3 of My Friends, read more and help me... |
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 Nov 22 2005, 05:52 PM
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#1
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burning inside  Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 125,556  |
okay, i have to best friends (both girls) and i found out a while back that they both like me, a lot. i don't know what to say to them without hurting one of their feelings.
and now, i was at a GSA meet for my school (i'm straight as can be) and we did these activities and i met people and got their emails, but this one guy, (name withheld) "Steve" emailed me a while back and asked me if i would go out with him, i haven't replied back since then, cause i think i would hurt his self-esteem and emotional side. HELP! |
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Nov 22 2005, 06:26 PM
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#2
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 Senior Member Group: Official Member Posts: 6,953 Joined: Oct 2004 Member No: 52,702 |
i was going to join the G.S.A but never got a change to anyway
for the guy just tell him your 110%straight..he should understand that for your best friends..you can confront them or wait for them to talk to you...you can't really do anything to make them feel better. They have to feel better all my themselves. Just hope they will understand and move on. |
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Nov 22 2005, 07:22 PM
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#3
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 Bay Area YadadaDiiiig. Group: Official Member Posts: 4,249 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,202 |
About the guy If youre straight, tell him so.
About the girls. Do you like either of them ? |
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Nov 23 2005, 03:54 PM
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#4
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burning inside Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 125,556 |
i never really have noticed, but me and my friend *Jane* we are best friends and then *Julie* we were at the gsa meet and i found out with one of my friends...
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Nov 23 2005, 04:10 PM
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#5
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Changa Group: Member Posts: 53 Joined: Jul 2005 Member No: 177,785 |
well, about the guy
definitely reply "silence hurts more than words" by not replying to him, he'll be waiting anxiously for ur reply but when he realizes no reply will come, he'll be...heartbroken? idk, im straight. but yea, definitely reply um about the girls... well i was kinda in the same position but my position was slightly easier because the girl i wasnt gonna ask out was a strong christian and took it very well wen she found out the truth... my advice, is choose the one that you know and like better, thats what I did and still treat the other like u always have |
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Nov 23 2005, 05:43 PM
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#6
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c[: Group: Member Posts: 2,302 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 2,876 |
uhh...okay...tell the guy you're straight because apparently you are. i mean telling him you're straight is better than you being gay and turning him down right?!
 and as for the girls...tell them you just want to remain good friends with both of them (if you dont like any of them, but i couldn't understand what you were typing so yeahh....) 
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Nov 23 2005, 07:14 PM
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#7
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 Don't worry guys, size doesn't matter...to lesbians Group: Member Posts: 2,444 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 85,066 |
QUOTE(Hiphop d[-_-]b @ Nov 22 2005, 7:22 PM) About the guy If youre straight, tell him so. About the girls. Do you like either of them ?  plain and simple. "steve" should be strong enough to understand that not everyone has to like him back. |
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Nov 23 2005, 08:07 PM
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#8
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 179 Joined: Sep 2005 Member No: 239,555 |
who cares if it hurts him! tell her no ur not gay
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| *mipadi* |
Nov 23 2005, 09:45 PM
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#9
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Guest |
QUOTE(lilxl0ser @ Nov 23 2005, 5:43 PM) uhh...okay...tell the guy you're straight because apparently you are. Maybe the original poster is bisexual, or thinks he is bisexual. I was going to reply with the standard "Tell him you're not gay," but if Steve's proposal is even an issue, it makes me feel like maybe the original poster is bisexual. |
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Nov 24 2005, 07:43 AM
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#10
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 <3 Group: Member Posts: 3,657 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 64,493 |
if you don't like any of your bestfriends, you should just tell them instead of keeping silent about it, it's going to hurt them more.
tell 'steve' that you aren't gay |
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Nov 24 2005, 08:46 AM
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#11
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 naïvety Group: Human Posts: 1,303 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 488 |
You have to tell them you're not interested, because like richc said, silence hurts way more than words. Hurts me, anyway.
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Nov 24 2005, 08:52 AM
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#12
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 ][»hottiebheibi«][ Group: Member Posts: 44 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 220,763 |
QUOTE "silence hurts more than words" i agree.... 'coz your giving him hope as not to say a word of reply... im sure he'll accept your decision that your not what he thinks ayt??? 'bout the 2 girls.... i suggest you do nothing, 'coz you heard it only to a friend an not directly from them so why bother??? maybe they just adore you and they don't want to put the relationship on another level.... be cool and act as if you knew nothing... 'coz if your going to bring the "issue" i'll tell yah... your only ruining your friendship 'coz a friendship that took another level will never be the same again.... |
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Nov 24 2005, 09:16 AM
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#13
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 omgah_itsmaggiex=new username. Group: Member Posts: 785 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 21,467 |
QUOTE(akgoth123 @ Nov 22 2005, 5:52 PM) okay, i have to best friends (both girls) and i found out a while back that they both like me, a lot. i don't know what to say to them without hurting one of their feelings. and now, i was at a GSA meet for my school (i'm straight as can be) and we did these activities and i met people and got their emails, but this one guy, (name withheld) "Steve" emailed me a while back and asked me if i would go out with him, i haven't replied back since then, cause i think i would hurt his self-esteem and emotional side. HELP! when you said that they liked you, i was thinking that you were a girl too.  allrightyyy. if iwere you, i wouldnt go out with either. it may hurt them more together but think of how much it would just hurt one if you accepted one of the girls and not the other. after all, you cant date BOTH. 
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Nov 28 2005, 03:55 PM
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#14
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burning inside Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 125,556 |
i already have told him i was straight, but it didn't help.
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Nov 28 2005, 06:19 PM
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#15
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Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 82 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 190,340 |
Okay well I have a gay guy friend & when he likes a guy..he kinda hints on but when he finds out he's straight he is PERFECTLY okay with it...cuz he knows he cant change that & that its not that guys fault...so you should be okay in telling the guy that you are straight.
THe girls will be the hard part, however. Just try to be honest but DEFINATELY not harsh..i dunno...its hard i know..but good luck! I hope everything works out for the best! |
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Nov 28 2005, 10:06 PM
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#16
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 Jus Sweet Chocolate Group: Member Posts: 739 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 216,959 |
-well for tha guy....uhh...well u should reply, and just tell him that your not gay,if that doesn't woRk then jsut ignOre him! use the cold-shoulder. lol
-for tha girls, well...just go out with BOTH of them, it maKes thinGs alot easIer :D jk |
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Nov 28 2005, 10:12 PM
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#17
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 in the reverb chamber. Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 4,022 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 300,308 |
Honesty is the best policy. If you try to beat around the bush in this situation you will only prolong and intensify any hurt or ill feelings. Let "Steve" know your sexual orientation. Tell your female friends that you value their friendships and would never want to hurt either of them. Let them know that you are under a difficult situation at the time.
Sleep on it. Once you get your thoughts clear, be honest about them to your friends. If they are true friends, they'll understand. Just be gentle, thoughtful, and honest. Deceiving either of them, or yourself, would be a bad idea. Good luck. |
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