Shattered, Poem |
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 Jan 25 2005, 07:24 PM
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#1
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 Crying Behind Blind Eyes  Group: Member Posts: 257 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 7,967  |
Shattered
By: Savannah Harrison Love becomes a mirror, A reflection of your withered soul. There's nothing there but just a shell, And your loneliness is metallic... Cold Slam a fist into your being, Fragile, breakable; Like a porcelain doll. Watch you crumble Watch you fall. What you craved has shattered, So just shatter. Rain your regret down upon my appearance, Bleed my tale-tell smile dry, Tear me apart with your broken glass. And perhaps our jagged pieces... Can someday become one. |
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Jan 26 2005, 10:47 AM
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#2
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 LunchboxXx Group: Member Posts: 1,789 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,810 |
"tale-tell"? isn't it "tell-tale"?
you're improving, no doubt about it. *thumbs up* never give up. |
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Jan 26 2005, 11:55 PM
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#3
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to hell with you Group: Member Posts: 2,547 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,506 |
i like it.
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| *stephinika* |
Jan 27 2005, 12:56 AM
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#4
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Guest |
nice. i really like these lines:
QUOTE Slam a fist into your being,
Fragile, breakable; Like a porcelain doll. |
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Jan 30 2005, 12:14 AM
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#5
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 575 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 92,400 |
I really liked it.. =) keep writing =P
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Jan 30 2005, 12:30 AM
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#6
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 i am a liar Group: Member Posts: 69 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 77,216 |
pretty nice, i like it
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Jan 30 2005, 12:56 PM
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#7
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 my <3 is in Ohio Group: Member Posts: 899 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 27,599 |
its good
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