Christianity and Sex, ... I just want to know how other Christians interpret this Options

[expoised]

It'd be really great if the Christians would reply to this topic, because I'm relating sex to Christianity... not to "OMG, Christianity is stupid and blah blah blah don't listen to the Bible, blah blah blah". But do what you will, it doesn't really matter.

I'm non-denominational, but I'm going to a Methodist church (Just clearing that up, because I'm pretty sure different sects see this differently). We just had a series of sermons about marriage, and as part of this series, the pastor talked about sex.

Basically, what he said is that sex is not a bad thing. It's a pleasure that God created for us and something meant for us to actually enjoy. It's like a gift. The thing about sex is that when done properly (properly as in with your spouse, or someone you love) it's a beautiful thing, but when people take the "gift" of sex and turn it into trash, then it can become destructive.

So many people view Christianity as "be abstinate because if you're not, that's a sin, etc etc etc." But, if you really think about it...

Sex CAN be destructive when abused. I'm sure there are tons of people here who have regretted having sex with a certain person from time to time.

And at the same time, with the right person and at the right time, sex is beautiful.



How do you interpret Christianity and it's view on sex?

[bobby james]

I think it's on point, it's saying sex is good but wait until marriage because it knows the effects that come from it if you don't and I see too many people regretting or when they're married comparing their sex partner to some old freaking boyfriend/girlfriend they used to have. There's so much to say about this.

I think it's on point.

[Kontroll]

Well, basically sex inside the confines of marriage, according to the Bible, is correct. Not with just some one you love. Christianity is a religion of selflessness. Sexual pleasures take your mind of things such as what God wants with your life. Sex is destructive as in it is addictive. Yes, God made sex and he wants us to enjoy it. If it wasn't then there would be no purpose of having sex then to reproduce and it would be a burden to all if it wasn't pleasurable. But the main thing is that according to the Bible, sex is thought of as a sin if it's not inside the confines of marriage.

But it's not like God will curse you for having sex. He forgives those who have sinned, but I'm not using this as an excuse for people to just go have sex guilt free. You have to be sinscere about forgiveness.

That's just the view I've been brought up to believe. And I think it's right. Statistically women who have waited to have sex until marriage have found it much more pleasurable than those who have already had sex before marriage.

[demolished]

Basically, what he said is that sex is not a bad thing. It's a pleasure that God created for us and something meant for us to actually enjoy. It's like a gift. The thing about sex is that when done properly (properly as in with your spouse, or someone you love) it's a beautiful thing, but when people take the "gift" of sex and turn it into trash, then it can become destructive.

Sex isnt beautiful, when you get get raped.

it's an unexpected gift ... and turn it into trash, it can become destructive.





explain that.

[starlette]

Sex isnt beautiful, when you get get raped.

it's an unexpected gift ... and turn it into trash, it can become destructive.





explain that.

She said when done properly with someone you love it is beautiful.

okay so, I studied this for a long time. I think of myself as a good Christian by my own standards. I don't attend church because I was tired of the pressure of things like "do communion once a month" at one church and "no you can't do communion unless you are baptized into the church and only do it once a year" at the next church. And I kept thinking is this going to keep me out of heaven? I hope not. If god is sitting up there tallying all the communions I should have taken, I might as well give up now. so I left all that crap behind and I worship on my own time. Having said that...

I have been sexually active since I was 15, and at that time I didn't care. I care now though. I'm in a 4 year relationship with the man I plan on marrying. but I cant and wont for a lot of reasons. So I had to find some answers on sex outside of marriage and all that. Heres what I have found. no where in the bible does it actually say you have to save yourself for marriage.

What a lot of people don't understand is that marriage was not the holy ceremony that it is today. It was a business transaction. Fathers gave their daughters as wives in exchange for land and things. The only reference to punishment in regards to sex, was in regards to lowering property value. If you are giving half of your land away for say a car, do you want a nice brand new never been used car, or do you want one thats been driven aruond the country a few times. you want the best right? So its the same with women. girls who were vigins were worth more because they were pure and unused. Clean. You know how men like new toys. :) SO! for a man to lie with a woman was basically stealing from her father, and her future husband. Because you were lowering her value.

