how do you know your in love..... Options

[stanzaonthewall]

how do you know your in love....I've been questioning this for a long time now...not that i think i'm in love...i just don't want to get smacked in the face when it happens...it shouldn't be a surpise though...did you know there are different types of love....i learned about that in a psychology class...which one might you be experiencing

Sternberg's triagular theory of love...involves three main qualities
1.intamacy...this doesn't refer to sex in refers to the bond that you have formed with the other person...your giving and receiving, understanding,communication,support
2. Passion...the sexuality, romance,chemistry
3.commitment...long term or short term

These combine together to show different patterns of love

Pattern Passion Intimacy Commitment
Infatuation Yes No No
(obsession)
Affectionate No Yes Yes
(Companion)
Fatuous Yes No Yes
(worship from distance)
Consummate Yes Yes Yes
(complete)
Non-Love No No No
(stranger)
Liking No Yes No
(friendship)
Romantic Yes Yes No

Empty Love No No Yes
(an arranged marriage)

this is just a chart though...i know i shouldn't base love on this but it's a neat way of looking at it...you can even look at it to compare if you really love some of your friends...

there's no way love is a single concept... there are plenting of studies on how people love and how to have the best type of love...it all depends on what kind of tiem you want to putinto a relationship i guess

well comment away...What kind of love do you think you have with your closest person

[*This Confession*]

Yea its a neat way to look at it I suppose.

I also had a post a while ago
about the different types of love.

Eh i didn't read all your post, I'll have to post more soon. There isn't just one thing that brings up how love forms, its your relationship with someone and how you get to know then and how well you know them, and if you share commen interest.

Puppy love

Characteristically defined by age, the term "puppy love" came from how a person typically feels toward a puppy. It's quite common to have these feelings for a teacher, a friend's parent, etc. These feelings don't usually last very long but should be enjoyed while they are felt.

Unrequited love

Unrequited love is a love that is given, but not received. This can be quite painful, but is a part of growing up. It is important to be respectful of the person who does not return these feelings of affection and be mindful of their wishes.

Co-dependent love

Being co-dependent, spending all your time with someone, feeling like you can't live without them and basing your self worth on what that person thinks of you, is not love. You need to be able to be your own person, independent of them. I think that's why most people don't really fall in love until they are older. You have to know who you are first.

True love

That perfect, magical balance between you and them. The feeling that you are whole as a person, by yourself and more with that special someone.

Parent-child love

I think that this form of love is the most perfect and the most pure. It does not compare to anything I've ever felt. I remember when I was younger and dreaming about the day I would have kids. I was always worried about what if I had more than one. Wouldn't you always have a special place in your heart for your first? Could you love the second and third the same as the first? I was afraid that the love I felt would be cut in half or in thirds. But something wonderful happened. It doubled. And tripled. I am overwhelmed with all the emotion.

Lust

Feelings driven primarily by sexual longing.

Friendship love

You know what I'm talking about. The friends you can tell anything to. The ones you cover for when they're in trouble.

[_sarcastic_]

mine is probably either Romantic or Consummate.

[*yrrnotelekktric*]

...you just know i guess,

[*T0rmented_Soul*]

uhmm intimacy and passion

[goodcharlotte]

My sister always said that you were in love when you could communicate without having to talk and you could get high of their natural scent. I don't know but I guess she would though.

[iROCKYOURSOCKS]

well you will know when you are in love.

i think almost everybody has a diffrent definition of what love is so i really dont know what to tell ya.

[*xcaitlinx*]

mine is consummate (complete)...you know you're in love when you can't stop thinking about hte other person, you miss them even if it's only been a few minutes that you haven't seen them, you love everything about them [even their flaws], and you can't picture yourself with anyone else...ever.

[lyin_in_wait]

i believe if you have to ask yourself if your in love then you arent in love. love is something you cant explain. its weird but its true. there is no list that you check off or theres no quiz to tell you if you are in love or lust...you just know

[blacknailpolish]

So many times younger people think theyre in love because they have strong feelings for a person but then when the passion fades they realize they aren't really in love, they just liked the person a lot. I haven't fallen in love for real yet, so I can't really say how you know.

[Just2Fresh]

Love doesnt need science or some scientest telling you what love really is. Thats a bunch of bull to me. How do you know your in love? You just do. Its an unexplainable feeling you have for a person that you've never had for any other person. Its something that stays with you even when you dont want it to be there. Love has no time. It just happens. It last forever though, always with you. Though it may fade, it will always be there.

[*Uronacid*]

Love is simpley doing what's best for someone. I have been studying and thinking about the topic of love for a long time... let me ask you something:

Is there ever a time when breaking up with someone is accually loving them?

[Just2Fresh]

Yes. Because sometimes you have to let go to do whats best for them.

[*Uronacid*]

Yes. Because sometimes you have to let go to do whats best for them.

Yes, think of a situation.... I have some that I came up with... but I want to see what other people think...

[Listelle]

Yes, think of a situation.... I have some that I came up with... but I want to see what other people think...

I believe sometimes letting go is the greatest act of love.

This one is very cliche, but say a dream opportunity opened up for her. It might be an internship in France or a full ride to Harvard Law. You both know that this is what she's always wanted. But you both know that if she takes the opportunity she'll be too busy/distracted/far away for the relationship to continue. Gently letting her go so she can pursue this chance will ease the guilt on her behalf.

And being in love is a crazy thing. You can't really tell, one day you'll wake up and it'll slap you in the face. That you're in love.

P.S. To uronacid: I never got a chance to thank you and Holly for your advice on jealousy issues. I appreciated it very much. Results coming in soon. :)

[*Uronacid*]

I believe sometimes letting go is the greatest act of love.

This one is very cliche, but say a dream opportunity opened up for her. It might be an internship in France or a full ride to Harvard Law. You both know that this is what she's always wanted. But you both know that if she takes the opportunity she'll be too busy/distracted/far away for the relationship to continue. Gently letting her go so she can pursue this chance will ease the guilt on her behalf.

And being in love is a crazy thing. You can't really tell, one day you'll wake up and it'll slap you in the face. That you're in love.

P.S. To uronacid: I never got a chance to thank you and Holly for your advice on jealousy issues. I appreciated it very much. Results coming in soon. :)

Exactly, letting go of your own selfish wants to let someone persue the chance of a life time is a great example. Sometimes people can be so blinded by their own wants and desires that they forget about whats best for others.

Giving up on things is one of the greatest things you can do when you love someone. Love is selfless.

See if you guys can think of more!



P.S. Any time :]... I'll Holly to check out your post.

[PrincessAda]

I guess when you feel like that person is the one you wanna be with through thick&&thin.

[*mipadi*]

Oh, you'll know.

[Aerjae]

For me, I knew that I was in love, I just didn't want to accept it... I was just living in denial. It was the greatest feeling ever!! I guess you just know when love comes your way.