What to do..., when your "fiance" doesnt want to marry you? Options

[Stuckie]

Some of you may know that Im in the army and in Iraq at the moment. But the issue is kinda... yeah. I knew this girl for about 3 years or so. We've been on again off again for all of it. Mostly because of my field of work (A soldier). But I got stationed in Germany around mid July last year, so every time we talked was over the internet. MySpace to be exact. After a few months of messaging and liquor, I proposed to her. Over MySpace. I know its not classy, but I was drunk. And she accepted. So we're still communicating over the internet, and a week before Valentine's Day, I order a bouqet of lilies and a box of chocolate to get sent to her house. The next day I called her to tell her I sent her a gift for Valentine's Day. She told me I shouldn't have done that, because her boyfriend would get upset. So I hang up the phone and try to gather what just happened. I guess its not so much a question, as its more me venting to other random people for feedback. Any comments?

[shoryuken]

Some of you may know that Im in the army and in Iraq at the moment. But the issue is kinda... yeah. I knew this girl for about 3 years or so. We've been on again off again for all of it. Mostly because of my field of work (A soldier). But I got stationed in Germany around mid July last year, so every time we talked was over the internet. MySpace to be exact. After a few months of messaging and liquor, I proposed to her. Over MySpace. I know its not classy, but I was drunk. And she accepted. So we're still communicating over the internet, and a week before Valentine's Day, I order a bouqet of lilies and a box of chocolate to get sent to her house. The next day I called her to tell her I sent her a gift for Valentine's Day. She told me I shouldn't have done that, because her boyfriend would get upset. So I hang up the phone and try to gather what just happened. I guess its not so much a question, as its more me venting to other random people for feedback. Any comments?

you FAIIL n git PWN.. haha

beech around age 20 n shiet.. dey aint gonna stick round 4va..

[mipadi]

Maybe she thought you were kidding. Since, you know, you proposed to her over the Internet. Look, I don't mean to sound like a f*cking douche bag here, but it's kind of lame to ask for a date over the Internet, so a marriage proposal via MySpace is just so ridiculous that I don't see how anyone could take it seriously. Especially a woman; I don't mean to be stereotypical, but women like a little romance, and proposing over the Internet is very un-romantic.

On a more mellow note, long-distance relationships are hard. They're hard even when you talk on the phone regularly, and can visit each other in person every few weeks. So a relationship that takes place almost entirely via the Internet is all but impossible. So don't sweat it for now; if she really likes you, you can pick things up where you left off stateside. If not, unfortunately, it's just not meant to be. But don't take it personally, it's not your fault, it's just the lousy situation.

[dpl313]

This sorf of reminds me of that dude from Jarhead. I've been cheated on. It sucks. I'd say f*** that b**** and keep it moving.

[Stuckie]

Yeah. I guess you're right. But I knew this girl for years. And she knew I couldnt propose in a romantic setting. We were together at the time. She pretty much dumped me and didnt tell me about it. And thats not what really got me mad. What Im really pissed is I bought a $2000 dollar engagement ring. She "dumped" me 1 month and a half before I bought it. That b*tch should have told me the deal before hand. I cant get money back because it was personalized. F*ck it. Charlie Mike. More fish in the sea.

[brooklyneast05]

there's really no excuse to propose to someone over the internet like that. i get that if you're in two different places it's physically impossible to do it in person at the time, but if that's eh case you don't need to be proposing. i think it's pretty pointless to propose to someone you aren't with with at the moment. in that case you should wait until you're REALLY together.

i mean even if it had worked it would still be lame. women like that kinda shit and most of them think the whole proposing thing is a big moment in their life. why you would want them to have such a cold, lame, and unthoughtful memory to look back on for the rest of their life, i have no clue. i think that's pretty unthoughtful on your part. there's no reason a proposal couldn't be romantic. if you can't make that a good experience for the girl then you just aren't doing your job well enough imo.

i don't know. i just don't think you should be that offended that you proposed to someone DRUNK on myspace and it didn't work out. it was a bad way to go about the whole situation. proposing should be a big deal, not just something you do in passing as you're drunk. you're asking someone to be with you FOREVER, that's a pretty big deal and kind of an insult to do so drunk and on myspace.

