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Createblog Diary
eboarder2020
post Jul 14 2004, 10:14 PM
Post #126


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So i found out my ex g/f goes to CB for her xanga skin now... Now im worried because I dont want her knowing some of the stuff I posted on here... Ohhh man how do I deal now?
 
bobbster
post Jul 14 2004, 10:17 PM
Post #127


He ate it, I swear!
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Dear createBlog Diary,
SAJkflajskfjsjflka;sjfdk! I feel...soo.....so....sad. It's so depressing. RAWR! I feel like crying, but I can't. Damn it, this was useless.

--Bobbster
 
kraziegrl
post Jul 15 2004, 01:59 AM
Post #128


ºù¼ö~
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dear createblog diary, READ IT!! i put effort into this.. ><"

hehe my first time writing in this. happy.gif yesturday.. i found out somethign very disturbing. a person ive been very close to a while stole 50$ from me/my parents. my parents were away for a while, so she stayed at my home. shes 27. lets call her personx for now. my cousin was supposed to come over my house from korea for just a palce to rest. my mom told me to use my money, and shell pay me back later. i was supposed to put 200$ in an envelope and give it to him for him to ride a cab, you noe since my parents couldnt drive him. well instead, a very close priest of ours was going to drive him to the airport, and they both saw that it was 200$, but they didnt take it.

well, my cousin didnt need it, and i jsut left it on the kitchen table.. i mean no one was going to take it, right? yesturday, my parents came home. my mom looked at the envelope and it was only 150$.. i put in a 50, 50, 50, 20, 20, 10$'s in the envelope. she kept on asking me, are you sure?? and i said yes, im not stupid you noe.. maybe my cousin took 50$? and personx was there with us. we were eating.

later, after personx left, my mom told me why she kept on asking me. she said she thinks that personx took it. no one else was home. then she called my cousin and asked him if he took 50$ and he said no. later, he called my mom agen and said he's possitive he saw 200$ in there. priests do not steal. atleast not this one. he is one of the most important people in my life, and he knows that 50$ isnt worth much. plus, he bought me dinner twice while my parents were gone ><"

my mom was pisssedddddddd... at personx. she left a mess in our kitchen, by oil EVERYWHERE.. and she's acting like she cooked evrythign and all.. well i guess.. but now my point of view changed after that. also, in teh bathroom she put hair in the toilet.... my mom was freaking out and sadi that, that could clog our toilet. next time of course she wont come over agen..

she was really clsoe to me.. thats what hurt the most. cry.gif i really dont noe what to think of her when i see her... she goes to my church somtiems, but my church is korean-english mass. she goes in the morning to another mass.. so i dont really see her much. shes a good catholic.......... or so i thought. the moments we had? its all over..

its not the fact that she took 50$ from me. i dont care about money. its how she would do seomthign to make me not trust her. well .. everything happens for a reason.. and this one was so i could never trust her agen.

~ marci
 
Winter
post Jul 15 2004, 07:16 AM
Post #129


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Dear createBlog Diary,

I think I might die when he goes for his Marines boot camp in PI. Seriously.

I just want to hear his voice one last time.

And he has to leave right before my exams. Great. He's always been the one who got me through them, what am I gonna do now?!

Love,
Winter
 
eboarder2020
post Jul 17 2004, 08:50 AM
Post #130


Pimp Status
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Posts: 640
Joined: Jan 2004
Member No: 1,200



What does it take for a man to be with someone he really wants to be? What does it honestly, truely take to be the man you want me to be? What does it take to make a dream come true, what does it take to be loved like I have loved? Do I not have something? do I not carry something special enough, or is the luck im looking for just one that doesnt exist for me anymore. Megan and I had a conversation about yesterday and whether or not it existed... I wish I could have given an answer that was definite but I didnt. Does luck really exist, or is it like how Dashboard Confessional said "I guess its luck but its the same....Hard Luck"... Megan had told me that luck doesnt exist. Her reasons were that god had a plan for every one of us and since we fall into that plan it wasnt luck, but it was percision, and it was planned. For her luck doesnt exist, but I always believe that we all need a little luck to get going on this world. Megan is right. God has a plan for all of us.. Megan is right in the fact that we fall into his plans and that we do the things that come to us...Shes right about everything, but consider this. The fact that someone, or something fell into that plan, is in itself luck right? Its like Kristin and Jon or MAtt and Kelly, or Me and Megan... Sure god had everything planned out in our lives, but the fact that Megan crossed paths with me, and matt with kelly, and jon with kristin, doesnt that make us lucky because the paths crossed? Maybe luck existed back then, but how about now? Whats luck for me? I dont know if i even wanna know if luck can happen to me. I really dont wannna know whether or not I'll get lucky somewhere later in life. Luck is something thats so hard to believe anymore. After what I've been through, after the things i've felt, after the emotions spent, after the long lasting nights, luck seems like something that'll only happen in a book or fairy tale... Some people say that Im lucky, but wheres my luck? You know if she loved me so much, then why did she leave? If she knew how hard i hit rock bottom, why didnt she help me? If she meant the things she said, then why did she break her promises? If she says that Im so strong, then why do i feel like im so weak? If my luck is so good, then why does she set out to find someone else to take my spot in her heart? If I had that big of an impact on her, then why am I the one suffering? You know if she says that im the one who is so special and that I deserve the things that I want, then where is my girlfriend??? Where the fudge is my Megan??? Thats my luck ladies and gentlemen. My luck is luck no matter how you see it... Maybe my luck is just...Bad.
 
