Dear cB Diary,, Createblog Diary no. 10 Options

[ashleybby]

dear cb
today i found out that him and his gf broke up. i was the happiest i have been in a long time. but then i went and read his messages, and they were talking to each other like thats the end of the world because they "love" each other and they are meant to be. and they told each other they would leave anyone to be together again. it pissed me off because they had only dated for like, what? a week? geeze. it made me mad. because if me and him get back together, he would leave me. i want more than anything to be with him again, but then i thought about it. what if he does the same thing he already did? sometimes it makes me wonder if he actually did love me. he says he still does, but if you love someone, you wouldnt be doing that. all this drama is really making me an angry/depressed person. i am tired of it. in one of his messages to her he said he wished he didnt move up there. and that made me happy. i wish he never moved either. all this wouldnt have happened and i would still be the happiest girl , like i used to be. he also told her he might be moving if he doesnt get this one job.i hope he doesnt get it. i dont care if i sound selfish. i want him back. and i want him to be mine. but today me and him were texting. and i smiled through it all. because it wasnt the usual one word answers that he has been putting. so it made me extra happy. i cant wait till wednesday. i hope he realizes he made a mistake about leaving me and will want to be with me again. but i dont know. a girl could wish right? we will see what happens.

-ashley

[datass]

Dear cB diary,

I wish i remembered all the math shit i learned before so this revision wouldn't kill my brain so badly as it is right now. I also wish i can stop slacking off so I can finish my revision for my math exam. I am really not looking forward to it. Simultaneous equations and square roots are the worse things in the world.

[Jinny]

Dear cB Diary,

My teeth really hurt. I don't know WHAT the orthodontist/dentist did to my teeth, but they ache like hell. UGH I CAN'T EAT ANYTHING EITHER. HOW AM I GOING TO PLAY TOMORROW?! WTF? UGH THIS HURTS SO MUCH

[DarkInsanityxx]

Dear cB Diary,

Well let's see so Far everything in school is awsome!!! i love it. Except the finals..f**king finals xD well anywho i had fun yesturday although my left foot was hurting like hell cause in gym my damn gym teacher wouldnt let me change my sneakers, i fell and my foot just bent...that hurt!!!! but after a while i thought it was ok cause i walked fine but then as i was walking with my brother Leon and his friend Kristina that pain started to come back omg that thing hurttt xD but it was funny how i fell. Also about the BF problem...i still miss him you know dont get me wrong, but i see him everyday and we talk like normal friends even though he knows as well i still have a big feeling for him still but i'll just leave it alone cause as long as he stays my friend thats how i can be ok right...?

-Kami

[Jinny]

Dear cB Diary,

Ahh yesterday was a great night! I hope we all get to do that again. It was really scary but funny too.. We also talked a lot about ______ which made me happy for some reason, I don't know why. It sort of boosted up my energy.. lol. I HOPE WE DO THAT AGAIN NEXT WEEK!

[*stephinika*]

Dear cB diary,

Excuse me while I stab myself in the eye.
That's what my mother makes me want to do to myself. UGH. One day, one godamn day I will be able to tell her to shut up and she won't be able to do a damn thing about it.
Seriously. I'm ready to scream at her.

[iDecay]

Dear cB Diary,

It'd odd how I can feel so comfortable talking to him. I haven't felt like this in a while. He's the only person who actually understands my rambles and non-sense talk. Maybe she was right.. But starting to like him is the last thing I should do right now..

Oh, and dealing with friends breakups is confusing. Thank god for my wide knowledge of songs.

[oXMuhNirvanaXo]

Dear cb.. thinger..

Ok, I forgave him but I feel like I am falling into a trap. In my mind this is not good. I mean yeah I wanna be his friend but I still think he thinks that I like him which I don't. I like my boiyfriend that I have been dating for the past year and eight months. -sigh- I called him and told him that I don't love him the way I love Travis. I love him as a friend. I hope he understands and does not get pissy with me. That would be bad.

- Shelby

[iGio]

Dear cB diary,

Excuse me while I stab myself in the eye.
That's what my mother makes me want to do to myself. UGH. One day, one godamn day I will be able to tell her to shut up and she won't be able to do a damn thing about it.
Seriously. I'm ready to scream at her.

