Crossing the Line Options

[fameONE]

For the sake of boredom, conversation and an attempt to combine a bunch of different topics...

I understand that my approach to relationships and friendships may differ greatly from yours, maybe not. Either way, at what point does an opposite-gender friendship become a potential intimate relationship?

Is it worth it?

Your significant other is, ultimately, your best friend, so would such a friendship make for a better relationship?

Do you have one friend (of the opposie sex) in your life that you could see yourself with?

[Comptine]

A lot of people say that females and males cannot be friends. Someone will eventually end up wanting more.

My two best guy friends, one from middle school and one from college, are both people I really cannot picture myself with. Sure, I crushed on my middle school friend, but I am much more comfortable being friends with him than pursuing a relationship. My college friend, other than initially thinking he was good looking, have never thought of him in any romantic way, period.

I've known my boyfriend since middle school but I didn't start dating him until freshman year of high school. I guess the moment I wanted a romantic relationship is when I realized that being friends just wasn't enough. I think that's how most people realize. Yeah, the person talks to you and supports you but even though they are a great friend, you still feel the relationship isn't enough.

[gojira]

rambling. this makes me think of musiq soulchild - half crazy

in my experience, dating a friend was always more fun. there was no awkward getting to know each other stage, we were already comfortable. but as well you think you know someone, you'll always learn new things about them. the aftermath, if there is one, is never fun to deal with. it's hard to continue friendship after that, especially if it ended on a bitter note. it's actually usually difficult for me to cross the line with friends. most of the time, i don't want to ruin what we already have or it's hard for me to see them in that way. as of right now, i can't see myself ending up with any of my very good guy friends. it's hard for me to see what's already there. but imo, i think it's worth it if you do end up falling for them. you'd want your lifelong partner to become your best friend eventually or at least i would.

[fameONE]

rambling. this makes me think of musiq soulchild - half crazy

in my experience, dating a friend was always more fun. there was no awkward getting to know each other stage, we were already comfortable. but as well you think you know someone, you'll always learn new things about them. the aftermath, if there is one, is never fun to deal with. it's hard to continue friendship after that, especially if it ended on a bitter note. it's actually usually difficult for me to cross the line with friends. most of the time, i don't want to ruin what we already have or it's hard for me to see them in that way. as of right now, i can't see myself ending up with any of my very good guy friends. it's hard for me to see what's already there. but imo, i think it's worth it if you do end up falling for them. you'd want your lifelong partner to become your best friend eventually or at least i would.

Now that I think about it, I've never fully crossed that line with one of my friends. I've had a short-lived fling, that was only meant to be a one night stand, that, somehow became a really close friendship. That was interesting. There may have been physical encounters as well, but never have I pursued a relationship with a friend.

[gojira]

Now that I think about it, I've never fully crossed that line with one of my friends. I've had a short-lived fling, that was only meant to be a one night stand, that, somehow became a really close friendship. That was interesting. There may have been physical encounters as well, but never have I pursued a relationship with a friend.

why? honestly, i prefer not dating a friend but if it happens, it happens. relationship might turn sour note, then i'm left to deal with all kinds of shit i didn't think of before. i sort of like meeting strangers and getting to know them, though there's more of a chance of them deceiving you than a friend would before entering a relationship.

[*KINGdinguhling*]

why? honestly, i prefer not dating a friend but if it happens, it happens. relationship might turn sour note, then i'm left to deal with all kinds of shit i didn't think of before. i sort of like meeting strangers and getting to know them, though there's more of a chance of them deceiving you than a friend would before entering a relationship.

this basically says, "new dick is good"

[fameONE]

why? honestly, i prefer not dating a friend but if it happens, it happens. relationship might turn sour note, then i'm left to deal with all kinds of shit i didn't think of before. i sort of like meeting strangers and getting to know them, though there's more of a chance of them deceiving you than a friend would before entering a relationship.

The thing is, I only have one friend that I could ever see myself falling for if she and I got too close. Other than that, it hasn't been much of an opportunity.

