f**k No Sex Before Marriage Options

[Tung]

Honestly, the people who believe in not having sex before marriage is setting themselves for a huge risk. Why you ask? You're about to marry someone you've never had sex with, and after you're married, they are going to be your sex partner for the rest of your life.

People who say sex isn't a big deal and that important in a healthy relationship are kidding themselves. There are those who have sexual chemistry, and some who just have general personality chemistry. Also, of course you can have both. What I'm saying is that, why set yourself up for a risk and marry someone you haven't sexually experienced yet? You two could be have the best relationship and get married. However, what happens after you guys get married, and your partner totally sucks at sex? You're screwed, and stuck with that person for the rest of your life, until maybe you want a divorce. But why go through all that, and deal with the financial burden of one?

Also, it's also a good thing, to live with someone you're about to marry. Again, you're going to be with your spouse for quite some time under the same roof after you're married. I've seen too many times couples who never lived with one another, get married, and move in together for the first time. They have so much problems with living with one another.

So I say, f**k the no sex before marriage rule. Have all the sex you can get in the relationship before getting married, and know what you are getting yourself into.


edit: oops posted in wrong forums. mod move to relationship plox.

[Sumiaki]

I think of it like buying a car. Must test drive.

[EddieV]

Honestly, the people who believe in not having sex before marriage is setting themselves for a huge risk. Why you ask? You're about to marry someone you've never had sex with, and after you're married, they are going to be your sex partner for the rest of your life.

People who say sex isn't a big deal and that important in a healthy relationship are kidding themselves. There are those who have sexual chemistry, and some who just have general personality chemistry. Also, of course you can have both. What I'm saying is that, why set yourself up for a risk and marry someone you haven't sexually experienced yet? You two could be have the best relationship and get married. However, what happens after you guys get married, and your partner totally sucks at sex? You're screwed, and stuck with that person for the rest of your life, until maybe you want a divorce. But why go through all that, and deal with the financial burden of one?

Also, it's also a good thing, to live with someone you're about to marry. Again, you're going to be with your spouse for quite some time under the same roof after you're married. I've seen too many times couples who never lived with one another, get married, and move in together for the first time. They have so much problems with living with one another.

So I say, f**k the no sex before marriage rule. Have all the sex you can get in the relationship before getting married, and know what you are getting yourself into.
edit: oops posted in wrong forums. mod move to relationship plox.

I'm for sex before marriage.

However just to add, when you've only had one partner, you'd think he/she is great, because that's all you have.

[S-Majere]

I was, and still am to some extent, quite taken with the idea of saving myself for marriage.

Yes, there's always the test-driving analogy, but there's a lot more to be said for choosing to show a little self-restraint.

(I'm not religious in the slightest, the idea just appeals to me)

[absinthe]

I think you'd know if you were sexually attracted to your significant other regardless of whether or not you decide to do the deed.

That being said, I'm not religious attached to the idea -- or at all for that matter. I'm just not going to jump into bed for the sake of verifying our sexual compatibility. I guess it all depends on how our relationship progresses, and how we both feel about it. Plus, I highly doubt that intelligent people in serious relationships are fickle enough to end a relationship based on mediocre performances in the bedroom. If they fail, make them better.

IMO, its special regardless of performance if you love each other.

[Just_Dream]

I'm not going to choose sides because I see totally understand why people choose to save it until they are married. People want it to be a meaningful experience, so by having your "first" with someone you're married to and who is also a virgin, it's something that only you two share with each other. You know what I mean? Of course there might be times where the marriage falls apart, but that doesn't mean saving it didn't mean anything.

Honestly, it just depends on a person's perspective of what the initiation of intercourse really means to them. I've only had 1 sexual partner in the past 5 years that I've been sexually active, and fortunately things are still going well with him. Am I married? No. Should I have saved it? Maybe. But even then, I don't think I have strong enough morals to maintain abstinence until marriage. Honestly, kudos to the couples who are in relationships lasting 5+ years and both are still virgins. It shows that there isn't a dependence on sex to keep a relationship strong, although I would have to say that they are missing out on the pleasures of sex...


EDIT - and yea sorry if my answer seems a little biased, since we all know my situation.

[datass]

agree with sulphur

[illriginal]

Honestly, the people who believe in not having sex before marriage is setting themselves for a huge risk. Why you ask? You're about to marry someone you've never had sex with, and after you're married, they are going to be your sex partner for the rest of your life.

