friend who acts, different now ... Options

[demolished]

Recently, I had been feeling annoyed, irritated, and angered to a great friend of mine. Dude, there is something screwing up my mind. Last year, we would act stupid, act retarded, do stupid things, and act immature little brat. I had a lot of fun and enjoyed the lamest thing ever. My friend was a huge influence in me … like, extremely huge and made a part of me. Unlike this year, everything is just too different. We don't laugh as much as we used to. We don't do as much crap as before. My friend doesn't want to act retarded, do stupid things, or act immature. Basically, my friend stops creating a fun & comfortable atmosphere. Everything is just dead. My friend knows that very well.

One time, we were passing by a place where we had a lot of memories there. My friend talked about how fun it was, the days, the time, and everything. Then, my friend says. "Remember the time when we did this and that with a couple of friends…. ". And "… now, we don't do it anymore. We were too immature back then. We're matured now". Then I say, "No, I'm not"

I was a bit annoyed by the statement which leads me to create this topic.

Now, I'm feeling a bit lost. It's like.... "Did I lost a friend who I once knew"

And by way, my friend always talked about "mature" now. It's getting so god dam f**king irritating. What the f**k is wrong with my god dam friend? We were pretty cool, and then … something has to get in the way.

I'm just lost. LOL. Is it natural that a friend becomes different and everything dies away?

[Blaqheartedstar]

people are subject to change, but i wouldn't say u lost your friend, talk to him and ask wtf happened.
um... does the people around him act the same?
or i can be some event that lead him to suddenly drop the immaturity
all i can say is talk to your friend, things might help instead of the constant awkward moments you now have

[demolished]

good idea. i'll beat the shit at my friend with questions. thanks.



dude, it's so ironic. i'm actually mature in real life. ever since, i entered high school, My friend influenced me and i started acting more "immature" with friends just to mess around. Now, my friends want "mature" attitude and started blabbing about being mature" and "not wanna mess around".




and who's "him". where did you get "him" from?

[alysaphobia]

that sucks.
mostly whenever my friends change, it's a bad thing. for our friendship, anyways.

i'd try to ask him casually "what's wrong with _____?" the next time he doesn't want to mess around, joke around, etc. if he seems to be genuinely serious about not wanting to do whatever, i think you should just drop it and distance yourself from him if it's going to take the fun out of everything. people can change, a LOT in high school... and you can't reverse it, for good or for worse.

[cori-catastrophe]

your friend is growing up. it happens to people. you get more mature eventually too. =]

[*suddenly she*]

Wow, I can kind of relate to this, except I'm the one that's stopped goofing around.

I haven't totally stopped goofing around but it's just that it flat out annoys me that some people still haven't grown up yet. I doubt this is the same case as it is with you, but I have a close friend or at least ex-close friend that I used to do dumb stuff with all the time.

We were kind of like siblings, except a couple things happened over the summer and I figured it was time to cut the crap... Sometimes you just want to quit goofing around.

Except my friend didn't and therefore we're not close anymore.

It's not like I'm attempting to suck the air out of every room I walk into. He still talks to me about his problems and all because I've always been able to find a way for him to get out of it, and it's the same for a lot of other people I'm not close to anymore.

I guess it's natural...

[demolished]

your friend is growing up. it happens to people. you get more mature eventually too. =]

Psh. i can act mature anytime soon. I find immaturity to be fun than mature.

Wow, I can kind of relate to this, except I'm the one that's stopped goofing around.

I haven't totally stopped goofing around but it's just that it flat out annoys me that some people still haven't grown up yet. I doubt this is the same case as it is with you, but I have a close friend or at least ex-close friend that I used to do dumb stuff with all the time.

We were kind of like siblings, except a couple things happened over the summer and I figured it was time to cut the crap... Sometimes you just want to quit goofing around.

Except my friend didn't and therefore we're not close anymore.

It's not like I'm attempting to suck the air out of every room I walk into. He still talks to me about his problems and all because I've always been able to find a way for him to get out of it, and it's the same for a lot of other people I'm not close to anymore.

I guess it's natural...

It's kind of stupid. Why would a friend drop the crap and start being mature when all the fun is there? I really don't believe to be immature. I acted immature because my friend was acting immature before. High school is all about fitting into groups. But, really ... i know what's right from wrong but i still do the wrong things. Like, we would lie in the middle of the street in front of the cars being stupid, bark at people, shouting, dancing, stripping with the statue in front of the police camera, constantly jumping on the crosswalk, and etc. How should I say this...? I'm more mentally matured than physically? No clue.



In high school, when you tried to get into the people, our attitude changes to be compatible with the people. It takes times to asorb people's influences and the way they do things. Anyways, does it make a person less than themself ?

[*suddenly she*]

You can have fun without being immature... people can have conversations and have fun, can't they?

I didn't bother to fit in with groups for too long in high school. It's like the typical thing for a kid like me to join the little asian mafia or girl gang or whatever, but I don't fit in... period. I figure that if I do my own thing and be friendly to everyone, then the few people I really want as my friends will connect with me. aand all those people so far (okay, it adds up to maybe... honestly, two off the top of my head) are somewhat off their rockers, but we have fun in our own way.

Being slightly more mature than others does not make me less compatible with people - or at least, I think so. Maybe I just have the wrong idea about things, but I've been elected and selected for a good deal of positions in class by teachers and students, and I doubt that they'd be picking me for jobs or representation if they thought I wasn't compatible.

idk, I just think that there are better ways to have fun than making fools of ourselves.

[demolished]

I find it easier to have fun when i acted immature. When I'm with matured friends, my god ... I don't last very long with them in a group.


You're totally right. I should be doing my own thing and stop wanting to act immature little brat. I have the energy to blow the hell out of myself like a kid.

No, if you're much matured and you're hanging out with super dumbass immature people, these immature people are going to make you feel embarrassed, weird, and exile.

Like ... during lunch, my immature friends and i were shouting, throwing food, and crazily laughing with matured friends. These matured friends were so annoyed, standing there quietly, not laughing, and just staring at us while we're being stupid.

Maturity levels does affect social situation.

[*suddenly she*]

Personally, when I'm around my "immature friends," I don't really feel embarrassed... I don't feel like I have a reason to be embarrassed. I'm not in charge of what they do and I don't care too much how much I influence what they do now - it's what counts later. Usually I just tell them to "quit it" and they won't be as obnoxious, which is enough for me.

Hopefully one day they're going to make a choice that's good for them and I just want to be someone that's going to help them through in a positive way. I guess I'm kind of like their mom.

[demolished]

What should i do now? Everything just feels different now. i'm so lost. HAHA.





thanks, suddenly she ;] what's your name?

[*suddenly she*]

I'm Ruth. And you are?

I don't really know what you'd do in your situation, but the least you could do is drop by sometimes and say hi and have a regular conversation as civilly as possible to catch up on what's going on in his life so he knows you care. A bit of contact is better than none at all.

[demolished]

Steven ;D

I really appreciated your experiences and information.