THE ONLY TIME IN THE ENTIRE BIBLE SEX AND MARRIAGE ARE RECOMMENDED (I'm serious, the only time) is when Paul was addressing the Romans I think (dont hold me to that i forgot). they were having sex rituals in these temples and Paul was like, dude, if you gotta f**k so much, please, take a wife. Now, I don't know about you, but God is pretty direct in the bible. Don't steal, don't cheat, don't lie, etc etc. Why did God never say flat out, don't have sex outside of wedlock. Because that is a stigma brought about years after the bible was written. People feared sex so much, that it became this evil thing. Much like alcohol, (let us remember Jesus' first miracle, turn water to wine) sex is only dangerous when abused. and people abused it needless to say. And so the leaders of the church, like they have been known to do throughout history, manipulated the texts to say hese things. The Verses they use to support this aren't even in the same chapters. It goes to show you can make words mean anything. and its very true in this case.

I honestly believe that if God wanted sex to be so bad and it was so important to save for marriage, it would have been said there in black and white. Gods rules are so specific. Thats one reason I love to be a Christian. I can read the bible and I can understand what God wants from me. So why would God be so vague on this issue? i mean, the book of solomon is chock full of sexually explicit verses, so much that it was removed from the bible for a long period of time. This is what man has done. Just as man has made the gift of sex dirty, hurtful, and dangerous.

The reason I did all of this research (I'm talking a month or so) is because personally I was so conflicted about my actions. I love my boyfriend, and we have been together for 4 years, and we just arent ready to get married. We don't want to get married until we are ready to settle down and have a family, and because of my career, I won't be ready to do that for many years. And we are young and cant afford to support a family. but many people younger than us who have dated for a fourth of the time are already married with kids. And so I felt some mixed feelings about sex with him and then staying in good graces with God. So I just started learning. I figured God would give me the right answer. My boyfriend and I were both raised religious, and so if I said hey, I feel like I am sinning, I don't want to do this, he would 100% support me. So I asked God to lead me and I found so much information. and the biggest point is that, there was no white dress. There was no great ceremony. There wasn't even lovehalf the time. It was business. Strictly busniess. So I know for a fact that most of the women in the United states arent being married off by their fathers to men twice their age for a business deal, so the old ways don't apply. And back then, if you broke the rule and had sex outside of marriage, you were either stealing from the father or husband like I said, and you were stoned. No one is stoning people in the streets. And taking into account what Paul said about the men having too much sex, was for them to take a wife if they must have sex all the time. I think that just shows to refrain from doing it in excess. and of course we as a society never know when to stop, and so I think in that case the same applies to us today. Moderation. Because anything good can become bad in excess. oxygen can be bad in excess, and we need it to live. and Paul had a reputation for being very blunt and brutal. and he didn't say "take your sins you whore and go beg for forgiveness" he said "if yuo can't stop having sex, go get a wife and do her all the time." of course not in so many words lol. But Paul was the finger pointer. He called people sinners right and left and told people to repent, and why in this case was he so lenient? so yeah. Thats all I have to say.

[expoised]

You just took everything that's been swimming around in my mind and put it down in words that I have never been able to form.

I completely agree with you. What God wants from us, he states plainly in words we can understand. He doesn't try to "trick" us or say "Ohhh,... let's write this down and see if they can figure it out!"

And many people say that Adultery is part of the 10 commandments so "you can't have sex before marriage!" ... But the definition of adultery is basically sex with someone that's married. It's unfaithfullness, ... not sex before marriage.

And it's funny... my pastor used the Paul reference in his sermon about sex and marriage.

[*kryogenix*]

From the Cathecism:

2353 Fornication is carnal union between an unmarried man and an unmarried woman. It is gravely contrary to the dignity of persons and of human sexuality which is naturally ordered to the good of spouses and the generation and education of children. Moreover, it is a grave scandal when there is corruption of the young.

