Showing No Affection Options

[Im So Vain]

Well I have been going out with my boyfriend for two months now, and he never shows any affection toward me. By that I mean hugs, kisses, etc. (you know) Im kind of worried though. I mean at least a hug every now and then would be cool, but he's never (ever) really touched me once, and Im confused about it. I thought it might have something to do with the fact that Im a virgin and he's not, but I dont know. I feel so unloved. What should I do? I dont know how to tell him how I feel about that.

[*xcaitlinx*]

i don't think that you being a virgin should have anything to do with him giving you affection. maybe he's just not the kind of guy that is very "touchy-feely". i think the best thing you can do is tell him how you feel. maybe he thinks that you don't want him to touch you and kiss you and is waiting for you to tell him when you feel comfortable enough?

[Paradox of Life]

Put simply, he's losing interest in you. He cares less about what you think about him, so he doesn't feel a need to hug or kiss you. How do you fix that? Invite him out to dinner. Surprise him. Give him a gift. Just wake him up, so he really knows what's up.

[*iNyCxShoRT*]

Perhaps he's not the touchy type. Well if he doesn't show affection, then you should start. Maybe he's afraid? If you want you can talk to him about it, or surprise him with a hug.

[*xcaitlinx*]

Put simply, he's losing interest in you. He cares less about what you think about him, so he doesn't feel a need to hug or kiss you. How do you fix that? Invite him out to dinner. Surprise him. Give him a gift. Just wake him up, so he really knows what's up.

i don't think you can automatically assume that he's not interested in her. she never said that he stopped showing her affection, but that he never has.

[xXMomoBubbleTeaX...]

Okayyy.. that is the weirdest relationship I've heard of.. You guys are going out but he's not showing you any affection.. that doesn't make sense.. the whole point of going out with someone.. is being on a different relationship level of the opposite sex that you don't do with anyone else whose the opposite sex.. or really what's the point of going out.. I don't mean like yeahh you guys are suppose to make out && then go have sex.. I'm jusst saying a hugg everyday is like required.. && if he's shy then maybe a peck on the cheek if he can't do it on the lips.. but yeahh are you in public? like thats the only reason why I think he might not showing any affection b/c that really doesn't make sense to me.. I used to show absolutely NO PDA.. when I had a boyfriend.. but now the PDA is like all over the place.. b/c I feel like I'm in love, but idk.. maybe it's a strong like.. all I kno is I go by the words of my trusty gym teacher.. "Guys are all asses till they're in there mid 20's so the hell with them && do with them what they want to do with you && just use them".. Let's just say he's British && he's about the coolest gym teacher b/c he passes everyone.. even when everyone fails his tests!!..

[Im So Vain]

i don't think that you being a virgin should have anything to do with him giving you affection. maybe he's just not the kind of guy that is very "touchy-feely". i think the best thing you can do is tell him how you feel. maybe he thinks that you don't want him to touch you and kiss you and is waiting for you to tell him when you feel comfortable enough?

Thanks that's some really good advice. Guess I have to tell him how I feel.

Perhaps he's not the touchy type. Well if he doesn't show affection, then you should start. Maybe he's afraid? If you want you can talk to him about it, or surprise him with a hug.

Yeah that could be true. This may sound odd but if I could I would hella want to meet some of his ex's to ask if he was the same way with them, when they were together. So I dont feel like Im the only one. But that's weird. Just a thought though.

[pinayprincess]

same here; well its about to be our 6th month together [in the end of april 4] & hes acting arggg.... he acts like he doesnt care anymore.... idc how he feels sometimes , so i let it be til something stupid happens..

[Hiphop d[-_-]b]

Put simply, he's losing interest in you. He cares less about what you think about him, so he doesn't feel a need to hug or kiss you. How do you fix that? Invite him out to dinner. Surprise him. Give him a gift. Just wake him up, so he really knows what's up.

Uhhh .... I disagree with that.

