my gf is wild |
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 Apr 27 2007, 09:27 AM
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#1
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Newbie  Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2007 Member No: 518,201  |
Thanks alot guys, now it turns out she went to a party on wed. before she went in, i called, we talked about her "grinding" her ass on other guys while dancing(u know like hip-hop music), because we discussed a few days ago, that I am NOT comfortable with that shit at all. n she said she wont, that she just wants to dance spanish music and wont "grind" on anyone, now that I call, I ask, so your not gonna grind on any guys. and she says, is there a problem if I do. we talked and she had all intentions to, she said she wasnt going to though, now a few days later, she tells me she actually did "grind" on some guy. how am I supposed to trust someone like that? I love this girl, but cant stand the lies and deceits, and dont know if we can make it. she says I can trust her, and to put trust in her to test her out, but theres no point, I keep doing it, and she keeps failing. miserably, every time. Should I just end this and spare all emotions feelings and everything from going even further? Or try and find a way to stay together and edure this heartache and find a way to build trust together. She wants to be young wild and independent, I want to build a life together. I am turning 22 next month, shes 20 y.o. freshmen in college. She's def. a keeper, not like any i've found, thats for sure.
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| *kryogenix* |
Apr 27 2007, 12:20 PM
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#2
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Throw some Ds on that bitch.
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Apr 27 2007, 03:00 PM
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#3
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 yan lin♥ Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 14,129 Joined: Apr 2004 Member No: 13,627 |
If you can't trust her, then why are you staying with her?
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| *Podomaht* |
Apr 27 2007, 03:15 PM
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#4
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QUOTE(kryogenix @ Apr 27 2007, 1:20 PM)  Throw some Ds on that bitch.
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Apr 28 2007, 07:58 AM
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#5
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Newbie Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2007 Member No: 518,201 |
throw some d's????
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Apr 28 2007, 09:05 AM
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#6
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 damn, right! Group: Member Posts: 368 Joined: Jul 2005 Member No: 174,547 |
We're kinda in the situation, except I'm a girl. Hmm... I'm not really sure what's right and what is wrong with this, but I think if the talking doesn't do anything maybe you should think about your relationship again. I talked to my guy and he still does his bad habit a bit but I can see he's really trying not to.
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Apr 28 2007, 09:06 AM
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#7
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te quiero Group: Banned Posts: 472 Joined: Sep 2006 Member No: 467,840 |
So, I read this thread and your other thread and here's what i have to say...
A lot of my friends tried to make relationships work with boyfriends/girlfriends that left for college and only one or two actually did stay together. If you don't have absolute, 100% trust in your girl, there's really no point in keeping the relationship up because otherwise, you're going to worry all the time, accuse her of doing things you don't want her to do, and sooner or later, she's going to get sick of it. I think the best thing you can do is turn your relationship into an open relationship for a while - let her and you both test the waters and start seeing other people without feeling any guilt, etc. That way, when she's back with you and she still wants to be with you, you'll know that whatever type of relationship you two have is real. But the thing is, most people aren't comfortable with "open relationships" and since you seem like the jealous type of boyfriend, you probably wont go for it. Just take a break from the relationship, let her do what she wants with other people... and in the end, if she still comes back to you, then it's pretty obvious who she wants to be with. |
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Apr 28 2007, 11:03 AM
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#8
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 ♥ Group: Official Member Posts: 4,066 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 18,393 |
You sound just like my boyfriend, it's scary.
Okay. The girl is gonna do what she wants to do. Why didn't you go with her to the party? If you weren't there, especially if she wanted you to go, you don't have a right to tell her what she can and can't do. This is nothing - it's JUST DANCING. I'm sorry, I've just been going through something really similar to this with my own boy, and I'm sick of the subject. I apologize if I sound rude at all, it just really hits close to home with me and my own problem. |
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 28 2007, 11:47 AM
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#9
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I'd have to agree with Melissa. It IS just a form of dancing. BUt if you feel uncomfortable with her doing it, maybe you should attend the parties with her to assure yourself what she means by trusting her. But, its all up to you. If you have a problem with it, you should confront her about it and tell her you're serious. The break idea always works too.
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Apr 28 2007, 11:53 AM
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#10
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te quiero Group: Banned Posts: 472 Joined: Sep 2006 Member No: 467,840 |
QUOTE(xoxo_koala_kisses_ @ Apr 28 2007, 11:03 AM) You sound just like my boyfriend, it's scary. Okay. The girl is gonna do what she wants to do. Why didn't you go with her to the party? If you weren't there, especially if she wanted you to go, you don't have a right to tell her what she can and can't do. This is nothing - it's JUST DANCING. I'm sorry, I've just been going through something really similar to this with my own boy, and I'm sick of the subject. I apologize if I sound rude at all, it just really hits close to home with me and my own problem. ... I thought he said this was a long-distance relationship so he couldn't have gone with her. I agree with what you said about just dancing, though. He was over-reacting a little... or a lot. |
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Apr 28 2007, 03:04 PM
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#11
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 Kimberly Group: Member Posts: 1,961 Joined: Apr 2005 Member No: 121,599 |
Sorry, but she kinda sounds like a whore.
 Maybe its time to kick her to the curb? |
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Apr 28 2007, 06:13 PM
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#12
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♥ Group: Official Member Posts: 4,066 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 18,393 |
QUOTE(funk.this @ Apr 28 2007, 12:53 PM) ... I thought he said this was a long-distance relationship so he couldn't have gone with her. I agree with what you said about just dancing, though. He was over-reacting a little... or a lot. Long-distance? Ohh. I must have read over that part, whoops. But still. |
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| *suddenly she* |
Apr 28 2007, 09:24 PM
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#13
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You're not comfortable with your girl grinding with a guy. You let her know. She says she won't. Before the party, she doesn't see a problem with it, so she goes ahead and grinds away.
