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engaged, stupid to stay?
toki
post Jan 27 2005, 10:45 PM
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would u stay with a guy that has previously been engaged and still talks with that person? and u are at a young age as well as him..

also would u believe him that he only loves you?

u = 17
he = 20
 
Chii
post Jan 27 2005, 10:50 PM
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i would believe that...it's okay for ex fiances to stay friends, i'd get pretty jealous if i were you but their relationship is in his past, if he's only 3 years older, it won't make a difference
 
lovescream
post Jan 27 2005, 10:54 PM
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It depends how he acts around you, how often he's around you, and how he treats you. =]
 
toki
post Jan 27 2005, 11:00 PM
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well he is very controlling.
ex: i was at a party and he got freaked out and made me go home..i told him to trust me and that i wasnt gonna drive or "do things" though he hit me back wid this comment "its not you i dont trust its the guys and the ppl around you".
hes also very sexist in the way of boys will be boys and girls should be girls..so girls must listen to the boys kind of thing..and the guy is mainly almost right..and if not then the girl should listen neways kind of vibe...
hmms but never the less im in love with the guy..although i myself feel kinda mistreated i still believe he does it in a caring way?
i dunno. its hard to explain..maybe its possible that i could be too caught up in love rather than reality of things? im not quite shur yet..its been 4 months but feels like 4 years. my friends all hate him and tell me hes no good...my bro which is one of the most important part of my family...(i have a shietty family relationship) tells me hes no good either..he says he HATES him and wants me to break up...and he tells me that all the bf i ever had does not sum up to the bad things he has done to me..
 
Shattered_Hope
post Jan 27 2005, 11:01 PM
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if the guy used to be engaged and now is not...I dont think..or know of any reason why they would still be "talking" to each other...err....normally...if a couple reach that far in a relationship they just stop talking altogether if it doesnt work out..another thing is that he used to be engaged with her..that means that they were once in love...christ..the guy's three years older than you too...I dont know..I dont think you should stay with him..but if you want and love and need him that much..then go for it.. happy.gif
 
pinayprincess
post Jan 27 2005, 11:07 PM
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ahhh thats tough, i would trust him, wel thats one reason y we go out with our guys is to trust, nd tot remember that he is going fo me not her ...so i wouldnt mind..but i mean if hes seeing her too much..man ill go wild haha [[if that ever happened to me]]
 
toki
post Jan 27 2005, 11:14 PM
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interesting.
well the thing is..i've found some of her sites..lol im not a stalker..but i mean..i do get curious so i cant help but to look for them?
neways..
well i've seen on he xanga things like "o i love him" blah blah blah...and how shes so in love wid the guy as if they are still together..i asked him if they were and he told me yes/no...yes because of complications that i wasnt quite told about..but then hes like "trust me i love YOU"...

so in other words..hes engaged to his girl and technically still sorting some stuff out wid her..yet hes wid me..and she dunno but i think she kinda does (what i mean by this is that he hasnt told her about it but i think she suspects it).
 
Wishful Thinking
post Jan 28 2005, 12:41 AM
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i am so sorry to say this.. but i think he might be cheating on you.. you'd never know =/ he doesn't trust you enough so he has to go, "Trust me I love YOU" so yeahs... sometimes you should trust your friends and family.. they may know things you don't.. =/ if he's mistreating you, he might not be the one for you... _unsure.gif
 
xlitoxb
post Jan 28 2005, 01:21 AM
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What 'Wishful Thinking' said could be true.. >_< Other than that I think you could be infatuated with him. Meaning that you think and believe that you love him.. when deep, deep down.. you're still not quite sure. =\ ehh.. I seriously don't know what I would do in your shoes.. So sorrie I doubted that helped at all .. =[
 
Outloved
post Jan 28 2005, 03:53 AM
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That's a toughy. I'm sorry to say this but I don't think your relationship with him will work out. You guys need more trust in each other. Maybe you guys should talk, and let him tell you the truth and answer all your questions that's been bothering you. It's just honesty and trust. _smile.gif
 
Chii
post Jan 28 2005, 11:57 AM
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QUOTE(toki @ Jan 27 2005, 11:14 PM)
so in other words..hes engaged to his girl and technically still sorting some stuff out wid her..yet hes wid me..and she dunno but i think she kinda does (what i mean by this is that he hasnt told her about it but i think she suspects it).
*

what? if he's still engaged to her then you really shouldn't be with him...he could just be playing you for all you know...if he really loved you, both of you should wait until all the stuff is sorted out

he seems a little too controlling...i'm pretty sure i've been there before...when you know you should get out but at the same time you can't because you believe that you love him so much...

look at it this way, if he really loved you, would you feel mistreated? if he really loved you, wouldn't he trust you? plus, if he really loved you, wouldn't he listen to your point of view on things instead of believing in that guys are always right? and the biggest thing...if he really loved you, why is he still engaged?

leave him as soon as you can...the longer you stay with him the more it's going to hurt sad.gif
 
cmgchica717
post Jan 28 2005, 12:34 PM
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WHAT THE HECK. He is engaged to another chick and you still want to be with him. That is just not right. But you are kinda retarded for wanting to be with him when he does not even know what he wants himself. Leave him.
 
sweetdreamsx3
post Jan 28 2005, 05:48 PM
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Personally, I wouldn't stay with a guy who keeps talking about his ex that he's been engaged to. He's with you now, correct? Tell his dumbass to quit talking about other girls.
 
gnawxela
post Jan 28 2005, 09:07 PM
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i think you should just give it up, their engagement is over right? but why is she still talking like they're together...is it CONFIRMED that they're over?
i guess the decision really depends on if you wanna get really really hurt or not, if your bro even says to not stay with him, then you should listen to ur bro. he loves you no matter what and he wouldnt lie to you about something like this
 
yukichan
post Jan 28 2005, 10:12 PM
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QUOTE(Wishful Thinking @ Jan 27 2005, 7:41 PM)
i am so sorry to say this.. but i think he might be cheating on you.. you'd never know =/  he doesn't trust you enough so he has to go, "Trust me I love YOU" so yeahs... sometimes you should trust your friends and family.. they may know things you don't.. =/  if he's mistreating you, he might not be the one for you...  _unsure.gif
*


yup i agree...
 
lilJdawg
post Jan 29 2005, 12:17 AM
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that's mess. i wouldn't date people like that because he says that he loves you but he's engaged to another woman. yeahh. cheater cheater!
 

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