onenonly101
post Jul 17 2004, 11:51 PM
Post #131


i'm too cool 4 school
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My nose is running, my eyes are watering, now my nose is stuffed up, folks are actin a darn fool................We went to a wedding reception tonight. You know we were running on African time the wedding itself(25th anniversary thing) started at 2pm, and the reception followed at like 5. we rolled up their at 7:30pm. It was nice. I will not have ANY body speaking at my wedding, not a darn person, because people like to say really foolish stuff when they get the mic, especially the mc.of all the events. Shawty why is my sister on my back right now, and i know she is reading this sentence while i type it. lol. Anyways, We cleaned all today until the evening then left for the reception. My hair was looking a straight mess, when I got into the car and that was working out for me so i had to get all Towers on ya and jazz up my hair wit the side part/swoop(as much as i could i swear i wish i had white peoples hair or indian or hispanic anyways) and tease the back up. yup i was looking like a different person when i was finished. The recpetion was good saw some folks i knew there, cuz you know it was their family's thing. Sweet Mother was played so i had to get up and dance. I was mad though cuz when we wre in the car they played my song, premier gaou. I cannot wait until Thursday because then we leave for Houston which equals having a lot of fun. This year will be relaxing and fun. We are staying at the holiday inn in Sugarland, Sugarland is rich mans land in texas so the area will be nice. My birthday is next Sunday...WUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU. I'll be 15 finally. This might be my last entry until i come back, I'm not sure. Tomorrow is the meeting at my house,Monday i need to figure what i am wearing get some really nice clothes(that wat my parentes want us to do is get really nice clothes, cuz for example thursday the day we get in my uncle is thrwoing a party at a hotel for someone in houston so....then of course saturday big party). hopefully Tuesday get my hair done and wash all my clothes, Wednesday pack,pack,pack. Thursday leave. I got a new swimsuit yeah....it is cute a tankini..well time to go i got church in the morning

Love
 
Just_Dream
post Jul 18 2004, 12:02 AM
Post #132


durian
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July 17th, 2004

My Dearest Diary,

There are times when I feel like the world is out to get me, like I don't belong whereever I go. I watch myself fall apart from the distance from my beloved. All I can do is sit at home, in hopes that someday in the future, I'll be glad I stayed home and didn't go out and party like others do (although i wish I COULD party like them, just for once). Tony finally treats me as if the next day I might die, so he'll try to get every little hug and kiss he could get before our short time together is over. He doesn't realize that I do love him so much and that I do really really miss him and that if I could, I would hold him close and never let go. But for now, I have to not show that I miss him too much because it seems that the more i show my affection, the more he tries to resist me. I can't help but think about him. My intentions on my plans for the future revolves around Tony. I want to get a good education in hopes that I can get a good, high-paying job so that I can be financially stable and be able to support Tony in whatever he does with his life. I don't want him to suffer through a life he doesn't want to live. For now, I can just hope that we, Tony and I, can both endure the terrible life that we are living now for 2 more years, and only then will we be able to escape the wretched clutches of what people call family.

Well, Diary, that is all I have to say for now. Tomorrow is another day. I shall write more if I have time.

----Christina
 
hybrid
post Jul 18 2004, 12:27 AM
Post #133


pixel hybrid
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Dear Diary,

I hate me.
I want to die.
But I love --- =X

nevermind.

