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absence makes the heart grow fonder
Mini
post Jul 11 2007, 03:41 PM
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ACTUALLY. I have a proven answer to this.



Since I took psychology and all, uhm, hate to tell to you but absence DOES NOT make the heart grow fonder.

Being exposed to a person numerous times and seeing them alot actually makes you more attracted to him or her.

It's called the mere-exposure effect.

That's why most long distance relationships are hard to keep up. They're not impossible, but it's more difficult.


And unless you already have VERY strong feelings for a person and have memories or some sort of foundation, the whole absence makes the heart fonder is a total myth.
 
tr1pp1n
post Jul 12 2007, 12:11 AM
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please refuse to trust minis judgement as he is homosexual.
 
KayleighKins
post Jul 12 2007, 08:30 AM
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QUOTE(Mini @ Jul 11 2007, 04:41 PM) *
ACTUALLY. I have a proven answer to this.
Since I took psychology and all, uhm, hate to tell to you but absence DOES NOT make the heart grow fonder.


Lawl, whatever.
 
Mini
post Jul 12 2007, 08:45 AM
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QUOTE(tr1pp1n @ Jul 12 2007, 01:11 AM) *
please refuse to trust minis judgement as he is homosexual.



Pshhhhh. laugh.gif

QUOTE
Lawl, whatever.


OMG. I'm so serious. Go read a reliable psychology book. Sheesh.
 
S-Majere
post Jul 12 2007, 09:20 AM
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It's very true.

My boyfriend and I are soon to be going to separate universities; which means he is now working a lot of the time to get the cash he needs for basic living in.

When we're apart I still, after nearly a year of seeing each other almost constantly, find myself daydreaming about that time when I see him again. You tend to remember things more fondly, forget little transgressions and obsess to a certain extent about when you'll see each other again.

It's sort of like when you're planning to get something for ages; but when you've got the thing you covert most, you lose that excited feeling. I'm not saying people don't live up to expectations - just that when you're alone without something, that thing is what you want the most.

Edit// [mini]

Lawl! My friends are the same with that psychology rubbish. They think that because they have a grade in psycho-babble, they can shrink the rest of us. A perception of love changes with each individual, and the extent to which one will go for love is not based on some rigid theorem.
 
Mini
post Jul 12 2007, 09:22 AM
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QUOTE(S-Majere @ Jul 12 2007, 10:20 AM) *
It's very true.

My boyfriend and I are soon to be going to separate universities; which means he is now working a lot of the time to get the cash he needs for basic living in.

When we're apart I still, after nearly a year of seeing each other almost constantly, find myself daydreaming about that time when I see him again. You tend to remember things more fondly, forget little transgressions and obsess to a certain extent about when you'll see each other again.

It's sort of like when you're planning to get something for ages; but when you've got the thing you covert most, you lose that excited feeling. I'm not saying people don't live up to expectations - just that when you're alone without something, that thing is what you want the most.


Well, I guess it could be true for girls. But us guys, we're kind of different.

MERE-EXPOSURE EFFECT! I'm telling you.
 
S-Majere
post Jul 12 2007, 09:39 AM
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Lawl Mini, is that a generalisation for ALL guys?

I never thought I'd fall in love. To be truly honest, I figured it was just a trend thing for 13-year olds with low self-esteem.

But here I am, cartoony love-hearts blossoming in my eyes, ego the size of a planet, telling an entire subforum about it.

I don't believe in 'out of sight, out of mind' - after all you can't 'see' sex, but most guys crave it!

Psychologists (to raise up my side of the argument a little, into the realms of Indisputable Fact) found that the pain of a broken heart is just the same as a physical injury.
 
*steve330*
post Jul 12 2007, 09:42 AM
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QUOTE(S-Majere @ Jul 12 2007, 09:39 AM) *
- after all you can't 'see' sex, but most guys crave it!


I am pretty sure my imagination can prove you wrong.
 
