i thought it's over... Options

[starmoonshore]

i have a close friend and it's been years since we talked to each other. we both have our own lives and pretty much set to where our future will be. however, going back to the time im about to leave my home country and migrate, on the day of my departure, i called my close friend telling him that im going to leave for good and if i did come back, i'll just visit.

but... i never thought that day he found out that i liked him... i cried thinking it's already over and once he finds out that i like him, he might just ignore me. instead, he replied and told me... "as much as i want to have a relationship with you... i don't want to because i dont want to hurt you because of me. and if we got together and it ends up that we hurt each other, our friendship would be over but if we stayed as friends and also hurt each other... we could just forgive each other and pretend nothing happened." that's what he told me. quite honestly, i dont kind of understand what he said that time...

but as time goes by... that thing that he told me is still stuck in my head... and that conversation i had was already 5 years ago... since i always keep in touch with my friends even though im far away from them, i manage to at least chat with them through e-mail or messenger or sometimes on the phone.

lately, i called him and asked how he was. he said he's doing good and he have a new gf. actually when i asked him about his gf, he always denies that he have one. and i keep on asking him why keep on denying since i already know it's his gf. then, that's the time he's gonna tell me.. "ok... she's my girlfriend." also, during that time i also got a new bf after a few months of my break-up with my ex. i told him the story of how i broke up with my ex. and so, after i told him how my relationship with my ex was so f***ed up.. he suddenly mentioned something and said... "i hope you waited for me..." i was surprised on what he said. i asked him to repeat it again... but he denied that he didnt say anything. so i got mad but he did say that and i heard it. i just wanted him to repeat it.

my question is why do you think he said that "i should have waited for him". what does he try to imply? does it have anything to do with our past conversation 5 years ago? and also, last 5 years, do you think he has feelings for me or he just said it? i don't understand at all.