Those 3 words [i love you], pressured into saying it? |
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 Apr 1 2008, 08:59 PM
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#1
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 Amor caecus est  Group: Member Posts: 110 Joined: Mar 2007 Member No: 508,949  |
Me and my boyfriend were hanging out and we were making out for a bit... I guess things got "hot" and then he just said "[my name] i love you" and I said "i love you too"
It's not that i mind that he loves me... it's just that we've only been dating for 1 1/2 month and i just don't know why he said it... it would have been fine with me if he hadn't said that for a while... and I don't know if i love him... i know i really like him... but love? has anyone else feel like they're been maybe pressured into saying that back? |
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Apr 1 2008, 09:48 PM
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#2
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 yo yo yiggidy yo. Group: Official Member Posts: 1,606 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 108,591 |
this is like deja vu reading this, lmao.
you shouldn't be pressured into saying something like that because "i love you" isn't something you throw around in everyday conversation with people. my boyfriend was similar to this, he said "i love you" REALLY early in our relationship. a lot earlier than i would have said it. but of course i felt really bad because i thought he would expect me to say it back. so when he said it, i was like, "uhh.. thanks?" lmao. it was actually funny. so right after, he told me that he didn't expect me to say it back and that it was just how he felt and how he really wanted to tell me because he's never felt that way about anyone, etc etc etc. so never feel pressured to do anything that you don't want to do. and i don't think your boyfriend was expecting you to say it back, or was he? |
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Apr 1 2008, 10:25 PM
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#3
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 JABBAWOCKEEZfan Group: Member Posts: 108 Joined: Mar 2008 Member No: 635,309 |
infatuation!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Apr 1 2008, 11:36 PM
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#4
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Amor caecus est Group: Member Posts: 110 Joined: Mar 2007 Member No: 508,949 |
I mean, I've told him "i love you" before when we were friends [we've been friends for about 2 1/2 years] but that's different... and yeah, i do think he expected me to say it back.
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Apr 1 2008, 11:45 PM
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#5
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 The Illustrious Mari C. Group: Member Posts: 586 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 26,671 |
I've felt pressured before when I was younger & I'd just go on & say it back but I didn't mean it in the sense that they probably did...Love is a powerful word & I've learned over time it's better not to say it if you don't mean it because you don't know how they can affect the other person & if they truly love you they'd still respect that you dont feel the same way & it won't change their feelings for you either otherwise it definitely isn't real
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Apr 1 2008, 11:52 PM
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#6
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 chinky Group: Official Designer Posts: 2,566 Joined: Jul 2006 Member No: 434,437 |
To answer your question. No. I don't think so? lol
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Apr 1 2008, 11:59 PM
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#7
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 114 Joined: Dec 2007 Member No: 598,863 |
love = fake
damn hopeless romantics... |
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Apr 2 2008, 01:48 AM
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#8
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JABBAWOCKEEZfan Group: Member Posts: 108 Joined: Mar 2008 Member No: 635,309 |
i dnt think there's such thing anymore as true love at a young age. this is a different generation. there's gonna be any high skool sweet hearts that stay married like before. now it's juss puppy love or infatuation.
it is weird to say it if u dnt really mean it. maybe u'r juss pressured coz u'r thinkin if u dnt say it, that person would think u dnt feel the same way. wat about try sayin somethin really sweet or do somethin sweet. like if he says i love u, kiss him or be like, "awww, ur soo cute!" then cuddle or kiss him lol. it's better than not sayin i love u i guess lol. |
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Apr 2 2008, 12:00 PM
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#9
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 drama is so intising i might just bite a mothaf**ka like tyson Group: Member Posts: 266 Joined: Mar 2008 Member No: 636,361 |
You just shouldnt say it back if you dont feel it back, or just because thats what you think he wants to hear. You could hurt him because you lied so talk to him about it before he really thinks you love him and are in love with him. good luck
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Apr 2 2008, 12:15 PM
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#10
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 Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 3,291 Joined: Feb 2007 Member No: 503,024 |
Don't be rushing things so quick, especially if you guys have been going out for such a short time.