Been there so many times.Feel better steph</3

[flutterby88]

she's right. we're grown up and we can make our own f**king decisions. partly why i had to distance myself from them, i didn't agree with their decisions but it wasn't my place to tell them what to do. but you know, sometimes i wonder if it's absolutely pointless, me caring so damn much. otherwise i wouldn't have cried on the phone with him for over an hour last night. i kinda wish i had never brought her to that first party, now she's hooked on partying with my older friends and every time, she seems to be making out with someone new. and that someone new is someone who'll make out with ANYONE that throws herself at him. she's building up such a bad reputation and she's better than that, i don't want my friends to think badly of her. but who am i to tell her to stop? and then there's him. that really hurt. i thought he knew how i felt about that, but not only did he do it anyway, he comes on the phone and tells me he wants me to come. like i actually would've been able to stand seeing him like that. i called later on in the night once i thought he wouldn't be high any more, and he admitted he'd done it, but didn't seem bothered by it. maybe he still wasn't thinking straight. i don't know. or maybe he forgot that night we talked for hours because he was sorry and was so scared i'd never talk to him again. it's one thing if S or H or even N does it, much as i don't want them to. but F is so much smarter than that, and if he keeps doing it because he thinks it's really not that bad, i'm so scared he'll start doing it more often and end up f**king himself over. funny how things can change in 24 hours. one night we go out and have so much fun, just the two of us. and the next night he makes me want to rip his head off. it's a good thing D got sick and we had to go home, cuz if i had ended up going to the party instead i would've been so devastated. A says the way that i care so much is what makes me such a good friend, and he doesn't want that to change about me, and he feels the same way, and that i mustn't stop caring. but does he care? does he even realize how much it hurts me to know he does that? i love him and look up to him so much, we've become such close friends like i always wanted us to be, so yes, i f**king care. but he can make his own decisions right? i don't know what to do. i feel like it's not my place to tell him i want him to stop, cuz i can't tell him what to do. but he's my friend. i'm also scared i'm making this a big deal when it's not, maybe he's not causing that much harm to himself. but if he does it more often then he will. i'm tired of surprises, i'm sick of thinking i know someone really well and then finding out that my advice is worthless to them. but hey, it's not my place to say anything, but i can't promise i won't stop caring

[Jinny]

Dear cB Diary,

I loved today. I think I did pretty well & confidently (yay!) Now everythings over, and all I have to do is relax for a few months and then get ready again Well, all that practicing was worth it. Agh.. I'm craving lemonade right now Anyways, today was a great day

[ashleybby]

dear cb,
yesterday i cried basically all day. his feelings cant change in a week, no matter how many times he tells me that. i dont believe him. and then we got into 2 pretty deep conversations. they werent happy ones, but they still made me happy. because that was the first time we actually talked about something really serious, and it made me feel closer to him. i just hope he realizes how much i care about him. and i hope that when he comes to vegas, he will realize he still has feelings for me. i shouldnt get my hopes up though. i do that too often, and i know what it feels like when things dont go how i hope they would go. so i dont even want to think about that, so then i wont be dissapointed when he comes to town. but we will be hanging out basically the whole time he is here, so hopefully, our relationship could start being fixed.
i dont know. right now i just want to stay positive about everything
i love that boy more than i love myself. it will be impossible for him to find anyone else out there that will love him as much as i do. i can promise that.
-ashley

[Jinny]

Dear cB Diary,

Ahh today was awesomee Everything was perfect. But oral presentations tomorrow... ugh. Can't wait until school ends.. JUNE 22!

[michellerrific]

dear cbd,

Thank goodness for summer. Hm. Nothing much has been happening lately, like usual. Why thank goodness for summer? Not just of vacations and of free time. I prefer to be away from all the people that i can't stand to be around, to talk to, to have assumptions about...I was tired of that in the middle of the school year. I'm glad that's not here anymore...for now.

[*Kathleen*]

Dear cB Diary,

I got to hang out with two of the coolest cBers tonight. I was really sad that the other coolest cBer was SLEEPING and couldn't chill with us at Denny's. SHAME ON YOU.

kathleen.

[*mzkandi*]

cB diary,

My finals.....are kicking my ass!


-K

[alysaphobia]

Dear cB Diary,

I'm exhausted; mentally AND physically. Physically because volleyball camp is a total ferkfa... mentally because I miss A, and because summer reading assignment is getting on my nerves. So much for an enjoyable summer.... I'm actually more busy than I'd be while school is in session.

I can't wait until I actually get to do some travelling/shopping! The U.S with S is going to freaking rock. I've missed her so, so much and it's really cool that we're actually getting to hang out just like last summer.... YAY.

Alysa

[iGio]

Dear cb,

I feel sick.I'm going to throw up,the starvation is only getting worse.Well yesturday yahira said I should stop wearing big shirts because I wore a thin one and like she said i look mad skinny.Which I agreed to.Also I feel bad,chris,jr,tiny,and efrain got arrested D:<.My mom tried to get the cops to let them go because my brother saw what happened but instead she convinced them to just call their parents so they wouldn't have to do time.Good thing I was walking over there or we would've never known.