[smash]

^ that's my .

the "i was drunk" excuse is ancient. if you know your limit you shouldn't go over it. if you don't then you don't need to be drinking. i agree with everyone else on the proposing via myspace. it's lame. 'nough said. i don't think she cared enough about you and your feelings to let you know she was getting into another relationship. she should've let you know when she first started catching feelings for the other guy. if she says she didn't wanna hurt your feelings that's really no excuse, in my opinion. i think it hurts more to be deceived and dumbed than it does when someone is honest from the beginning. i mean, look where you're at emotionally now. would you be feeling the same if she had told you she was falling for someone else before you bought the ring? i'm sure you would be heart broken but i doubt you would feel exactly the same. at least then you could respect her for being honest.

[Stuckie]

Im actually not so much heartbroken. Its more pissed than heartbroken.

I know the whole proposing over myspace was lame, but I literally wasnt going to see her for over a year. It must have been pre-deployment jitters mixed in with a severe case of stupidity. Damn I lost 2 grand. Im never gonna see it again.

[illriginal]

Well... she has a boyfriend... bro you're traveling the world. There's millions upon millions of women outside of the U.S. who will treat you like a king. Get yourself a foreign woman!!!

[shoryuken]

Im actually not so much heartbroken. Its more pissed than heartbroken.

I know the whole proposing over myspace was lame, but I literally wasnt going to see her for over a year. It must have been pre-deployment jitters mixed in with a severe case of stupidity. Damn I lost 2 grand. Im never gonna see it again.

save that ring.. u never know.. LMAO

or try sell it man..

you fuk up BIG TIME..

[Realized]

Honestly? Most of you take a whole proposal out of hand.
If the girl loved you truly, she wouldn't care how you did it. She'd just love the fact that you were hers, and vice versa.

Okay maybe you shouldn't of done it on myspace... Maybe it was just pre-deployment jitters... but she had no right to do to you what she did, she could of at the very least told you she moved on.

If you wanted to propose; you could of at least done it over the phone.

Or maybe I'm just one of those girls that don't care about the material... it's just more of the thought that matters

In the end; Sorry for your loss, kick the bitches ass when you get home

Do you know if she even took you seriously in the first place? Army relationships are hecka hard. Two of my closest guy friends are in them, and I absolutely hate the girls they're with... but in the end it's their choice

--err, i better stop before I rant more :x

[Stuckie]

German women love black men. All males of the urban persuasion should visit germany. The only bad thing about it is the currency exchange. Close to $1.30 to the Euro.

Well I cant save the ring for someone else, because it has her name in it. Unless I find a girl with the same name. No one will buy a customized item, because its,well... customized.

She wasnt all that materialistic. She grew up in a poor christian family. She never had much and never wanted much when we were together. I saved money with her.

[illriginal]

German women love black men.

Dood... Philippino women, Italian women, Dominican women, Brazilian women... shit man, they hear that American accent, prepare to be raped by a foreign woman.

[Stuckie]

^ I lived near Dominicans and Puerto Ricans. They dont go crazy around americans. Unless they're trying to get in country.

[SuckDickNSaveLiv...]

I know people might not agree with this, but I can totally understand why he proposed to her over the net. Its obvious that he loved the girl, but nothing is guaranteed in his line of work. It's not like they going to let him come back home to propose. There is also the fact that there is no telling when he'll come back home period being a solider and all. If anything, the person that is at fault is the girl for not being woman enough to tell him sooner she was seeing someone else.

I would hope a woman has the decency enough to tell me she playing me, so that I can stop putting effort into the relationship and be done with it. She did so a little too late.

[gojira]

I can totally understand why he proposed to her over the net. Its obvious that he loved the girl

LOL

[SuckDickNSaveLiv...]

LOL

I was being serious but then I reread that last sentence. The way its worded.

[hypnotique]

Dood... Philippino women, Italian women, Dominican women, Brazilian women... shit man, they hear that American accent, prepare to be raped by a foreign woman.

bitches love teh irish accent also.