When did my life turn in to late night Hollyoaks? Options

[The-Mach-Hare]

OK. The names in this story are falsified, as many of my friends do not come off well here, and would probably not really apprecaite this if they ever discovered it, but hell, it's kind of too good not to tell, and envolves too many people not to use names, or it just won't make sense.

SO.

Yesterday was the last day of the exam period, and basically the entire university went out into town to party and blow off some steam. My friends and I planned on going out to a couple of bars, have some fun, whatever. My friend Lauren's ex-boyfriend, who she hasn't seen in person for about 5 years but has spoken to on MSN and stuff is up in Nottingham staying with his cousin, and they ended up coming over and going out with us, so we were getting drunk at this girl Vicki's, and got a cab into town about midnight, got to the bar, kept drinking, we're all a little bit far gone by this point.

Eventually we move on to somewhere else, and when that closes, we're thinking about moving on to a casino, so we walk up the road, and when we're outside, it turns out I'm the only one who's actually a member, but it's free to join, so I let everyone else start registering and head on in. Allie and Vicki get in and go to the bathroom or whatever, and then i'm waiting for the others for forever, so I go back to the lobby, and see that Rob, Lauren's ex, is having a fight with the bouncer, and his cousin Mark ad my friend Jake are having to restrain him while he tries to have another go at him, with Lauren shrieking like a banshee at everyone and their dog to calm down. Eventualy they all get thrown out, so I follow, and Rob has reached the stage of drunkenness when he has decided to weep briefly while complaining about the bouncer and refusing to move on.

There is a taxi rank right outside, so I tell Mark and Jake to get in a taxi and take Rob and Lauren home, as I can go back in and get the girls and follow on. However, Jake, being not so sober himself, somehow comes to the conclusion that allowing me to go back into the casino myself would in fact cause more danger than allowing Rob to continue on his rampage. SO we argue for about five minutes while Rob yells at passers-by, Mark restrains him occasionally, and Lauren goes into complete hysterics and starts sobbing on my shoulder. Eventually some of our friends walk by on their way home, so we put Lauren in a taxi with them, and are left outside.

By this point, we've walked round the corner to find a place for Jake to pee, and the police end up pulling up saying they've had reports of a disturbance outside the casino, and take Rob into the van and put him under arrest. He doesn't know anyone in the area, so I got ahold of one of the cops and gave them my number for him to call when things got sorted out so he could tell us where the hell he got to, but Jake decides it would be appropriate to try and talk the police out of arresting Rob, who at this point is having a complete spaz-out at the cops in the van. Mark and I decide to intervene, as it appears Jake is in danger of joining Rob in the van, and somehow, we end up with both of them free, at which point I discover that none of us have any money, and so we head off to get some cash out to get a taxi home, completely forgetting Allie and Vicki, and then, a second police van drives past, and Rob decides that it's a good idea to flag them down and demand to make a formal complaint about the behaviour of the FIRST set of cops.

Basically, this ends with Mark having to give a false ID number of the van to the officer at whom Rob was bellowing in order to placate the latter, while I quietly explain to his partner that it had been a long night, very sorry, going home now, you know, general 'please do not arrest this person again as it will most definitely be tiresome for all concerned and we're taking him home anyway,' type stuff.

Get the taxi home, it's now about 5 in the morning, and the buses haven't started yet for Mark to take Rob to the train station and send him far far away, so we take him to my room, where he promptly passes out on my bed. I'm like, whatever, at least he's not causing hassle this way, and I call Lauren to tell her it's OK, blah blah blah, and she asks where Allie and Vicki are, so Jake and I are like, shit, we forgot, but Jake has left his phone and cigarettes at Vicki's, so I walk round to her building, which is like, next to mine, and yell up to her window to throw stuff down to me, and when she answers her and and Allie are up there with two randomers they've brought back from the casino. She throws down the cigarettes, and I go back to mine, and being slightly drunk myself decide to have a MASSIVE argument with Jake about how shittily he dealt with the police.

So we go at it for about half an hour, then end up having a deep meaningful discussion about the meaning of life or whatever, and start drinking some more. We go back into my room (having been in the lobby of my building)and Mark has fallen asleep as well. We realize that Rob can get to the station by this time, but for the life of us we can't wake them up, so we call Lauren to come over and try, her solution being to bang two pots together loudly and sing obnoxious songs. SO they eventually get up, we get Rob on the bus with Mark, and they leave my life for the forseeable future. At this point, Jake is demanding his phone, and so I end up calling Vicki to wake her up so we can go and get it, and it turns out that she has answered the phone during sex with one of the random casino men, and so I hang up, and we wonder what happened to Allie, so we go to her's to get some of Lauren's stuff, because she and Jake live in the same building, so he could let us in. Her door is slightly open, so Lauren taps on the door and sticks her head in, withdrawing it quickly on discovery that she is asleep with the second of the randomers. We're all jus tpretty whatever at this point, and so Jake heads to bed, and I walk Lauren to hers. Halfway back, we realize that it is about 8 by this point, and SHIT ALLIE'S MOTHER IS ARRIVING AT 9 AND ALLIE IS IN BED WITH A RANDOM GUY. We decide that this is amusing and not to wake her, so yeah, all to bed.

I get a phone call at 3 this afternoon waking me up, it's Vicki asking me if she came the window naked last night, and that she is extremely sore downstairs, and can't remember what she did in what position, those being her exact terms. I asked if she knew what happened with the whole Allie debacle, but she didn't, so I still have that to look forward to.

ANyway, the point of this, other than being amusing, is have you ever experienced something that at the time was a really unpleasant general experience, but in retrospect was f**king hilariously funny and entertaining? I love drama.

[Simba]

not enough bad grammar and typos

[Elba]

Too long for me to care to read.

[The-Mach-Hare]

If I could, Arjuna, I'd change your password to getthehelloverit.

[Reidar]

ALLIE IS IN BED WITH A RANDOM GUY. We decide that this is amusing and not to wake her, so yeah, all to bed.

Was she drunk?

[The-Mach-Hare]

Was she drunk?

Nope, completely and utterly sober.

[Reidar]

Sounds like a classy bunch.

[The-Mach-Hare]

I have a knack for sharing my drunken shenanigans. It makes me feel more confident and above others who can't drink.

[The-March-Hare]

*shrug*

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