2391 Some today claim a "right to a trial marriage" where there is an intention of getting married later. However firm the purpose of those who engage in premature sexual relations may be, "the fact is that such liaisons can scarcely ensure mutual sincerity and fidelity in a relationship between a man and a woman, nor, especially, can they protect it from inconstancy of desires or whim." Carnal union is morally legitimate only when a definitive community of life between a man and woman has been established. Human love does not tolerate "trial marriages." It demands a total and definitive gift of persons to one another.

No premarital sex, according to the Cathecism.

[expoised]

But then again, Catholics have always been weird...































haha jk, jk...

[*digital.fragrance*]

Sex before marriage (during engagement, with a partner, with a lover) is wrong. So basically, have sex with you spouse and thats it. Sure sex is a wonderful thing, and it's even more wonderful with one person only...

[demolished]

Sex before marriage (during engagement, with a partner, with a lover) is wrong. So basically, have sex with you spouse and thats it. Sure sex is a wonderful thing, and it's even more wonderful with one person only...

Are you sure?

[starlette]

Sex before marriage (during engagement, with a partner, with a lover) is wrong. So basically, have sex with you spouse and thats it. Sure sex is a wonderful thing, and it's even more wonderful with one person only...

I would have to respectfully disagree.

Many experts say a huge percent ofpeople who save themseves for marriage wind up unhappy with their love lives because...well theyre awful. And a lot find themselves wanting to experiment outside of the relationship or just not make love at all because they are unfufilled. And when it comes down to it, other than in catholicism, where they write their own rules, where is your point based from?

Besides, I'm glad I had sex before I got in my long term, might-as-well be married relationship, because I was learning with the other people, and they never got my best, and now that I'm happy and comfortable, I'm also confident and our experience is very enjoyable. I mean yes, there were some I regret, but a lot of us regret meeting people, so its no different in my eyes, except that it was wasted time and basicaly I didnt appreciate myself enough with those people.

And I'm not angry or defensive (everyone thinks I'm defensive when I post, I dont get it lol) but I wonder where you get your basis for "sex before marriage is wrong." I mean it would be one thing if you could say, here in this book this person says "and God adds the eleventh commandment, sex before marriage is wrong" but thats not there. Also, since the constitution of marriage that we know today is different than what marriage was when the bible was written, technically no one today would be allowed to have sex because theyre version of marriage isnt the same version referred to in the bible.

Also, think of the people who get married only for someones money. They enter the marriage dishonestly, pretending to want to be faithful. One of the people doesnt even love the other. They would be allowed to have sex over say, someone like me who is madly in love with my partner and has been with him for four years, and our relationship is honest and pure? Pain will come from the marriage based on lies, whereas we both are happy and not in pain, and are not married.

what about people who still believe in arranged marriages? A young woman is forced to marry a man she doesnt love, and have sex with him to bring his and her family a legacy. Isnt that wrong? Wouldnt she live her life with emotional pain? Versus two consenting adults who love eachother and want to marry in the future?

What if the one you think is the love of your life runs off to the military, and you fear you will lose them so you get married and have sex and all that. Then he comes home and leaves you because hes alive. Think of the pain that would cause. Waiting for 4 years, giving yourself to ghet one you love and being betrayed.

The reason I bring up all these points is because the church has manipulated sex into something that is only safe when you are married. But it can be just as dangerous and hurtful inside of marriage as well, and then techinically the bible would be supporting that. so many young people are, in my opinion, brainwashed to beleive that their sexuality is wrong, and they grow up, get married, and still never experence the amazing and powerful gift sex is. Many kids hurry up and get married just so they can have sex, and wind up hurt and alone, a lot of them with children they have to raise on their own. The whole "no sex before marriage" is almost as dangerous as unwanted sex. Because it creates desire. many peopel ban things they feel are wrong, and by banning them find they grow in popularity. Think marajuana. Most people know if marajuana was legal, half the kids who smoke it regularly now wouldnt have touched the stuff. I find that is it destructive to our youth to promote no sex before marriage. Many people lose the one they truly love before they get married, and never love again. Are they lost to the gift of sex? And what about people who have multiple marriages, they technically are then entitled to sleep around because theyve married 6 people, so they could, in the eyes of God, have 6 sexual partners.