She lied to you by saying she wouldn't. She's done it before. She apparently doesn't place enough value in what you're not comfortable with. Right before the party, she's all "I don't see the problem with it," even though you two have already discussed it and you've made your point. If it's a problem with you, it's a problem with her as well. What kind of girlfriend is that? QUOTE She wants to be young wild and independent, I want to build a life together That basically speaks for itself. And if you think she's such a keeper, then don't bother asking us what to do. But IMO? She's not worth it. |
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May 3 2007, 10:10 AM
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#14
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Newbie Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2007 Member No: 518,201 |
Anything else guys? She comes back home on monday from college for 3 months, then she's out again, but she'll be working and at school during these months, so itll be the same thing anyway. she told me at first shes only going to school that far because of sports, it turns out, if it doesnt go well, she still wants to stay over THERE clear cross the country in the mid west, while i'm in the east coast, too damn far. dont u think its for a reason? She wants to live her life, she doesnt want to live with me, at least not for a year after college. And damn, I want to start a dam life already. I wanna buy a house, and do alotta other stuff. Who the hell wants to come home to an empty house? I sure as heck dont.
Anything else guys? She comes back home on monday from college for 3 months, then she's out again, but she'll be working and at school during these months, so itll be the same thing anyway. she told me at first shes only going to school that far because of sports, it turns out, if it doesnt go well, she still wants to stay over THERE clear cross the country in the mid west, while i'm in the east coast, too damn far. dont u think its for a reason? She wants to live her life, she doesnt want to live with me, at least not for a year after college. And damn, I want to start a dam life already. I wanna buy a house, and do alotta other stuff. Who the hell wants to come home to an empty house? I sure as heck dont. |
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| *Podomaht* |
May 3 2007, 11:40 AM
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#15
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QUOTE(jayjota3133 @ Apr 28 2007, 8:58 AM) throw some d's????
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May 3 2007, 01:20 PM
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#16
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 The kooks Group: Member Posts: 499 Joined: Apr 2007 Member No: 516,563 |
QUOTE(My Cinderella. @ Apr 28 2007, 5:47 PM) I'd have to agree with Melissa. It IS just a form of dancing. BUt if you feel uncomfortable with her doing it, maybe you should attend the parties with her to assure yourself what she means by trusting her. But, its all up to you. If you have a problem with it, you should confront her about it and tell her you're serious. The break idea always works too. No. You see there's dancing for money and other things like that, then there's dancing to arouse other men and get your own kicks. What do you think she's doing? It's obvious hence why this guy is uncomfortable. Seriously, if I was a gal, I would never ever grind my ass into someone only if I was single and wanted a wild night out. I mean come on, would you girls like it if your man was getting up close and personal with other girls while dancing. Anyways, if you can't trust this gal then it's probably for the best that you two leave eachother. She wants to do her own thing. |
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May 3 2007, 01:53 PM
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#17
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Member Group: Member Posts: 29 Joined: May 2007 Member No: 521,080 |
trust is a big issue. but then again so is respect. if she cant respect ur wishes for her not to grind on guys and the fact that u might not be able to trust her because of it.. you need to let her know that ur not going to deal with that. its bullshit not to be able to trust someone and to have ur boyfriend or girlfriend not respecting ur opinions and feelings. dont take that shit. its not fair to you.
QUOTE(BiALiCiOUS @ May 3 2007, 11:52 AM) trust is a big issue. but then again so is respect. if she cant respect ur wishes for her not to grind on guys and the fact that u might not be able to trust her because of it.. you need to let her know that ur not going to deal with that. its bullshit not to be able to trust someone and to have ur boyfriend or girlfriend not respecting ur opinions and feelings. dont take that shit. its not fair to you. wow i should really listen to myself 
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May 3 2007, 02:56 PM
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#18
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 Hi, Im Brook. Group: Member Posts: 1,774 Joined: Mar 2007 Member No: 508,383 |
QUOTE(suddenly she @ Apr 28 2007, 10:24 PM) You're not comfortable with your girl grinding with a guy. You let her know. She says she won't. Before the party, she doesn't see a problem with it, so she goes ahead and grinds away. She lied to you by saying she wouldn't. She's done it before. She apparently doesn't place enough value in what you're not comfortable with. Right before the party, she's all "I don't see the problem with it," even though you two have already discussed it and you've made your point. If it's a problem with you, it's a problem with her as well. What kind of girlfriend is that? That basically speaks for itself. Agreed QUOTE(jayjota3133 @ Apr 27 2007, 10:27 AM) She wants to be young wild and independent, I want to build a life together. This speaks for its self she wants to be young and INDEPENDENT so why bother being with her if she wants to be independednt plus if you dont trust her why continue dating her? |
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May 4 2007, 12:25 PM
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#19
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 Seisuke Group: Member Posts: 289 Joined: Nov 2005 Member No: 283,523 |
some ppl just like to dance...
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May 4 2007, 11:30 PM
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#20
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Newbie Group: Member Posts: 7 Joined: Apr 2007 Member No: 518,201 |
some people just like to dance? some people just like to f-ck
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May 5 2007, 02:57 PM
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#21
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 295 Joined: May 2007 Member No: 521,658 |
drop her nicely enough to leave it open for a come back. sounds like she's currently way to promiscuous to handle a relationship
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