Love,
K1m
 
LatinaLady
post Jul 20 2004, 02:19 AM
Post #134


Look its...
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dear so called cB diary.
why are people so damn judgmental. and especially when they dont even know you. people think they know me and have the "right" to say crap about me. Guess what hun, you dont. and then online. my goodness gat a friggen life. everyone has a chance to say what ever they want and like to kiss ass. so stupid.
 
queen
post Jul 20 2004, 12:13 PM
Post #135


‹(. .)›
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dear diary,
...my life is perfect. end of entry.

p.s. note the sarcasm
 
chanleythemanley
post Jul 26 2004, 10:02 AM
Post #136


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Dear CB Diary,

This is my first and maybe last time writing in this but I needed to let it all out right now. I feel like crap right now. I mean, I was being so pissy at someone and it turns out his/her life was a living hell and what did I do to help? Nothing.. So now I am questioning why I act like that. Everytime somone actually might need me I go and I have to be a complete jerk. I had tried so hard to change from the way I used to be but now, it's all up in smoke. I am making my life hell right..

Right now I am questioning everything in my life, except the friends who stick by me. I love them so much. I mean, I am even questioning my faith and I don't know what's wrong with me at all. I feel so, wrong, unclean (maybe). I guess I've been lying to everyone including myself but what way is there to get out of it?

I did get close to "starting" the other day when my dad kept getting pissy when I was talk to my mom. I don't know what his problem is either. I think he likes to put us down.

Back to the orignal situation. I am such a kid, which I know shouldn't be bad but I am empty of anything I once had. I mean, I don't know what made me turn out this way. One day I was just cold, and void of any feeling for almost about everything. I think those words are haunting me again 'My heart is heavy. It crushes my soul' When I had wrote that , I was on the brink of depression most likely but I snapped out of it. It did hit me the other week and I was so drab and as soon as I was coming out of it this crap happens.

I miss him too. He isn't my boyfriend just a friend that I haven't spoken to in a long time and it worries me. People tell me that he is alright but I just can't shake the feeling that he isn't. He lives thousands of miles away and I've never met him but we used to talk all the time, at least everyday. Noe it's been almost 5 months since I have even seen him online. They say he is just hanging out with all of his 'asian' friends, which pisses me off a bit. He say'd that he always be here and he's not cry.gif I just hope and pray that he is alright. My friend told me to give him a call but what would I say. The first thing I want to ask him where the hell he has been and tell him how much I've missed. I guess it shouldn't matter. I'll get over it.
*random* I think I am just worrying too much about everything. I mean I was on edge until recently because my brother had gotten in an accident but nothing happened to him btu I just keep thinking What if he died? I am pretty o.k now though. He got his new car and so it's all good. I am worried about my dad too. He had a heart attack a few months back. He came out of it fine but now he 'cheats' on his ne diet a lot. I mean, that night was the most nerve wrecking night of my life and I don't want it to happen the next time and him end up dead. I don't even know how I would take it.

Oh a happier note. I got back in the swing of talk to my 'bro' I missed him too. He makes me laugh everytime we talk, which is a pretty big deal right now. My friends are suppose to come to my house friday so that will be fun. We are going to con in november and that will be a blast. Marching band starts soon, which I am looking forward to. I need to be normal again...

Peace, Love, and Ramen,
Ley-Chan
 
islandkiss
post Jul 26 2004, 10:23 AM
Post #137


Kermit the frog = <3
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dear diary,

well, I finally did it. I called him yesterday. it felt great.. I'm leaving today in the afternoon at 5 to florida. =[. It'll be my first time, ever, on a plane. I can't hardly wait. you'll miss me right?.

I have 2 more posts until I reach my 2100 th post. I swear, I'm obsessed with this. >.<.

kelly.
 
xosteffanator
post Jul 26 2005, 06:20 PM
Post #138


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fun!!! I wanna try.
Dear createblog diary,
My teeth are KILLING ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have in these stupid spacers and sonner or later I'm gonna get braces!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!-Your in pain writer steffie
 
Mulder
post Jul 26 2005, 08:39 PM
Post #139


i lost weight with Mulder!
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dear cb diary,

my job sucks. my teacher gave me a lecture about how I'm setting a bad example for the volunteers, and how i'm not doing my job well enough, and maybe I should transfer out. I'm the one who always goes and gets things....all day long. my feet are killing me from walking so much. I do everything she asks me to, I get every supply........grrrrrr @#$%

-michelle
 
Looow
post Jul 26 2005, 08:41 PM
Post #140


Senior Member
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Why did you bring up an old topic? Goodness.
 
*stephinika*
post Jul 26 2005, 10:25 PM
Post #141





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closed

check out the pinned cb diary please.
 

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