He probably doesn't know whether or not it's alright if he can make moves on you, so he ends up getting nervous and not doing anything. My friend Saraya's boyfriend was like that the first time he ever met her, he wouldn't do anything with her for a while because he respected her too much and wanted her to be very very sure of what she was doing with him. All the while Saraya was also thinking "Wtf ? Why aint this boy kissin' me and huggin' me and whatnot ?" And it turned out he didn't want her to think he was pressuring her into doing anything she wasn't ready for.

I think that's what he might be doing with you. Just either ask him about it, or make a move on him. Pucker up those lips and let him see a lil' but of what he was missin (:

[Im So Vain]

b' date='Mar 12 2006, 9:21 PM' post='1944471']
Uhhh .... I disagree with that.

He probably doesn't know whether or not it's alright if he can make moves on you, so he ends up getting nervous and not doing anything. My friend Saraya's boyfriend was like that the first time he ever met her, he wouldn't do anything with her for a while because he respected her too much and wanted her to be very very sure of what she was doing with him. All the while Saraya was also thinking "Wtf ? Why aint this boy kissin' me and huggin' me and whatnot ?" And it turned out he didn't want her to think he was pressuring her into doing anything she wasn't ready for.

I think that's what he might be doing with you. Just either ask him about it, or make a move on him. Pucker up those lips and let him see a lil' but of what he was missin (:

Yeah I see what you mean. I think my bf is like your friend's, but that's not cool though. Im hella gonna talk to him about that too. I guess Im gonna have to be the bigger person and make the move. Thanks for the advice Bella. It helped. Taking things slow sucks.

[topsyturvy]

Perhaps he's not the touchy type. Well if he doesn't show affection, then you should start. Maybe he's afraid? If you want you can talk to him about it, or surprise him with a hug.

Agreed

If he won't start getting cuddly, then why not you start. Next time you hang out, walk up to him and hug him. See how he reacts.

If he's surprised, maybe he just isn't the cuddly type.

If he's surprised then pleased, then he was probably just afraid.

[Paradox of Life]

b' date='Mar 12 2006, 11:21 PM' post='1944471']
Uhhh .... I disagree with that.

He probably doesn't know whether or not it's alright if he can make moves on you, so he ends up getting nervous and not doing anything. My friend Saraya's boyfriend was like that the first time he ever met her, he wouldn't do anything with her for a while because he respected her too much and wanted her to be very very sure of what she was doing with him. All the while Saraya was also thinking "Wtf ? Why aint this boy kissin' me and huggin' me and whatnot ?" And it turned out he didn't want her to think he was pressuring her into doing anything she wasn't ready for.

I think that's what he might be doing with you. Just either ask him about it, or make a move on him. Pucker up those lips and let him see a lil' but of what he was missin (:

Yeh. That's true. What I mean in 'losing interest' is not as direct and harsh as it sounds. It's something in the back of your mind, you know? When you don't feel like you need to impress anyone and you just kind of chill from the 'up-close and personal' relationship and just act like you're friends with the person.

[NoSex]

Yeah I see what you mean. I think my bf is like your friend's, but that's not cool though. Im hella gonna talk to him about that too. I guess Im gonna have to be the bigger person and make the move. Thanks for the advice Bella. It helped. Taking things slow sucks.

What isn't cool about it?
Talk to him? Maybe he needs to talk to you.
Be the bigger person and make the move? So, you were waiting for him to do it the entire time, as if it were his responsibility? Maybe he feels that he is lacking affection from you. Maybe he respects your space and doesn't want to offend you, ever.
Taking things slow sucks? I don't really agree, but stop whinning and do something about it.

You have just as much control in initiated affection as he does. I mean, it is a relationship, isn't it?

[Chii]

i think you should just go for it and make the first move. if you talked to him about it, how would that sound? "hey, why aren't you touching me or kissing me?" it will probably come out wrong and different from what you really mean.

why don't you just make the first move?

[voguelove]

well, does he like you? or maybe hes just nervous?