People who say sex isn't a big deal and that important in a healthy relationship are kidding themselves. There are those who have sexual chemistry, and some who just have general personality chemistry. Also, of course you can have both. What I'm saying is that, why set yourself up for a risk and marry someone you haven't sexually experienced yet? You two could be have the best relationship and get married. However, what happens after you guys get married, and your partner totally sucks at sex? You're screwed, and stuck with that person for the rest of your life, until maybe you want a divorce. But why go through all that, and deal with the financial burden of one?

Also, it's also a good thing, to live with someone you're about to marry. Again, you're going to be with your spouse for quite some time under the same roof after you're married. I've seen too many times couples who never lived with one another, get married, and move in together for the first time. They have so much problems with living with one another.

So I say, f**k the no sex before marriage rule. Have all the sex you can get in the relationship before getting married, and know what you are getting yourself into.
edit: oops posted in wrong forums. mod move to relationship plox.

Damn son... you're straight up Americanized.

Technically speaking, sex is all about evolution. Bringing another human into this world. It's not really supposed to be used as some sort of sport or stress reliever. Even though we can look at it that way, specially when there's protection.

What exactly made you come up with this "f**k no sex before marriage" philosophy? I thought Asians in general had more morals than this. I guess it's true, that cultures are truly dying.


I also wanna add, why not just stay a virgin til' you're married?... When you have sex for the first time with your partner, it's gonna just as great for the both of you. Then you can go ahead and pick up a karma sutra book and learn new exciting moves/positions. Or even pick up on dancing for flexibility and endurance.

[stephinika]

I'm not going to choose sides because I see totally understand why people choose to save it until they are married. People want it to be a meaningful experience, so by having your "first" with someone you're married to and who is also a virgin, it's something that only you two share with each other. You know what I mean? Of course there might be times where the marriage falls apart, but that doesn't mean saving it didn't mean anything.

Honestly, it just depends on a person's perspective of what the initiation of intercourse really means to them. I've only had 1 sexual partner in the past 5 years that I've been sexually active, and fortunately things are still going well with him. Am I married? No. Should I have saved it? Maybe. But even then, I don't think I have strong enough morals to maintain abstinence until marriage. Honestly, kudos to the couples who are in relationships lasting 5+ years and both are still virgins. It shows that there isn't a dependence on sex to keep a relationship strong, although I would have to say that they are missing out on the pleasures of sex...
EDIT - and yea sorry if my answer seems a little biased, since we all know my situation.

Haha, its all good but yeah I have to say I agree with you and what Anisha said too. I'm not for premarital sex but I'm not against it either. It really depends on the people and the relationship. I think as long as you're being smart about it and being responsible, then go for it. Its the individual's own choice right? So yeh.
And I've only had one sexual partner as well and so far things are going well, so yeh. That just kinda ties in to what Christina said.

[*paperplane*]

I think there's too much emphasis on virginity. If that's the greatest "gift" I've got, then my life is f**ked.

[swishersweet]

i guess it depends on your ethics and morals..

[misoshiru]

And I've only had one sexual partner as well and so far things are going well, so yeh.

O_O but I thought you and....and..what was his name again? or I assumed. hahaha.

[Tung]

Damn son... you're straight up Americanized.

You got that right. Fuck the Vietnamese culture.

There, I said it.

Bang till your dick is sore.

[S-Majere]

Tung, did you have a bad break-up or something?

[superstitious]

Bang till your dick is sore.

... lol

I was raised Mormon and was constantly being told to wait until I married. Since I don't believe in marriage (for myself), I didn't wait (obviously). Besides, I like sex A LOT. I like sex too much to have to be married to someone in order to have it.

[Tung]

Tung, did you have a bad break-up or something?

No, I'm still in a relationship right now.

I was raised Mormon and was constantly being told to wait until I married. Since I don't believe in marriage (for myself), I didn't wait (obviously). Besides, I like sex A LOT. I like sex too much to have to be married to someone in order to have it.

You go girl! Milf status.

[illriginal]

You got that right. Fuck the Vietnamese culture.

There, I said it.

Bang till your dick is sore.

lol one of the gravest sins... to be ashame of your skin color, race/ethnicity/culture.