Agh I just swallowed it back down.I had a bad morning,woke up with morning wood which wouldnt go away the whole morning.Then one of my head phone ear pieces broke AGAIN! now i have to beg my mom for 14.08 To buy a new pair.While walking to school also these morena's were in a huge crowd walking and im behind them y'know blasting my reggaethon and one turns around and looks at me and says something to her friend.See this why they get their damn weaves pulled out.She lucky I wasn't feeling good either or I would have got stephanie and it would have been on.Right now im blasting Noche de sexo.I'm bored.But I'm so happy today is my last day.I would go in tomorrow,but for what?To hear mr.kane b-tch and whine about me missing 3 hw's hah.No thanks.

Tomorrow the game I want comes out.Gotta call my dad to ask him to buy it for me.If he says no then i'll go to my mom :D.one of them has to say yes,I mean,i'm spoiled so you can't say no to me.Now i'm blastin Bein Bellaca.Though i'm enjoying the music,I feel really sick.I have to barf and I know as soon as I walk into my house its gonna come up.I guess i'll eat a bowl of cereal with a orange and orange juice.Then hmm,nothing to do :'(.WAIT kristina didnt go to school :DDD YAYY.Now we can hang out and act whory.Hmmm should I tell my dad to buy me that hot black camera?Hmmmmmmmmmmmm.-thinks-Yep NEW CAMERA FOR ME.

-Leon

[DarkInsanityxx]

Dear cB Diary,

Ok so yeah i went to school today but left right after 4th why? simple girl issues with myself...it uhhh sorta embrassing but most of you should get the point. Anywho right about now im very bored and f**king sh*t i cant go downstairs because they are constructing on my buildings stairs. well i can go downstairs but like its creepy how you have to go down. Anywho im really not feeling well but i do wanna hang out but i doubt i will cause theres no one to hang out with....-TEARS-

[Jinny]

Dear cB Diary,

I can't wait until I get out of school. All this work is stressing me outtt I hate school and the assignments. I HATE ORAL PRESENTATIONS. I hate him. I hate her. I hate how she always backstabs people. I hate how we have so many projects. I hate how I SUCKKKKK at math and our final is going to count as part of our math grade. I'm already working really hard on the extra credit project so I can bring my average to a B+ or an A-. But this final is gonna f*cking ruin my whole entire grade. AND I'm going to get in so much trouble. IHATESCHOOL&IHATELIFE.

[ashleybby]

dear cb,
i only got three hourse of sleep. i feel like absolute crap, and i got really upset earlier. i am happy to know that he misses her more than he misses me. its dumb he is acting like a love sick puppy to her. they only went out for a week. and then he says he is broken?? okay, no, you are not. so stop trying to get sympathy. because i am the one who is so broken, i probably wont fall in love again. you broke my heart and i am left in the dust and your complaining because you cant ever see her?? give me a break. do you even care about how i feel anymore?? i cried almost all day today and i still have to go to the mall to get his present.
i was miserable, but then my phone rang and it was him! i was so happy. we could only talk for like 2 minutes because he had work, but it turned my day around. i was seriously happy. and he told me he might be coming to town tomorrow instead of wednesday :D so excited for that. i am going to try and make the days that he is here amazing. just for him. i cant wait till i see him tomorrow.
-ashley

[*stephinika*]

Dear cB diary,

Woo, so today actually turned out pretty good, even with some things that didn't go quite as planned.
Went to his place and woke him up and hung out for awhile then headed over to the passport office...the line only took me half an hour...it was awesome! I was expecting 3 hours...but then my mom apparently didn't know I needed my damn citizenship card as well so I'm going back tomorrow...but its another day out with him so that nice. Then we went to the mall and did some AE shopping which was fun and got some new fishies before heading over to his place to hang out again...took a nap. It was quite nice.
Tomorrow will be lovely too I'm sure. Yaay.

[minioligo]

dear cb diary,
i always ask myself if i hadn't chosen them over them,
would things be better?
would i be happier?
would i have trustworthy friends?
i hate how i have to split them apart.

i'm scared. i'm really scared that by next year, i'll have nobody.

[*The Markster*]

Dear cB Diary,

I love you.

- Mark.

[ashleybby]

dear cb
i am very glad he called me three times today. and i am looking forward to tomorrow. definitly. its going to be the first time in a loooong time that i will actually have a good day. :D i need to clean tho.
maybe i will pull an all-nighter of cleaning. these next couple of days are going to be amazing and he will see how much i care about him. im going to forget about the drama while he is here and just enjoy his company
i love that boy way too much.
-ashley