a poem, crtique it please? |
a poem, crtique it please? |
Feb 26 2008, 07:58 PM
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![]() Newbie ![]() Group: Member Posts: 6 Joined: Apr 2007 Member No: 514,601 |
Trapped in a box
Not out of the ordinary Surrounded by luxuries How can this be? These things, they mean nothing Nothing to me He meant the most I have nothing to do Trapped in a box I feel anger Not mine The tension is silent As sad as my heart But he won’t turn around I have nothing to do Trapped in a box It hurts Passion’s gone But I can’t regret it They deserved what they got It all started out With an innocent kiss And the thought in my mind I have nothing to do i havent written much in a while nd im thinking of entering it in a contest. some feedback would be great |
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omgah itz minji a poem Feb 26 2008, 07:58 PM
yrrnotelekktric i like it, but is there a title to it? Mar 8 2008, 03:42 PM
danceeNAKED its beautiful.
but gosh it gives me the willies. ... Mar 8 2008, 03:43 PM![]() ![]() |