Ugh, I have to talk to someone about this, just give me your advice Options

[OverratedStupidi...]

Alright, so last year I liked this guy (Kevin). We started going out mid-December and broke up on February 7th. He broke up with me. It was kind of a bad break up, out of no where sort of and he told me a bunch of reasons, but none of them really made sense. Some of them were like.. he would be graduating in a year, and it would be easier to break it off then (he was a junior, I was a freshman.) He also said stuff like, track was starting for me, so we wouldn't get to see each other anymore. I mean, the reasons sounded more like he was trying to convince himself. Nonetheless, he stated that he didn't even think we could be friends.

Anyway, I never *truly* got over him. I went out with another guy, whom I liked a lot, but I never was really as interested in as I was in Kevin. During this second relationship, I had pretty much no contact with Kevin. Well I broke up with this guy over the summer and we remained friends. (that really has nothing to do with anything I guess )

Um, well then band camp started (he is now a senior, I am a sophomore). This was not a very good thing because, although it is not completely necessary for me to see him, I was friends with everyone in his section. (he plays in the pit a.k.a xylophones) All of these friends are also not in any of my other classes this year, so bad is the only time I get to see them. Well at the beginning, Kevin and I just ignored each other. Then I tried to start talking to him again.

That didn't go too well. He told everyone I was annoying and a slut.. which I have no idea where he got that from. Well anyway, he really was hurting my feelings so I stopped trying to talk to him. It's not like I was even talking to him about anything like.. annoying, just about whatever was going on, and we were usually talking in a group.

Well, I still really really liked him, but I tried to pretend I didn't. Then something really bad happened. I broke my leg. Now see, normally it wouldn't involve him, but one of my friends in his section also broke her leg on the same day, so we pretty much stayed together. Also since his section doesn't march... I was made by the directors to stay with him, considering he was the section leader.

Well, that was about 3 weeks ago. So, at the football games I've been talking to him, and it's been going pretty well, he's actually listening now. Well he told one of his freshmen that I'm really not too bad, but I shouldn't just keep trying to be his friend. Well I wasn't really trying all that hard, its just I talk to people when they are around, I'm a pretty friendly person.

Well I tried to just forget about it, and not really talk to him all that much. You have to remember that I really really like him still. Well then I was in the room with all the tubas and pit members. Well one of the tuba kids likes me and he was trying to get me to like him (hes one of those guys who always gets the girl he likes, I hate those guys) Well he started tickling me, and well, I'm pretty ticklish, so I laughed but I'm like.. dude get off of me, (remember, I can't move, my leg is broken) but he wouldn't. Well I look over to my side for some help, and all I see is Kevin, and hes giving the kid (or maybe me) a very evil/jealous look. Finally, this other tuba kid tells him to stop being a slut.

Well anyway, while my leg was broken, I learned how to play the xylophone. Well I'm pretty decent considering I've never played before. My friends in pit are telling me to try out for our drumline, but I know that Kevin will be the section leader for that. So here is my first question. I really want to do drumline, but should I try out or not?

Also, he's a senior, meaning he will graduate (I hope). So I want to tell him how I feel, but I don't want to be embarrassed. I mean, it would be better if he knew, but it would also be better if he didn't have something over me. So second question.. should I tell him? and how?


edit//

Well, I forgot to add in what happened last night. I was giving "his freshman" a hug. (He calls him his freshman because he thinks the kid is his mini me or something) Someone said that it looked like I could be his mom, so I'm like, yeah, this is my child. Well Kevin turns around and he goes, dude, thats my freshman and tries to get my hands off of him. Well he like intentionally just grabs my hand and holds it for about 5 seconds. I look up at him and he just kind of lets go and acts embarrassed.

Then, we are going to put our stuff back in the band room and I'm again in the tuba/pit room. My sister is calling me from outside the window and I'm standing there on crutches holding my stuff. Shes like... get your ass out here, and I'm like.. I can't carry this stuff, you need to help me. She just walks away and I'm like.. ugh I hate you. I didn't realize that kevin was right in front of me. He goes, what? and kind of has a sad/evil look on his face. I say, I wasn't talking to you, I don't hate you. He's like, you're just saying that, you know you hate me. I'm like.. no I really don't, and he just walks out.