Createblog Diary, Version 9.0 Options

[devaani]

Dear Createblog Diary,
I LOVE MY BEST FRIEND.

[synthase]

Dear diary,
I got an annoying 'best friend'
shes stealing all my friends and its not cool anymore -- it was never cool. Shes difting apart from me because she wants to be 'in the crowd' and she doesnt want to be seen with me.
The other day she said that 10% of $200 was only 5 dollars off
I tryed telling her/explaining to her that it was $20 off instead of $5
but she wouldnt listen

[angelrevelation]

Dear Cb Diary,

Today was a surprisingly good day. PE was even fun, partially because _____ was super nice.
But A is really annoying me. I think he likes me now. That's what, 8 months too late? I guess it's good though. If we had gone out it would have turned out horrible.

[flutterby88]

so frickin torn. always so full of jealousy. but i know she still loves me so that's comforting. just something i gotta deal with. why won't he hire me? i'll email him. and if only i had enough time for him and school, something's always gotta give. i'll do it though, i know i can. but she made my day at work today! it was great seeing them too, but i've been looking for a chance to perform that song! i'll definitely look into auditioning, if only i could convince them to let me dance too. should i go do homework now? yes, i'll shower first and then read until he calls. oh i hope i can dance too! i wanna show everyone i'm more talented than they remember. but i'll work on the song. so excited! and things are working out, just need a little more effort on my part. thank god i have him to believe in me, cuz sometimes i lack that strength. it's gonna be a good week:D.

edit--> he's on leave! BALLS! now how long will i have to wait? i wanted to quit zellers before i had to book off the days for miami. ok, i guess i'll have to now. i better talk to J-A.

[Jinny]

dear diary

my best friend claims that she likes __
and __ likes her back. [he really does]
and i told her who i liked.
and shes flirting with him.
i wanna b!tchslap her.
on the cheek.
and i hope she gets bad relationships.

[angelrevelation]

Dear Cb Diary,

Just as I was getting happy... Why is it that all my friends are getting fallen for? What's wrong with me? I mean of course I'm happy for them, but it's so frustrating when people are experiencing these fairy tale moments and I'm just overlooked, as a last resort.

I don't know what to think about ___. do I like him? Does he like me? I've always gotten the feeling that he does occasionally, but then again he often acts the same around any of his friends that are girls... But last night he was especially acting like it. But I don't want to think anything of it. When ____ liked him and asked him about me (she was suspicious about it) he said only ever as a friend.
And I don't know if I like him. Every guy that I've liked, I've never known well. And there's always been this sort of crazy obsessiveness about it, like daydreaming and thinking of all these scenarios. But it's not like that with him. There's just this warm feeling. But I do get the urge to hug him a lot though. Is that mature liking?

[*stephinika*]

Dear cB diary,

This weekend definitely turned out to be funnn. His birthday turned out pretty good actually...a few moments when I thought they wouldn't but it worked. Minus me being really sick and tired feeling last night to this morning and that I have canker sores taking over my mouth.

[Stefanny]

dear cbd,
i hate the f**cking social studies test. making me study twice as hard as normal. ;_;

[Jane Doe.]

I can't stand it here. This house is so disgusting. I cannot stand being in my room any longer but I have no where to go. I know it is stupid of me to want out when I don't even have my driver's license but you know what? I have no issue with asking my parents to get me out. They say they care and that they'd help me--well, I feel like throwing my OD in their face if they get angry. Hey, at least in the hospital it was clean. I could visit him... though god I am scared. My weight, my appearance.. eek. Six months. Six months to get my license. I'm starting to think this place is detrimental to any progress I may have made/will do/etc. Yeah, okay, no more crying and bitching. I need to do something.

[minioligo]

When did I get so bitter?
I just want to be happy. I don't want anything else. I don't want anything specific. Is that too much to ask for?

I think that I appreciated it so much, I let it go too fast. I knew I wouldn't have kept it for long. Friendships are so hard to keep sometimes.

I don't have courage. I don't have the courage to make it all better again.

Now I know what I want. I want a new start.

[pkbabe]

dear cbd,

Went to my very 1st Laker game yesterday(Lakers-Knicks 106-107). It was fun But the temporary fun time has passed so its back to my everyday stressful life. I don't know whether I'm going to finally go to college this semester. I already missed fall semester but complications from the stupid city college & their policies are making it hard for me to start this spring.

