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concerned.
jaznique
post Sep 13 2008, 06:03 PM
Post #1


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so I've been w| my gf for almost two months now
& everything's practically perfect..
but I cant help thinking about her ex gf.

they were together for a year & a couple of months;
& I feel as if there's still something there,

& this is my first real relationship w| a girl;
& I don't want to get hurt..

she once joked about leaving me for her
& I believe 50% of all jokes are semi-true.
& she has admitted to still having a tiny bit of feelings for her..

I want to talk to her about it;
but I don't want her to think I'm jealous..
I'm just worried..

what are some questions I can ask her ( & myself ) to reassure that this is a solid relationship ? _unsure.gif
 
misoshiru
post Sep 13 2008, 06:09 PM
Post #2


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are you male or female
 
Melissa
post Sep 13 2008, 07:20 PM
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female.

she said her girlfriend's "ex-gf" :D
 
misoshiru
post Sep 13 2008, 07:58 PM
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yan lin♥
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well..his/her girlfriend could always be bi.
 
towntown2
post Sep 13 2008, 08:32 PM
Post #5


Mais je ne l'aime pas
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okay, well, gender aside..
you should tell her what you told us.

you can voice your concern without sounding jealous or overprotective.
if your girlfriend cares, then she'd really listen and try to solve the problem.
 
imperfectionistx
post Sep 13 2008, 09:44 PM
Post #6


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QUOTE
okay, well, gender aside..
you should tell her what you told us.

you can voice your concern without sounding jealous or overprotective.
if your girlfriend cares, then she'd really listen and try to solve the problem.


I agree with this. You should be able to voice your concern WITH sounding jealous or overprotective if YOU want to. If she really cares about you and your feelings, it wouldn't matter the way you came off as, because they are YOUR FEELINGS and they are important & they should be important to your girlfriend too.

If she is bringing up those feelings then there probably is some truth to it, but maybe she just needs some time to settle in to your new relationship and figure out what she really wants.

You should ask her what she really wants in a relationship, or if she's even ready to be in one right now. Also, ask her if there's anything you can do to make her feel better or what YOU can do to make the relationship better than her last. You should also ask her what she likes about you. If she can't think of much I'd say she's stuck on her ex.
 
karmakiller
post Sep 13 2008, 10:43 PM
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QUOTE(towntown2 @ Sep 13 2008, 08:32 PM) *
okay, well, gender aside..
you should tell her what you told us.

you can voice your concern without sounding jealous or overprotective.
if your girlfriend cares, then she'd really listen and try to solve the problem.

I agree. Communication is key. If you don't tell her how you feel, then she'll never know. But it sounds to me like she is trying to hint some concern to you... when you she says in a "joking" tone that she still has feelings for her ex. I think she's trying to open the door on that one, but she doesn't just want to come out and say it, because she's worried that you're going to get angry or jealous.
 

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