As far as meeting new people; it gets boring after a while. I'm a reformed serial dater, so to speak. I've had the most fun meeting a girl on facebook, who coincidentally lived one building over from me in college, got to know her through IM and emails, and finally ran into her, after a month, at the mess hall. She transferred schools, we still keep in touch, as friends, but it never materialized into any beyond that.

For now, the idea of crossing the line will remain as, nothing more than, an idea.

[*KINGdinguhling*]

For now, the idea of crossing the line will remain as, nothing more than, an idea.

disizit

[loveneko]

I understand that my approach to relationships and friendships may differ greatly from yours, maybe not. Either way, at what point does an opposite-gender friendship become a potential intimate relationship?

Is it worth it?

Your significant other is, ultimately, your best friend, so would such a friendship make for a better relationship?

Do you have one friend (of the opposie sex) in your life that you could see yourself with?

I don't believe that men and women can truly be friends without first going through feelings for the other person. They dont have to act on them, but they will get them. The opposite gender relationship crosses the line when both parties act on hormones or on their feelings. Of course, if both friends are single, there's no problem and you can bounce back. But when you're in a relationship, it highlights all the good qualities of your male friend.

[hi-C]

I don't know, I think men and women can be friends without the presence of feelings. I have guy friends that I'm not sexually attracted to.

That being said, I've crossed the line with a male friend and it ended pretty... weirdly. My feelings for him went a little further than his for me. He even admitted that he *knew* that I felt that way and asked himself if he should follow my lead and told himself no. What kind of crazy person does that? Then after some time we ended up as f*ck buddies and now we don't really talk. It was worth it though. To be that intensely wrapped up in someone else. To be... in touch with your feelings on that kind of level.

[Tsukuyomi-No-Mok...]

I think that the more time you spend with someone and the more you and another connect that's where feelings begin to come into play.

I say this because in good relationships two people who've known each other for a while and have gotten to know each other well and bond with each other over time, they tend to grow feelings towards each other

As friends the friendship changes depending on the type of experiences the two people go through.

For example (and this is jus from what i see and think i'm not stating anything that's set in stone) if two people know each other all their life and basically live like they are brother and sister then their friendship tends to grow like that and that's how they see each other. then usuallly they find out that they are better off close friends either through expeimenting with each other or they just make it known to each other from the jump.

if two people meet each other and get to know each other, talking hanging out and opening up to each other over time then usually they end up getting closer and then when the exeriences become physical then the relationship changes

kinda like that...
anyway i'm in class so trying to focus is a lil tough lol

[Tsukuyomi-No-Mok...]

I don't believe that men and women can truly be friends without first going through feelings for the other person. They dont have to act on them, but they will get them. The opposite gender relationship crosses the line when both parties act on hormones or on their feelings. Of course, if both friends are single, there's no problem and you can bounce back. But when you're in a relationship, it highlights all the good qualities of your male friend.

I agree with this to a point
cause you can be friends with another person with out exactly having feelings for them.
not to be confused with an acquaintance which is someone you jsut acknoledge.
but friends don't exactly have feelings for each other i mean they care bout each other and look out for each other and all but as time passes then the feelings kick in

somethin like that
i guess it jus depends on what you mean by feelings

[towntown2]

I have three best guy friends, and I will talk about my relationships with them to make a point.

1. M -- we'd known each other as acquaintances for a while, but it wasn't until last year and this school year that we'd gotten very close with each other. While his relationship with a longtime girlfriend soured, I was there to listen and offer advice. When I needed to disclose a huge secret to someone, he was there to put his arm around me when I sobbed.
I had had some mild feelings for him while his relationship was falling apart, but I never acted on it because I figured they were just nothing. I figured right, because now we are like brother and sister. We get each other, and we're not afraid to be honest with each other.

2. J -- he and I have been best friends since my freshman year. We share everything together, and we're secure enough that we branch out to do things on our own. We call each other for support, for advice, to bitch. I have never had any feelings toward him whatsoever, and it works.