It was shown on my info that I wasn't a Cali resident. It wasn't even my fault that my info was incorrect & I have proven that over & over. They even got out my application & in black pen with my handwriting is says "permanent resident". So the fault was all on them. So they demanded for proof but even what I gave them wasn't good enough. I mean, I already proven that with my cali ID card,my id cards from all 4 yrs of high school showing I went to high school in the same town as the college(which is my town) & showed them my green card but yet they still didn't accept them & demanded for my federal papers. I've been in the US since '95 & I don't even remember the old country or my own language...I just don't understand why trying to apply for college has to be so complicated(well the college I was trying to get into).

If that doesn't work out, I plan on moving out with my mom & work until sept & just go to the college she went to. It will be easy to actually get in because she knows all the teachers & also she told me that they don't demand my federal papers for proof of residence like the school I was trying to get into. I have no idea what will happen at this point. Only time will tell I suppose

[edit] I totally forgot about today. I helped my bro make gifts for his friends. It was a story book of how they met & coupons like "free movie" & stuff like that. I have good idea when it comes to gifts

[flutterby88]

phew!

i still have a chance. but gosh, that was horrible news to hear:(. i hope he's not in too much pain. and i gotta visit carney about those auditions! and omg i'm not gonna sleep this weekend. midterms!! ahhh! not ready! but i can do it! just like dance, i know i can do it, it's not good enough for me right now. why am i so out of shape? i don't have stamina like i used to. 2 hours shouldn't kill me like that. and i thought my technique was better. need to practice more. kait! i need a dance lesson! and omg he's so perfect! today was just like i hoped it would be, except for that. but i don't really have control over that. maybe it just takes more time. ahhh well, i'm in no rush.

[Insecure Emotion...]

dear diary,

i brought my grade from a d+ to an a in geometry =), i think i still have a b in english though, but anyyyyways. stuuupid drew (i think you're hot though haha). you have to keep on telling me that jeremy likes me. you make me blush all the time. hahaha. thanks for making him walk me to class though. i don't care if he likes me or not, cause im fine letting go of people, but the moment was great. =) i got butterflies! happy valentines day everyone!

p.s. jeremy, i think i'm falling for you... & i'm too grown-up for this. no more relationships until my junior year. i'd REALLY love to get to know you better though. let's talk some more, you always make me smile =)

[*stephinika*]

Dear cB diary,

So Valentine's day actually turned out pretty decently. He got off work early somehow and showed up after my classes with flowers and my shirt from AE hehe...but yeah so that was exciting and I got to spend more time with him than expected. Dinner was yummy - had a tasty margarita - and then had fun chilling with the other 2 at Starbucks. Giggle fest over that lil' story hehe...soooo adorable. And yeah so tonight is his surprise for me and I'm pretty excited and impatient to say the least...still mad about my damn canker sores though...they're getting better but they still hurt. Sigh. What else...got a bit upset last night but I'm over it. My parents are just a touchy subject with me...I have this whole big talk with my mom about how she won't scold me if I tell her I'm ready for sex (awkwarddd convo but good at the same time hah) and she'd let me go to the doctor and get the pill but then they get mad if I stay up past a certain time even though if I wasn't on the phone I'd still be awake...grr...so lame! They just don't seem to treat me like I'm my age with that kind of thing, and going out or being home a certain time and driving and it pisses me off...then on the phone with him he's saying all these negative things about me moving out which I'd love to do but I know I can't because of all those things so I got upset because I have already thought of all that and those are the reasons I haven't left yet...blahhhh.
Stupid stupid parents. But whatever.

I miss him. And summer. And Christina. I can't wait for the cruise...77 days until we leave and 31 days of class/exams. I can't wait.

[femmefatale4160]

Dear cB diary,

I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown. After two snowdays in a row, which the district hasn't done in years, we haven't learned the rest of our routine and the performance is TOMORROW. Not that it matters, or anything, because I probably won't get to perform anyway. My partner backed out, John backed out, and that bitch Brittany wants to back out because she's in love with John. Our entire routine has fallen apart because the club is full of undedicated members who aren't even willing to put forth the effort to try. John probably just has his panties in a bunch because he didn't get to teach us the routine himself. He doesn't realize that he has an utter lack of dancing/rhythmic ability.

I worked my ass off for nothing.