S-Majere
post Jul 12 2007, 09:43 AM
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XD

But still, the argument still stands. Your uh...imagination....notwithstanding of course.
 
me1issaaaa
post Jul 12 2007, 09:45 AM
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Absolutely - you never get to appreciate exactly what you have/had, until you lose it.


I recently told my ex that I didn't want to have anything to do with him anymore, since all he did was lie and lie through his teeth. I'd threatened before whenever he screwed up, but I never had the balls to stand up for myself. I guess he assumed this would be the same, but I haven't gone back to him or had anything to do with him, and I don't plan to. I guess now it's starting to sink in, like, "Oh damn, she meant it this time." Aaaaand, there will be no going back. I'm happier without him.
 
Mini
post Jul 12 2007, 09:48 AM
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QUOTE(steve330 @ Jul 12 2007, 10:42 AM) *
I am pretty sure my imagination can prove you wrong.


HAHA!


This explains why guys have wet dreams.

QUOTE
Lawl! My friends are the same with that psychology rubbish. They think that because they have a grade in psycho-babble, they can shrink the rest of us. A perception of love changes with each individual, and the extent to which one will go for love is not based on some rigid theorem.


Go psychology students! Haha, sorry, it has been implanted in my mind and I can't stop thinking about it.

And love doesn't exist. You just want to make offspring in the end.






(I'm being sarcastic. Well, not really.)


laugh.gif
 
S-Majere
post Jul 12 2007, 09:49 AM
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*shakes head*

So you've been wondering all this time then Mini? laugh.gif
 
*steve330*
post Jul 12 2007, 09:51 AM
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QUOTE(S-Majere @ Jul 12 2007, 09:43 AM) *
XD

But still, the argument still stands. Your uh...imagination....notwithstanding of course.


I think most guys have similar imagining capabilities when it comes to sex.
 
Mini
post Jul 12 2007, 09:53 AM
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QUOTE(steve330 @ Jul 12 2007, 10:51 AM) *
I think most guys have similar imagining capabilities when it comes to sex.



I think we're digressing from the topic.

BUT omg.gif

Imagining sex = yahoo.gif


So trying to be a little more on the subject, uhm, I will stop exhausting the mere-exposure effect THEORY and agree with S-Majere on some of her points (since she has experience to back it up).
 
S-Majere
post Jul 12 2007, 09:58 AM
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I just sprayed biscuit crumbs all over my keyboard from laughing at that sex-manic smilie.

Interesting that you mention experience, Mini - have you any in the realm of puppy dogs, pink lollipops and other piss-poor metaphors for love?

I'm reminded of Red Dwarf.

'What is the theory of relativity?'
'Well, it's a theory innit?'
'But what is it actually?'
'Well...it's a theory....'
'Yeah?'
'It's a theory that you only tell your relatives'
 
Mini
post Jul 12 2007, 10:01 AM
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QUOTE(S-Majere @ Jul 12 2007, 10:58 AM) *
I just sprayed biscuit crumbs all over my keyboard from laughing at that sex-manic smilie.

Interesting that you mention experience, Mini - have you any in the realm of puppy dogs, pink lollipops and other piss-poor metaphors for love?

I'm reminded of Red Dwarf.

'What is the theory of relativity?'
'Well, it's a theory innit?'
'But what is it actually?'
'Well...it's a theory....'
'Yeah?'
'It's a theory that you only tell your relatives'



I apologize for making you do such a thing. I hope it's not too much trouble to clean your keyboard. biggrin.gif

Uhm, to answer your question honestly, no, not really. sad.gif
 
S-Majere
post Jul 12 2007, 10:28 AM
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Not at all Mini, there's all sorts down my keyoard here. It's like an entire eco-system and I'd probably be tried for mass genocide if I cleaned it out.

That's a crying shame. :( Nevermind, it took me 18 years to wrestle mine to the ground and scream 'SUBMIT' before Cupid fired an arrow into my ass...
 
chibichi15
post Jul 12 2007, 10:52 AM
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Hmmm, I find it true. When I've been away from someone for such a long time, it makes me elated to see them again. But that's just me. happy.gif
 

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