Good luck to ya... and your sex adventures lol

[Tung]

lol one of the gravest sins... to be ashame of your skin color, race/ethnicity/culture.

Good luck to ya... and your sex adventures lol

Sins? I'm not a believer in the whole sins and good deeds stuff. I'm an atheist. Do I ever feel guilty when I "sin"? Of course, but everyone does wrong.

My sex adventures? I never dated a Vietnamese girl, but I have had sex with them. I think my sex adventures is just fine.

[stephinika]

O_O but I thought you and....and..what was his name again? or I assumed. hahaha.

Haha, his name was Adrian and nope. Thats one of the reasons I kinda ended things...he pressured me in that direction in an awkward manner and just...yeah. I'm not going to get into it.

[illriginal]

Sins? I'm not a believer in the whole sins and good deeds stuff. I'm an atheist. Do I ever feel guilty when I "sin"? Of course, but everyone does wrong.

Yar.. I was generally speaking about being ashamed of your origins.

My sex adventures? I never dated a Vietnamese girl, but I have had sex with them. I think my sex adventures is just fine.

K

[Just_Dream]

Damn son... you're straight up Americanized.

Technically speaking, sex is all about evolution. Bringing another human into this world. It's not really supposed to be used as some sort of sport or stress reliever. Even though we can look at it that way, specially when there's protection.

You're undermining the emotional aspect of sex. So you would HAVE SEX to give birth? That's taking away pleasures from it. That's like telling a person to read a book for a class, and not enjoy it. That they should only read the book during that class, and ONLY IF they are taking that class. And sex is all about evolution? LMAO. Darwinism is evolution. Let's not bring science into this. It may "not be" a stress reliever or a sport, but why tell people it cannot be? If it's something someone enjoys, no one should inhibit it. I'd much rather enjoy having sex than knowing that I have to have sex ONLY to conceive a child, kthx.

I thought Asians in general had more morals than this.

LULZ WUT? Don't stereotype us. We have morals, but it doesn't mean we're SO DIFFERENT that we can't have pre-marital sex. Oh yea and I bet you'd also say that homosexuality shouldn't happen in Asian cultures because Asians in general had more morals than this. Oh yes and Americans are so goddamn sex crazed, they have less morality! Honestly, I'm not trying to undermine those who believe in sex AFTER marriage - it's all sweet and dandy that they choose to do so, but I dislike biased views that undermine the enjoyment of sexual pleasure.

As for being Americanized... well some (or many) of us are ________ - American. Except Steph. She's like, Asian-Hispanic-Canadian. <333 lol this could be moved to debate, BUT the topic title sucks. :P

[brooklyneast05]

I thought Asians in general had more morals than this.

LULZ WUT?

x2

[illriginal]

You're undermining the emotional aspect of sex. So you would HAVE SEX to give birth? That's taking away pleasures from it. That's like telling a person to read a book for a class, and not enjoy it. That they should only read the book during that class, and ONLY IF they are taking that class. And sex is all about evolution? LMAO. Darwinism is evolution. Let's not bring science into this. It may "not be" a stress reliever or a sport, but why tell people it cannot be? If it's something someone enjoys, no one should inhibit it. I'd much rather enjoy having sex than knowing that I have to have sex ONLY to conceive a child, kthx.
LULZ WUT? Don't stereotype us. We have morals, but it doesn't mean we're SO DIFFERENT that we can't have pre-marital sex. Oh yea and I bet you'd also say that homosexuality shouldn't happen in Asian cultures because Asians in general had more morals than this. Oh yes and Americans are so goddamn sex crazed, they have less morality! Honestly, I'm not trying to undermine those who believe in sex AFTER marriage - it's all sweet and dandy that they choose to do so, but I dislike biased views that undermine the enjoyment of sexual pleasure.

As for being Americanized... well some (or many) of us are ________ - American. Except Steph. She's like, Asian-Hispanic-Canadian. <333 lol this could be moved to debate, BUT the topic title sucks. :P

I would actually bother to even give this a chance in debating this with you and actually destroy your post. But I much rather just sit back and laugh at this nonsense. Though it would be a waste of time in the first place, tryin to debate with American-(ized) youngsters.

[queen]

i'm too lazy to type out my whole argument, so i'll just say i agree with agiri's and just dream's posts.

[brooklyneast05]

DING DING,
Christina WINS