Confused.. Options

[misfit]

Ok yesterday my boyfriend said he was feeling insecure about me,worry that i'd leave him.And then he was mentioning marriage and then changed the subjct and I was just on the phone to him before and I said I wanna see you and he goes why and isaid coz I miss you and he goes why and I said coz I love you and he goes why?And I said why do you want to know?And he goes I just do.And I told him why I love him and he said but I lecture you(what we were fighting about earlier on) and barely ever come to your house.I was like are you trying to break up with me?And he goes no then laughed and said you're an idiot.I thought about it more and I went all quiet then hung up...
Have I taken him the wrong way?I'm so confused.


-EDIT-
I just spoke to him then and he said as if i'd break up with you i love you,I was just curious but I didn't see it that way...How would you take it if you were me?

[magicfann]

1) he's messing around
2) he likes another girl
3) he's a bit slow in the head
4) he's trying to show he's sensitive and philosophical and is a great thinker
5) he's thinking about jack bauer

[lyin_in_wait]

either hes playing some serious mind games on some grimy level, or hes just insecure and loves you more than you know....he cant help being insecure but he could stop the mind games.

[SarahxJoy]

How he said all of that, that wasn't cool. I suggest for you to talk to your boyfriend about how confused he made you and that the way he handled things wasn't acceptable. You should let him know that such confusing messages could get your signs crossed and something bad could happen in the relationship that would eventually lead to a breakup. If he doesn't want that, then he should stop.

[bballchick1]

Wow, he's seriously messing with you.

He's definitely playing mind games..for what reason, I have no clue.

[misfit]

1) he's messing around
2) he likes another girl
3) he's a bit slow in the head
4) he's trying to show he's sensitive and philosophical and is a great thinker
5) he's thinking about jack bauer

Wtf?
I don't think he's playing mind games.I think he was talking about marriage because he's scared of losing me.he said he felt strange yesterday,he felt insecure because he all the sudden felt like I was going to leave him. I dunno why he felt it, he said he didn't know why. I said maybe it's because when he's first ever girlfriend that he was with,he loved and she left him and he was an absolute wreck,I spoke to his sister about it.And he's just scared of loosing me too.I think he felt that insecure that he was talking about marriage.He tells me he loves me every day,he messages me or calls me every day.He said to me the other day he really really really misses me and wishes he saw me every day.I mean i'm sure people going through a stage of feeling insecure about their partner?And he doesn't want me going out to clubs with just my friends either...

We've been going out for 6 months.
And he did mention in a message,that he wanted to know bad things about him, because maybe there is things he can change.They were his words...I dunno maybe he rreally does love me and just wanted to know,or that he's just feleing really insecure and thats why he wants to see,so he can try better not to do those things?

[LiSFORLiNDA]

Umm..it looks like you know what you were confused about ^^

[misfit]

,I was asking for opinions,but hm yeah I suppose I do understand now. I just don't see why everyone thinks he's playing mind games,not every guy is like that.

[PrincessAda]

If I were you,I would be sort of mad..I wouldn`t break up with him though.

[*baby_in_blue*]

If I were you,I would be sort of mad..I wouldn`t break up with him though.

touche.

[misfit]

Why so you all think he's been unfaithful?None of you know my relationship or him,I was asking for opinions.I dont see why none of you think that maybehe was just curious of what he could improve on?

[misoshiru]

Okay, to be honest, I didn't really understand any of that. And see, you were asking for opinions, and those answers or posts from all the members is their impression from your original post.

[lyin_in_wait]

Every guy plays mind games, whether its intentional or not. This, i guess, is his way of showing that he really cares and hes scared of losing you. Mind games arent always obvious, but everybody is guilty of it at some point.

