice versa. None of us got mad over that. He says I'm a close friend of his, but at the moment he's not--as my boyfriend pointed out "Good friends respect each others' wishes, and don't force them into doing stuff they don't want to". I know he's been having problems with his parents and grandma at home, but to me, I don't think that gives him a right to do what he did. It's totally different story if he had asked me to go with him, but he never did, so I don't know why he's 1) taking it so personally 2) personally attacking me 3) making a fuss over it. So what if I rather spend the day bumming around at home tomorrow? I don't see how that makes me a bad friend.

So what do you guys think? And before someone puts this out as a suggestion, no he does not like me beyond a friend.

Thanks.
 

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