incest AND satiatory rape >>;, is this right? D: Options

[xmusic]

ok so this is the deal.

i have a friend of mine at school who's 16 and has a 22 year old cousin. Her cousin used to live in Texas but got kicked out by his mom, so he moved here to hawaii with my friend and her family.

she&&her cousin got really close and she told me that "i think he's cute and id f**k him if i had the chance" of course i didnt take this seriously considering it WAS her cousin and i thought she wouldnt be the type to well... ya know.

she never really had good relationships. and she was kind of a depressed kid (aka she'd cut herself and such). so when her cousin came into her life. she was alot happier. he "loves" her and she "loves" him.

so in september. they officially became a couple. i wasnt aware of this until later when i found out that they were having sex. she told me and a few other close friends about it and showed us a diary entry she wrote about it. it wasnt pretty "his beer belly pressed up against my thighs" D: they had sex 6 more times after that. (with no protection might i add)

i was concerned for her. since this was her cousin. and asked her about it. she said she didnt regret it and that they love each other. soon her mom found out and she kicked him out of the house. he moved in with a friend but they were still inseperable.

soon she told us about their plans on getting married and having children together. this concerned me since well. if they had kids. being first cousins and all. they'd come out deformed. we told her about it and she seemed really naive saying "i dont care. i want kids with him". this also concerned me because she seemed to be depressed again. in fact she cut herself yesterday because her mom burned her cousin's hat and they got into a large fight.

and at the same time i personally dont think her cousin is really that serious about their relationship. i was at a football game and he was with 2 other girls whom he seemed quite friendly with if you know what i mean.

i just really want to know if i should talk to her about this. or let her go. and if i do talk to her about it. what will i say? this is incest and satiatory rape and i just dont know what to do

[pandamonium]

aw your in a big dilemma right now, how have you been talking to her before? like when you talked to her about her cousin where you serious about it? or did you just put in your 2 cents here and there whenever she mentioned her cousin?

Well here is what I would do, i would really talk to her, like sit her down, and be like look this is how it is its not right that you're going out with your cousin and want to have kids with him. blah blah blah, if you do have kids they wouldn't be normal. just because blood + blood in the same family is bad. Just have a serious talk with her, if she doesn't listen, its still not your fault cause you did your best.

[NoSex]

Big brother approves of both incest and statutory rape.

[moorepocket]

statutory rape.

[x_curse_of_the_c...]

wow. that's pretty much disgusting. no offense. lol.

but anyways it's probebly just like any other relationship they will break up im almost certain. but what worries me is that she could become pregnant and then they would feel like they had to get married.

sorry i don't really have any advice. that's a toughie.

[littleswallow]

Oh wow, that's a really huge problem! I think your friend is being a bit too idealistic. I agree with what pandamonium said; sit her down and talk to her. I mean, she's your friend and she's bound to listen... I think.

[*xcaitlinx*]

just read the damn topic title...do you really need an explanation?

[tokyo-rose]

You should definitely talk to her about it. It's illegal on two counts what with the incest and statuatory rape, which makes it bad enough. But now you also say her cousin doesn't seem that committed to their relationship. If they break up, he will just move on and she will end up hurt. It's also kind of selfish for her to want kids with him because they would be born mentally retarded, and if he leaves her then she'll be a single teen mom with a handicapped child to care for.

[cheri_pi]

Your friend seems pretty desperate for some love in life- and she needs it so much she's in denial to the rape idea and deformed-kids idea and player idea.
I think you should talk to your school counselor about it.
I know, it seems really lame and the counselor won't help, but I promise he will. If I didn't visit a counselor I wouldn't be here today. They're really just wonderful people who want to help (and they HAVE to keep everything you tell them a complete secret unless you let them spill. It's illegal for them to not keep everything you say confidential. You can ask him if you don't believe me).
I think it would be a really good idea.

[Smoogrish]

Okay. You really really really need to sit down and talk to her. Convince her (beat it into her head!) that this is INCEST. She'd have deformed babies, and much as she says she doesn't care now, she'll really feel the pressure when she's having her cousin's babies. If her mother doesn't approve, where is she going to get help when she's pregnant? Even if she turns on you, just keep firm. Don't let her go through it.

[Spirited Away]

This is coming from someone who saw two good friends get thrown into the deep end from their relationships.

If you know that your friend will not change her mind no matter what anyone says nor can she be convince with the threats of deformed children, the best you can do is be there for her. You may disapprove of their relationship (who wouldn't be?), but as a friend, don't judge her badly. Sooner or later, she'll see what she's gotten herself into and she'll need someone to be there for her.

[xmusic]

thanks you guys. ahhhh its just hard. because u know. if she says she loves him. i dont want to like. get in between all of that. D: but i know i should do SOMETHING since its her cousin. i just want wats best for her and i just fijaodfjoasdjf D:

[lanbexx]

oh just let them be fuckups. at least theyre happy

[pandamonium]

oh just let them be fuckups. at least theyre happy

lol wow, thats a good idea.

[_sarcastic_]

remind her of all the consequences. if she refuses to listen then i guess the most you can just be there for her when she realizes she should've listened

[*sofakinglazy*]

Brenden is loose.

[smoke]

^ Lmao, Kevin, please. You know I'm not lol. Don't say such lies.

Yeah, I saw something on TV about this. A couple had to go through the same thing. :| I'd be really confused if I was in your situation. Even though I don't support what they're doing, I'd still be supportive. If that makes any sense. Just be there for her.

[*.fire*]

statutory rape.

Isn't legal age 16?

[xmusic]

Isn't legal age 16?

yeah but if the guy is 21 and older. its illegal unless ur 18.

[*WHIMSICAL 0NE*]

Age of consent varies depending on where you live. Here it's 18.

One thing about your post that sticks out to me is when you said that she was a lonely and depressed person. That makes me think maybe she's taking his love as all she can get. She's something to someone. I've heard many times before that that's how some pedophiles keep relationships with kids. Maybe that's why she's had some not-so-good relationships in the past and this seems to just be another.

I'm not really going to make any suggestions, seeing as I don't know anyone involved in this predicament. If it was me, though, I would talk to her about. Maybe let her know that it's her cousin, not just some guy. Even when the relationship ends she's still related to him. Find a way to make her feel of value to you and your friends and maybe it will open her eyes and she'll realize she doesn't need him to be important.

[rAwritsgWeg]

Isn't legal age 16?

I think its 18. It still doesnt make it right though.....The children won't come out right. And why is she cutting? She is brining these problems to herself. Being a past cutter(a big one I might add) Its for something she shouldnt be cutting for. However, I'm just a 16yr kid sittin at his comp at 1:51am, so I cant really do much other than saying this. Let her do what she wants, just ask her if she truly and completely understand the consequences. Only then will she be sure

[imm]

Big brother approves of both incest and statutory rape.

True dat. BTW I think 18 is the age of consent in most, if not all, of the United States.

[magicfann]

i will napalm your whole family if this continues

this is absolutely unacceptable young lady

[*mipadi*]

True dat. BTW I think 18 is the age of consent in most, if not all, of the United States.

Depends on the state. In the state in question (Hawaii), 16 is the age of consent, according to here.

Not that I'd argue this situation is "okay".

[*.fire*]

You all read my reply wrong, I wasnt condoning their actions I was just wondering out loud whether it was statutory rape or not and if it is then someone should contact the police as it is all rather illegal...