bloodrayne, the movie Options

[sadolakced acid]

have you ever seen it?

hope you haven't

first off- the acting is terrible. michelle rodriguez is the best actor in the film. and she's not all to convincing.

half the characters sound like automated NPCs from a video game. i mean, how monotone can you possiblly say "we're going to die"?

then there's the whole softcore porno. seeminly they're unable to get people to watch through the regular stuff, you know, real storylines, good acting. i mean, come on... i don't need to see 5 minutes of a sex scene. a repetitive sex scene. and no one is sneaking up on them to kill them with a sword or something.

that's what i get for watching the director's cut, i guess.

and then.

there must be about 20 mintues total of shots of people riding horses. just... riding. horses. next to cliffs.

i mean, come on! even mansquito was better that this.
even underworld evolution was better than this. at least in that, the vampire is hot. and has guns.

i mean, this movie just... sucks.

i liked resident evil. so i know that movies can be made off of video games.

but this is just ridiculus...

i mean, when you watch something like raptor island, you can make fun of it and have a nice time.

but this? i mean... video games have better actors. and by video games i mean pacman.

the fight scenes suck. they have never heard of wires, apparently. or having a fight scene where the people do more than dodge. or more realistic blood. or having people get stabbed somewhere besides the mouth because that's the cheapest place to put a fake sword.

the sword props are punched out of sheet metal. i could make better ones.

but possibly the greatest atrocity of all is the length. how can you make such a bad movie last so long?