[lanbexx]

its simple. he loves you, he's jealous of other guys, hes got a tad bit of an inferiority complex, not great self esteem, and is too masculine to admit that he doesnt want to lose u. this is his way. so dont cheat on him cause he sounds hella cool, or else the pinky demon will come get u

[LiSFORLiNDA]

I think he's just worried that you might just leave him like his ex did. I kept thinking that with my ex bf. I kept thinking he's the one for me but what if he finds someone better is he gonna just forget everything we had & just leave me. He cares so much about you...he's just scared...asking you about marriage, i think he really cares about you dont let him go. Hehe i think thats really sweet; the marriage thing that must mean he dreams & pictures ya'll two together getting married right now im saying "AWW" haha im such a dork. Well anyways i dont think there's anything to be confused about, hope everything goes well :)

[misfit]

Thanx,you're really sweet =)...And yeah girls I know I wanted your opinions, what I meant was a lot of you are saying he's playing mind games,but you didn't explain what made you think it's that...I mean by mind games what do you mean by that..

[anoniez]

lol he's just being insecure, my boyfriend does taht sometimes.. you know like criticizing themselves to make you reassure them. aww haha like stfulinda said, hes just scared of losing you =) its sweet.

[misfit]

now i feel like smsing him and getting angry at him,coz some of you have put thoughts into my head and made me feel insecure and worry so I started reading his message history and a girl sent him a pic and he goes oo 3 hot girls and then he was like brb mwa and he was saying something like sharpening his fork whatever that means...
Grr i dunno if im over reacting now but argh

[cassjamminx]

^ try not to sweat it out so much.

i know some evidence you might find is going to rattle your mind. but try not to put the puzzle together on your own will always mislead you and have you thinking the wrong things.

i've had this happen to me sometimes, you find other evidence and you'll think the wrong thin g (not that saying that you are) but, if there are things in the back of your mind that you find kinda fishy, don't solve the puzzle on your own, ask him about it. if you tells you otherwise, and you still feel like he's lying or something, then ask yourself if you feel secure about him. if you feel like he's lying, then you obviously don't trust him.

the point is, just don't jump to conclusions, it'll hurt you in the end if your assumptions are right/wrong. either way.

[Paradox of Life]

1) he's messing around
2) he likes another girl
3) he's a bit slow in the head
4) he's trying to show he's sensitive and philosophical and is a great thinker
5) he's thinking about jack bauer

I think I'm leaning toward number 4 there. With the "why?" "why?" questioning stuff. I think he's just trying to get you to flatter him by telling him why he's so great to you.

Firstly, relax, girl! No one's trying to make you feel insecure, and there's on reason to jump to conclusions. It seems like you two aren't around each other enough. The only communication I hear of is through the phone or instant messaging. It's hard to talk to someone seriously without being able to look them in the eye.

And about the whole hot girl thing. He's a guy. Guys always do that stuff. And sometimes they do it just so they have a sense that you are competing with other girls for them.

Think small talk. Don't talk about commitment or anything beyond a couple of years in the future. And don't overanalyze everything. Just relax, talk to your boyfriend about the weather, sports, music, hobbies, etc.

[misfit]

I just don't stay at his house through the week coz his mum doesn't want me too,coz she wants to be abe to come home and relax,not that she can't do that I spose she just wants to come home not to a visitor..We see eachother every weekend though,without fail...I did end up staying lastnight though(thursday night),coz we made up something,saying that we were going somewhere and needed somewhere to stay after it,we didn't go or anything but yeah.. and i'm probably going to be staying til Sunday. I did message him(as in text message to his phone/sms) and he said firstly why are you look through my stuff,secondly the fork thing is a old joke her and I had.
We do see eachother enough...If we could, we'd move out together.

I know i've mentioned on the phon e or whatever,but the first time is coz I was at home and he was at his home and it was through the week when I can't stay.So therefore we were talking on msn and that's when he mentiopned stuff and then he called me.Then my other replies well,I ended up staying at his house lastnight and this issue has just come up today about me feeling all insecure and worried all over again and getting thoughts in my head and then checking his message history.He's at workj at the moment so I just text messaged to his phone.HE will be home soon though,we'll obviously talk about it but yeah...

I do over react sometimes...

I suppose his just insecure and wanted me to reassure him,that i'm not leaving him...thanks people...apart from the negative tuff that has made me worry and stuff..