a modest proposal, Some tips if you want to be hired for CB Staff Options

[*kryogenix*]

I am awesome. You should really listen to me. The first time I became staff, I told micron to make me people staff and he did it. The second time I had the a big mad wack application and it beat out other people that tried so hard. You guys would rather talk about the shit that comes out of my ass than other people's pictures. That says something.

So here are my tips to become a mod for the next hiring session:

1. Join Createblog chat and suck their dicks. Seriously. Kiss ass. Be a brown noser. This will score you super points with the mods. The more you participate in the CB Circle Jerk, the better the chances you have at being mod.

2. Become enemies with kryogenix. The worst thing that can happen to your chances of becoming staff is to get friendly with kryogenix. The mods will hate that. Thus, it is logical to conclude that becoming enemies with kryo will have an inverse effect. Whenever you see kryo post, tell him how mean he is. Rat out his posts to the mods. Post bullshit in the feedback threads that he posts in even if you are in no way involved and have no f**king clue what you're talking about. 100 points to Gryffyndor if you keep bullshitting about the spoiler controversy so that the mods don't have to apologize.

3. Start modding now. Everyone appreciates it when someone makes a thread and you reply "uhh this is spam. someone close." The more people that post in a spam thread identifying the thread as spam, the better. There should be a ratio of "hey this is spam, close this thread!" type posts to actual spam posts at all times. Do this and you'll be on your way to modding in no time.

4. When writing your application, greatly exaggerate stuff about you on this site. Mention how popular you are- popularity is the best indicator for a good mod. If you're a 14 year old girl, keep reminding them of how mature you are for your age. Remember: If you keep piling on the bullshit, it'll eventually become fertilizer. This will all but guarantee you a spot on staff.

Good luck to all applicants!