Tritina, Tanka, Haiku, Ode, Pantoum..., School poems Options

[Paradox of Life]

I wrote a few poems for school and thought I should put them up for critique/commentary.

Tritina
(A tritina is a repetitive poem that uses the same last words in 3 line stanzas in a 123, 132, 231 pattern and a one sentence envoy which contains all 3 words)

Wait and Cry Until It's Over

I feel the illness spreading over,
I want to be strong; I don't want to cry,
I just lie there and wait ... and wait...

Pain makes my insides churn and I don't want to wait,
I want my fear and misery to just be over,
It feels like needles in my skin; I don't want to cry.

"Take this away," from my bed I cry,
My mother sits beside me; we pray and we wait,
She holds me and says, "Dear, your pain will be over."

As life slipped away, I knew my wait was over; I don't want to cry... I don't want to cry.

Pantoum
(A poem that repeats the 2nd and 4th line as the 1st and 3rd of the next)

Silent Night
Darkness is a blanket over the quiet cottage,
I remember sitting in the daisies in my night gown,
My inquisitive eyes counted each brilliant, luminous star,
The comfort of my quiet home warmed my skin.

I remember sitting in the daisies in my night gown,
The grass was deep green, sparkled with droplets of yesterday's rain,
The comfort of my home warmed my skin.
I closed my eyes and let the wind run through my hair.

The grass was deep green, sparkled with droplets of yesterday's rain,
The moon was shy and silent, an empty face in the sky,
I closed my eyes and let the wind run through my hair.
I picked off the petals of a flower, soft in my fingers, one by one.

The moon was shy and silent, an empty face in the sky,
I sighed and smiled, content and relaxed,
I picked off the petals of a flower, soft in my fingers, one by one,
He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not...

Haiku
(A poem normally about nature or emotion that follows the 5 syllable, 7 syllable, 5 syllable pattern)

Impending Showers
Clouds are dense and gray -
The air is thick and heavy -
A storm lies ahead.

Autumn Colors
Red and orange leaves -
Rustling under mild sun -
Rays of colored light.

Day and Night
The sun proudly gleams -
Before its nightly slumber -
Moon borrows sunlight.

Tanka
(A poem that has 5 lines and follows a 5 syllable, 7, 5, 7, 7 pattern)

White Magic
The snow falls softly -
White puffs drifting down to earth -
A magical sight...
Why are you so beautiful -
When winter is so lifeless?

Condemned
Sadness is a curse,
Brutally unrelenting,
Plaguing my being
With an immortal burden.
It dictates my life.

Ode
(A poem that is normally written in a dignified manner to honor something)

Ode to Puppies

Innocent souls
with big pleading eyes,
a stout little muzzle
and always active nose
wet to the touch.
Small floppy ears
that feel like velvet
against your fingers.
Short, furry legs
and soft, tiny paws
that run in the grass,
carefree and happy.
A wagging, curly tail
that waves like a flag,
"I'm happy, I'm happy!
Play with me please!"
A sweet little being,
a bundle of joy
and a joy for everyone else;
a puppy-like smile,
with tongue flopping out,
as its paws hit the ground
tripping over pebbles and shrubs
and feels no humiliation, distress or worry!

[illumineering]

The moon was shy and silent, an empty face in the sky,

That line gave me goosebumps!