dazed and confused., craziness in my life. |
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 Feb 5 2008, 10:57 AM
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#1
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 Newbie  Group: Member Posts: 5 Joined: Jan 2008 Member No: 615,964  |
so i am currently attending art school. while two of my friends from high school are attending a community college back home. we have discussed some living arrangements for next fall because they are going to be attending school in the same area as me. they are both dating, and have been for about 2 years now. i am completely okay with moving in with them, but i kinda have a huge secret that could change the whole situation. i am gay, and they dont know. i dont want this to affect our plans for next year, but at the same time they need to be informed of the situation, because it can be awkward if i just start bringing random guys to the apartment.
i guess i am just afraid of how they are going to react. i dont want this to be the end of a friendship that has lasted since elementary school. we managed to stay in touch while going our seperate ways, and now that the trio could be getting back together i guess i am just afraid. well i guess i am done ranting and raving for the day. comments/suggestions would be much appreciated. |
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Feb 5 2008, 05:44 PM
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#2
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 cake or DEATH Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 631 Joined: Sep 2005 Member No: 223,586 |
i would suggest that you simply tell them. it's better to get this off your chest before the living arrangements are done, and you won't have the pressure on yourself anymore.
they're your friends, after all; i'm sure they will be accepting. |
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Feb 5 2008, 06:57 PM
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#3
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 The Resident Drunk Group: Head Staff Posts: 8,623 Joined: Nov 2007 Member No: 593,266 |
Are these friends guys or girls? I only ask, because girls tend to be more accepting of the idea. Chances are, that they might already know that you are gay, and are just waiting for you to tell them. I would definitely say to tell them asap because you don't want to wait, and then make the situation worse than what it already is.
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Feb 5 2008, 09:16 PM
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#4
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 That's what she said. Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 3,559 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 130,200 |
If you don't tell them, you'll have more things to worry about. Look, you guys have been friends for years. I doubt they'd let something like that get in the way of your firnedship. Just get it off of your chest. You and I both know that thats what you want to do above anything.
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Feb 5 2008, 09:20 PM
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#5
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 Melieized Group: Official Designer Posts: 1,372 Joined: Nov 2006 Member No: 478,715 |
 if your friends are guys though, i don't really think that they would really mind too much but of course you can never know. if not, then they were never your friends to begin with. friends should be able to accept you for who you are. 
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Feb 5 2008, 10:03 PM
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#6
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Member Group: Ask Alice Posts: 26 Joined: Dec 2007 Member No: 601,954 |
Are your friends known for being in any way homophobic? Have they given you reason to worry about their reaction? Pending that they are not indeed homophobic, it doesn't sound like it should be a problem. You should definitely tell them though, because otherwise, an incident could get very awkward, like you said, were you to bring a date home or something. Just sit them down and start off with something like, "I figured I should tell you guys this before we move in together so you're not surprised..." You know? Don't make it more serious than it is and it's likely that they won't either.
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Feb 5 2008, 10:12 PM
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#7
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 DDR \\ I'm Dee :) Group: Mentor Posts: 8,662 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 384,020 |
Chances are it's a bigger deal to you than it is to them. If they're your friends they will come around to the idea, if they do not automatically accept you. If they've been your friends for THAT long of a time they might already suspect something. Just be honest with them...
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Feb 5 2008, 10:31 PM
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#8
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 193 Joined: Jun 2007 Member No: 537,000 |
Just tell them. If you've been friends this long they should understand.
And plus if you've been friends this long and have never had a girlfriend nor shown any signs of attraction to females, I'm sure they have considered the possibility that you're gay. |
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Feb 6 2008, 01:50 AM
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#9
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 Being happy...is all that matters Group: Member Posts: 765 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 102,284 |
As others have said, if you guys have been friends since elementary, this probably won't be a big deal for them. You've been through the thick and thin together--and being gay shouldn't and wouldn't change what you guys have together.
Just be open about it and tell them. |
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Feb 6 2008, 01:56 AM
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#10
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 <3<3<3<3 Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 3,177 Joined: Feb 2004 Member No: 3,779 |
I've always wanted to live with a gay man.
hahahah anyways, like everyone had said, if they have been friends with you for so long, they probably have a hunch that you are one and are just waiting for you to tell them. Also unless they have really strong dissagreements with homosexuals, i'm sure they will be pretty understanding as long as.. there are soundproof walls and ground rules. good luck! |
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Feb 12 2008, 07:29 PM
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#11
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rawr? Group: Official Member Posts: 2,705 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 285,858 |
i suggest you simply tell them, tell them and give them a heads up. that you hope it doesn't effect your relationship between them. and i guess thats the bestest idea.
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| *paperplane* |
Feb 12 2008, 08:27 PM
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#12
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Guest |
Don't worry about the friendship. If they can't accept you, they're really not very good friends anyway.
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