As a Christian, God makes things very simple. Don't let something take his place. And if you are running around have sex with everyone you meet, God is not on your mind. Unless you are sick. And there are many who, whithin the confines of marriage, let sex take God place as well. It just as addictive between two married people as it is between two people dating, or two people who just met. Like I said with alcohol, it is not ungodly to drink, but it is wrong to drink so much that you're life focuses on alcohol, and not God. and I know from personal experience that I don't let sex interfere with my relationship with God, and I'm going it with person I beleive he destined for me, and thats wrong?

[*mipadi*]

Christianity and sex has a very interesting history—nearly as interesting as the combination of religion and sex in general. Prior to Christianity, Roman religion had a pretty good balance of sexuality and spirituality. Sex and spirituality both were healthy.

Of course, that changed once Constantine converted. In essence, Rome was threated by barbarian hordes. Christianity preached faithfulness to one person, which led to marriage, which led to babies, which led to people—the perfect antidote to roving hordes of barbarians.

The rest, as they say, is history.

[*This Confession*]

Yea, Sex isn't a bad thing. I just don't think people that aren't married know the proper consquences and are willing to take them. I"M NOT SAYING this to everyone. Some people that aren't married I'm very proud of and knew the consquences and the facts. I mean if your not married and you want to have sex, simply get married. Just remember marriage isn't a simple thing. Sex isn't a horrible thing though. I mean I suppose if you do have before your ever married, you'll be forgiven. Your forgiven for everything, as long as you know it was wrong and you want to be forgiven and such. To tell you the truth I don't really think having sex with the person your engaged with is really wrong. Perhaps it is? I personally just don't think so. Maybe Its because I know a ton of people that have had sex before marriage, yet they were engaged. J'anelle says some good things as well. I agree with her in most cases.

I also think some christians take it a little to far. A lot of them I have seen even dis-own people because they had sex before marriage and its a huge sin..Kind of makes me think of how Christian react to people that have had an Abortion, although their two completely different things. Sex I don't think your going to end up killing someone in the process. I would atleast hope not.

Overall, I pretty much agree with what you said Melissa.

[sweetangel2128]

I see myself as being a Christian but not a religious Christian first of all so you know.

My views on sex before marriage is that just like you I believe sex should be shared between 2 people who love eachother because sex is a wonderful gift from God and he wouldn't want it any other way so if your in love and not just going out and doing iti just to do it I think in God's eyes it is okay however most Christians that I've spoken to thinks it's a sin anyway cause they say in the Bible sex before marriage is a sin and that if your going to have sex you should be married.

[sweetangel2128]

Sex before marriage (during engagement, with a partner, with a lover) is wrong. So basically, have sex with you spouse and thats it. Sure sex is a wonderful thing, and it's even more wonderful with one person only...

Where in the Bible, verse and area does it say that sex before marriage is wrong? I'd like you to point that one out to me. Sorry, I agree with Starlet on this debate...the whole idea of Marriage back then is totally different then today.

[me1issaaaa]

I don't see anything wrong with sex before marriage, I think every person should choose for themselves. If you want to wait until your wedding night, more power to ya. But when others think they have the right to preach on how wrong it is for anyone not to wait, I think that's crossing the line. It's a personal choice.

That being said, I was raised nondenominational, between Baptist and Methodist. Mmm... yeah.

[sweetangel2128]

I don't see anything wrong with sex before marriage, I think every person should choose for themselves. If you want to wait until your wedding night, more power to ya. But when others think they have the right to preach on how wrong it is for anyone not to wait, I think that's crossing the line. It's a personal choice.

That being said, I was raised nondenominational, between Baptist and Methodist. Mmm... yeah.

I agree with you 100% on that

[*IVIike*]

I don't see anything wrong with sex before marriage, I think every person should choose for themselves. If you want to wait until your wedding night, more power to ya. But when others think they have the right to preach on how wrong it is for anyone not to wait, I think that's crossing the line. It's a personal choice.

That being said, I was raised nondenominational, between Baptist and Methodist. Mmm... yeah.

i agree as well it's really up to the person what they want to do with their own body.

everyone has great points and i can see where you all are somming from