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Apr 2 2008, 12:19 PM
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#11
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 Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 6,349 Joined: Aug 2006 Member No: 455,274 |
QUOTE(bitesnkisses @ Apr 1 2008, 09:59 PM)  Me and my boyfriend were hanging out and we were making out for a bit... I guess things got "hot" and then he just said "[my name] i love you" and I said "i love you too" It's not that i mind that he loves me... it's just that we've only been dating for 1 1/2 month and i just don't know why he said it... it would have been fine with me if he hadn't said that for a while... and I don't know if i love him... i know i really like him... but love? has anyone else feel like they're been maybe pressured into saying that back? Sex. He's conditioning you for sex. Men tend to be very slick, they use the word love repeatedly to brain wash you and take advantage of you. Love isn't spontaneous. Anyone who says it is, is either a kid or some sort of retard who hasn't really experienced love. Love is a thing of patience, it's depended on knowledge of self and your partner. On a emotional, mental, and physical level. He's only sayin those words to confuse you and get you to give it up to him easier and quicker into the relationship. |
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Apr 2 2008, 12:28 PM
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#12
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 717 Joined: Mar 2008 Member No: 636,551 |
If you're feeling pressured to say the words, then you shouldn't say them at all. It isn't fair to him if you say them and don't exactly mean them, which I don't think you do at this point (from what you've said). I've felt like this before in my earlier relationships too. As Kay said, love is a powerful word, and shouldn't be thrown out there every which way. Wait until you're sure you mean it to say it back to him, and maybe talk to him about saying it to you, as well. Communication is a big factor in relationships.
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Apr 2 2008, 04:29 PM
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#13
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Amor caecus est Group: Member Posts: 110 Joined: Mar 2007 Member No: 508,949 |
QUOTE(Tamacracker @ Apr 2 2008, 12:19 PM) Sex. He's conditioning you for sex. Men tend to be very slick, they use the word love repeatedly to brain wash you and take advantage of you. Love isn't spontaneous. Anyone who says it is, is either a kid or some sort of retard who hasn't really experienced love. Love is a thing of patience, it's depended on knowledge of self and your partner. On a emotional, mental, and physical level. He's only sayin those words to confuse you and get you to give it up to him easier and quicker into the relationship. lol, finally someone said what flashed in my mind when he said that... i was like "great... he wants to get in my pants" lol... yeah, I've thought that could be true too... when he says it I just want to be like... oh, that's sweet 
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Apr 2 2008, 04:50 PM
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#14
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Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 6,349 Joined: Aug 2006 Member No: 455,274 |
Just be careful with males. Some are men & some are dogs.
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Apr 3 2008, 03:26 AM
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#15
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JABBAWOCKEEZfan Group: Member Posts: 108 Joined: Mar 2008 Member No: 635,309 |
pssshhh!! i wanted to say somethin bout sex but then i wasnt sure if it was ok in the forum hahahaha.
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Apr 3 2008, 11:13 AM
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#16
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yo yo yiggidy yo. Group: Official Member Posts: 1,606 Joined: Mar 2005 Member No: 108,591 |
QUOTE(bitesnkisses @ Apr 2 2008, 12:36 AM) I mean, I've told him "i love you" before when we were friends [we've been friends for about 2 1/2 years] but that's different... and yeah, i do think he expected me to say it back. then yeah.... lol. probably sex. but who knows maybe he really does feels that way because my current boyfriend said it really early. but he didn't "get in my pants" until way later in our relationship. |
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Apr 3 2008, 08:13 PM
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#17
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 here, here, and here Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 3,301 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 206,103 |
The problem for me is not saying it...it's me saying it too much
I abuse those words "I love you" I say it to everyone. |
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