Release. Options

[*My Cinderella.*]

You speak, but your words ram together like a car crash
I try to hold my mind but my feelings can't be stashed
With every passing second, the room spins more and more
And I begin to wonder when I'll be through that door
The point of no return and the point of no escape
I grab a handful of my hair and my latest mixtape
Shoving the tape into the player, I sink into my santurary
My heart, an emotionless organ, too heavy for me to carry
Oh, look my deary, our story has been brought to this poem
I wish so much that we can return to this place we call home
But much has changed for you have said that you call me a stranger
I hope to not that I may be your one and only danger
Forgive me, you are the emptiness in my soul
Without you, my heart is beckons with a black hole.

[Ekay]

this one is a tad bit confusing. it jumps around from topic to topic, and much like me before (and perhaps still) is that you tried a little bit too hard to keep the rhyme going that you weren't really focused on telling the story. sorry if i sound harsh though =/

[*My Cinderella.*]

Haha, it's alright. It was more like one of those *takes a pen and scribbles because she's so mad* things.

[Ekay]

hahah, yeah..i've had those moments. not necessarily proud of them. but tweak and work with this one a bit. think of it like a diamond in the rough :D

[mono_logue]

nice release
i release by writing as well, heh

[MrStrife]

A lot of ideas stirring but feeling like you have the urge to let it out. Woooo sahhhhhhh

[*jayen*]

I like this, it's a good example of a stream of conciousness writing; you write whatever you feel at any time it comes up, unorganized in an artistic manner.