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An Atheist
*Weird addiction*
post Aug 15 2004, 10:08 AM
Post #1





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An atheist was walking through the woods one day in Alaska, admiring all that evolution had created. "What majestic trees! What a powerful river! What beautiful animals!" he said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. Turning to look, he saw a 13-foot Kodiak brown bear beginning to charge towards him. He ran as fast as he could down the path. He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was rapidly closing on him. Somehow, he ran even faster, so scared that tears came to his eyes. He looked again and the bear was even closer. His heart pounding in his chest, he tried to run faster yet. But alas, he tripped and fell to the ground. As he rolled over to pick himself up, the bear was right over him, reaching for him with its left paw and raising its right paw to strike him.

"OH MY GOD! ..."

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

Even the river stopped moving ...

As a brilliant light shone upon the man, a thunderous voice came from all around...

"YOU DENY MY EXISTENCE FOR ALL THESE YEARS, TEACH OTHERS THAT I DON'T EXIST AND EVEN CREDIT CREATION TO SOME COSMIC ACCIDENT. DO YOU EXPECT ME TO HELP YOU OUT OF THIS PREDICAMENT? AM I TO COUNT YOU AS A BELIEVER?"

Difficult as it was, the atheist looked directly into the light and said, "It would be hypocritical to ask to be a Christian after all these years, but perhaps you could make the bear a Christian?"

"VERY WELL." Said God.

The light went out.

The river ran.

The sounds of the forest resumed.

... and the bear dropped down on his knees, brought both paws together, bowed his head and spoke: "Lord, thank you for this food which I am about to receive."

LMAO
 
StarStruck xD
post Aug 15 2004, 10:50 AM
Post #2


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Whoo- hOo ! im first !! haha funny !
 
MasterNe0
post Aug 15 2004, 11:20 AM
Post #3


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LMAO. Now that is a joke.
 
MrElsewhere
post Aug 15 2004, 01:19 PM
Post #4


Change Gon Come
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lmfao!!

good one
 
01-supergirl
post Aug 15 2004, 01:58 PM
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LMFAO. nice onee!
 
*AngelicEyz00*
post Aug 15 2004, 02:01 PM
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ROFLMAO... haha, i love this joke... haha, very funny
 
F1R3B4T
post Aug 15 2004, 02:03 PM
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LMAO!! lol AHAHAH very funni laugh.gif
 
diezelbabygrl_xo...
post Aug 15 2004, 02:32 PM
Post #8


Yum. =]
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lol funny! happy.gif
 
vivieeeen
post Aug 15 2004, 03:50 PM
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hahhaha this one's really good!
 
dani41790
post Aug 15 2004, 09:46 PM
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lmao haha thats a good one
 
xtremeliquid
post Aug 15 2004, 10:06 PM
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Haha funny.
 
likeachild
post Aug 15 2004, 10:08 PM
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haha that's funny


good thing God values people more than animals...
 
conster
post Aug 15 2004, 11:08 PM
Post #13


doot doot doot
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LOL hahaha funny
 
ANG33ZY
post Aug 15 2004, 11:11 PM
Post #14


skaters gonna skate.
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HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.
 
xHalf nHalf
post Aug 16 2004, 12:25 AM
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LMAO!!! hahaha thats good laugh.gif
 
inlonelinessidie
post Aug 16 2004, 12:35 AM
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LMAO that was hilarious laugh.gif
 
elmogurly
post Aug 16 2004, 04:38 AM
Post #17


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i heard this one before..lol.. laugh.gif
 
faithin_felix
post Aug 16 2004, 09:39 AM
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hahahaha, god is so smart.
 
MeanBastard
post Aug 16 2004, 01:22 PM
Post #19


You guys are dumb.
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Haha, quite a chuckle.
 
pnai4eva
post Aug 16 2004, 01:56 PM
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OMG, i heard this joke b4. It's so funny!
 
JlIaTMK
post Aug 16 2004, 03:21 PM
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haha well the bear has to eat too geez lol

and i dont really like this joke that much.... god wouldnt want to change anyones beliefs toward him.... that pisses me off
 

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