[*Kathleen*]

Dear createBlog Diary,

Wow.. it's been awhile, eh? I came across a stack of old pictures when I was cleaning my room a few nights ago. There were some from prom.. the Social Distortion show.. and then I came across ninth grade photos. I laughed when I saw the one picture of me sitting at my computer in Newspaper.. sure enough, the familiar pale blue forums were emanating from the screen!

Three years, and I'm still here. Wow. I don't think I ever could have imagined how big of an impact you'd have on my life.. how thankful I would be three years later for how many people you've brought into my life. Crazy.

Until next time.

[angelrevelation]

Dear Cb Diary,

there's too much to think about at once... the academy essays which are due like crazy soon, the teacher recommendations, whether to go to the camp or to her 16th, normal hw and tests...

[tokyo-rose]

Dear diary,

Today was friggin' awesome. I loved it.
And now it's midwinter break! :DDD

[Jane Doe.]

.

I feel exceedingly lonely tonight. It's not really that much different than any other night, but in my head, it's moons different. Just.. I pushed away every friend I had years ago and rejected almost every one to come after. And those who remain or came after and stayed, well, I depend on. I can't stand being so lonely but hate that I go to a select few and they're not there--I hate that feeling I get, and that it even exists. Hell, I can't even talk to them like I'd want to anyway. Should I just walk into a crowded place where those my age (preferably older) hang around and just start talking and hope I stop before coming off as garrulous and insane? Yeah, no. That would probably induce a panic attack, a shot in the ass and a free ride to the hospital.
I kind of wish I had childhood ties.. you know, the friends who've been there since you were a kid and you completely trust. Well, I have one, but he'll be so far away soon--and is now, actually--it.. hurts. I have NO idea where to begin or where to look. Get out more, yes, but where? Be open, okay. Don't be so defensive or offensive, be cute and almost witty and charming. Let them in, yes. I can meet others, sure. But that feeling of trusting someone completely and not being able to take one step before seeing them is just.. not going to be there for years to come, if at all. I just don't know if I can hold out hope for so long. And with whom? Or will it be a new group who takes me under their wing? I need to stop thinking, feeling and panicking and just do my work and move on, move forward. I really, really need to. I was doing so well with the former, at least, and getting to the latter. I need to get my ass in gear. Need need need.

[breakingdawn]

Dear cB diary,

I don't understand why she considers me her best friend. She should have gotten the clue after the note I wrote her. I guess not. I just don't like her. She knows how I act with MY best friends, and then she sees how I don't act like that with her, and she still doesn't get it. At the same time I feel bad because she doesn't have anyone to fall back on, but why should I compromise my happiness to make her happy? Right. Ugh. Well, I'm going to a new school next year. I'm going to take it as an opportunity to leave my past...in the past. I hope she doesn't take it as an opportunity to get together more often. Oh that would suck. I'm tired of pretending to be her friend, and I guess in the end I'm just going to end up hurting her... but there's only four more months of the school year... *sigh* I'll figure something out.

[TheSilenceInDict...]

cB Diary -

I am absolutely in love with her, even when her obsession over this very entity shines through during moments I would naturally expect to be in place of - allow me to explain. Just the other day, while falling asleep on me, she surrendered to the uncontrolled release of words while induced by a sleep-drunken stupor. One (the ever-trying and loving boyfriend) would hope that such slurred words would be those expressing her affection towards him, but this wasn't the case. No, I actually got quite a laugh from what was spoken instead. To my surprise, she started mouthing gibberish about avatars and banners on this very forum! Even after having awoken, confirming what she had just said with me, and then apologizing profusely, I just couldn't stop laughing. Ah, the sweet prod of irony that lethargy chose to deliver.
I know she loves me to death, but I didn't know that I was pitted in a neck-to-neck race with CreateBlog. But hey, better CB than Johnny Depp, Jared Leto, Ryan Gosling or any of those other hunks. Love you, hun!

[tokyo-rose]

Diary,

Can't freaking wait for Tuesday.

[voguelove]

- gah, i cannot stop thinking about him. i dont care if he is a year younger than me..i just...ADORE him.

ill see him tomorrow.. =]

[minioligo]

I am so exhausted.
*Raises hand*
Break, please? (: Thank you.

[lalalaLANUH]

we'll make you love us and let the blossoms grow
to strike hearts filled with bitter jealousy
the buds cant control themselves
originality burns through their selves
red brings back aching memories
buried under petal shaped pills
you'll find us later unable to express
flowers were just another way to try and impress

i'm back at cB.
it's mid winter break.
i wont be doing much this week.
it's already wednesday.