3. D -- this guy is amazing. He makes everybody around him feel at ease, and he is always in good humor. D always looks good, he takes care of himself. Bottom line is, he's very hot. I can definitely see myself having a relationship with him if the opportunity ever presents itself, because he and I look for the same things in the opposite sex. I believe that we would have a good relationship together, but as he is moving away tomorrow, I will only remain a best friend. I don't know if he's attracted to me, but I do know that he loves me [as a best friend, of course] and I love him, too.

It is absolutely possible for members of the opposite sex to maintain a platonic friendship without sexual tension.

[sixfive]

Dating someone completely stranger can be fun, despite the awkward getting to know eachother phase. That phase I have found to be interesting and yo unever know what's going to happen. Once you end up in the relationship stage, you tend to become closer and closer, and from that friendship develops. So dating a friend vs dating a stranger, in time it gets to the same point and turns to as if you were friends for the longest time (assuming it isn't one of those middle school relationships where you date omsone new every week). Maintaining friendship after a break up is very possible if you want it to happen, so long as you're not a complete jackhole. Takes effort, though :] Gotta be willing to go the extra mile, or marathon.

[fameONE]

In hindsight; this is a total dice roll. I'm not really sure how my luck worked out in this situation. I still have mixed feelings.

[ley]

For the sake of boredom, conversation and an attempt to combine a bunch of different topics...

I understand that my approach to relationships and friendships may differ greatly from yours, maybe not. Either way, at what point does an opposite-gender friendship become a potential intimate relationship?

Is it worth it?

Your significant other is, ultimately, your best friend, so would such a friendship make for a better relationship?

Do you have one friend (of the opposie sex) in your life that you could see yourself with?

I think men and women can def be friends. I have alot of guy friends that i love and it would be hard to live without. The chances of me hooking up with them is pretty much zero. I'm not going to say their is no attraction because a few of them have told me the only reason they started talking to me was because they liked me, but it grew into a friendship.

I did at one time date a guy that was one of my best friends, i thought it was def worth it. I loved him as a friend before we got together, and i dont think i have or ever will love a guy as much as i did him. I think us being friends is what made our relationship so great. We knew alot about each other and i loved that he wouldn't take any of my shit. We were always completely honest and comfortable with each other. The downside was we ended up going to college in different places and wouldn't see each other as much as we hoped. I made the decision we should go back to being just friends and see other people. We both thought this would be a good thing and when he got back if we were meant to be together we would.

I was doing the single drunk college freshman girl thing. He was doing the poke as many girls as possible thing, and he got a girl pregnant. When he got back it just wasn't the same to me. His babymama would call me saying how i was taking her baby's dad away. It was too much for me to handle at the time. I can fight a million bitches for my man but not a baby. So we broke up. Anyway we are to this day really good friends. I actually spent the day with him this last sunday on fathers day (my dads out of town). To me it was worth it, and even after a relationship we are still friends.

[hypnotique]

I don't do "f*ckbuddies" nor do i allow myself to cross the line if a platonic friendship has been established anymore because (specifically with women) you end up seeing their worst side as emotions become compromised seeing as they have feelings for you and then everything unravels.

For me its fairly easy to put people into one or the other and if you start off my friend in the end you end up staying there these days.

[manny-the-dino]

I think that the more time you spend with someone and the more you and another connect that's where feelings begin to come into play.

I say this because in good relationships two people who've known each other for a while and have gotten to know each other well and bond with each other over time, they tend to grow feelings towards each other

This is how one of my guy friends and I are. We've known each other for about 7 years now and we're good friends. We talk about pretty much anything and we're comfortable around each other. But we stopped talking for a couple of years because we weren't in the same classes and hung out with different people. However this past year when we started talking again, I began to develop feelings for him. But I don't want to be more than friends with him because it can ruin our friendship and make things awkward. On the other hand I wouldn't mind being with him because he's such a sweet and funny guy. But I dk. Honestly, I'd rather be left wondering "what if" instead of having a weird friendship with him if things don't go well.