An Atheist |
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An Atheist |
*Weird addiction* |
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#1
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An atheist was walking through the woods one day in Alaska, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What a powerful river! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. Turning to look, he saw a 13-foot Kodiak brown bear beginning to charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could down the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was rapidly closing on him. Somehow, he ran even faster, so scared that tears came to his eyes. He looked again and the bear was even closer. His heart pounding in his chest, he tried to run faster yet. But alas, he tripped and fell to the ground. As he rolled over to pick himself up, the bear was right over him, reaching for him with its left paw and raising its right paw to strike him.
"OH MY GOD! ..." Time stopped. The bear froze. The forest was silent. Even the river stopped moving ... As a brilliant light shone upon the man, a thunderous voice came from all around... "YOU DENY MY EXISTENCE FOR ALL THESE YEARS, TEACH OTHERS THAT I DON'T EXIST AND EVEN CREDIT CREATION TO SOME COSMIC ACCIDENT. DO YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP YOU OUT OF THIS PREDICAMENT? AM I TO COUNT YOU AS A BELIEVER?" Difficult as it was, the atheist looked directly into the light and said, "It would be hypocritical to ask to be a Christian after all these years, but perhaps you could make the bear a Christian?" "VERY WELL." Said God. The light went out. The river ran. The sounds of the forest resumed. ... and the bear dropped down on his knees, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, thank you for this food which I am about to receive." LMAO |
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#2
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 94 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 29,621 ![]() |
Whoo- hOo ! im first !! haha funny !
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#3
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![]() Ne0 Is The One ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,348 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 24,349 ![]() |
LMAO. Now that is a joke.
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#4
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![]() Change Gon Come ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 2,286 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 18,822 ![]() |
lmfao!!
good one |
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#5
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![]() N.CARTER ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,709 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,742 ![]() |
LMFAO. nice onee!
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*AngelicEyz00* |
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#6
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ROFLMAO... haha, i love this joke... haha, very funny
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#7
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,384 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 37,337 ![]() |
LMAO!! lol AHAHAH very funni
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#8
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![]() Yum. =] ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 888 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 16,139 ![]() |
lol funny!
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#9
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![]() Wife of Legolas ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,290 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,190 ![]() |
hahhaha this one's really good!
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#10
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![]() Hi! I'm Dani :) ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 5,637 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,369 ![]() |
lmao haha thats a good one
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#11
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,989 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,691 ![]() |
Haha funny.
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#12
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![]() Retired Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 879 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 4,843 ![]() |
haha that's funny
good thing God values people more than animals... |
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#13
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![]() doot doot doot ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,803 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 1,954 ![]() |
LOL hahaha funny
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#14
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![]() skaters gonna skate. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Official Member Posts: 6,861 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 6,336 ![]() |
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.
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#15
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![]() lil______d00ks ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 508 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 25,538 ![]() |
LMAO!!! hahaha thats good
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#16
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![]() BANNED ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 2,419 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 14,387 ![]() |
LMAO that was hilarious
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#17
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![]() GREEENROCKS ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,393 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 10,624 ![]() |
i heard this one before..lol..
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#18
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![]() Feeel X ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 2,814 Joined: Jan 2004 Member No: 1,498 ![]() |
hahahaha, god is so smart.
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#19
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You guys are dumb. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,252 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 25,094 ![]() |
Haha, quite a chuckle.
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#20
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![]() ranDUMB ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 757 Joined: Jul 2004 Member No: 35,833 ![]() |
OMG, i heard this joke b4. It's so funny!
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#21
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 7,048 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 22,696 ![]() |
haha well the bear has to eat too geez lol
and i dont really like this joke that much.... god wouldnt want to change anyones beliefs toward him.... that pisses me off |
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