looking for an answer.. Options

[xforgottenlove]

aww that's so sadd *tear* haha kk sorry i get a bit dramatic sometimes XD mm but either way, i hate it when i see these really nice guys who every girl can only dream of being with hurt by girls who really don't deserve them at all. well my advice is that even though you love her, you shouldn't take her back. i mean i don't wanna be harsh but she obviously doesn't feel the same for you or else she would've never done this. soo yah wellps hope everything turns out alright... hopefully.

[BryMonster]

You did nothing wrong. If anything, you
were being the sweetest boyfriend possible.
Sometimes girls think to themselves ,"He's
too good for me." I know this, because I've
been given that as a lame excuse. Probably
that's why girls cheat. Was there any sign
the entire time, that she was giving you a
bad vibe or something?

[*Uronacid*]

also, she could have just been an abusive bitch... :)

[chasingvictory]

oh man, I'm sorry dude. I feel your pain. You just have to let time heal your pain.. and what did you do wrong? well there can be many reasons why. So there are two options, talk to her or give some space. keep yourself busy.

[nikkkkki]

maybe there was too much..clinginess? sometimes a person could cheat on someone they really care about to..I dennno. but it's goes along the lines of something like that. you know how people just don't like too much closeness, maybe she was scared and felt like she had to flirt around and see if there was anyone else who could compare to you. but things just got out of hand? I don't see any other reason why she'd do that other than that.

and consider,
there are times when girls could just be plain, horny, backstabbing men. including me.

[Terror]

thanks to everyone, really.
and just so you know...she came back.
she wants me to call her again and talk to her.
because she "loves me and misses me so much and is so sorry blah blah blah bullshit."

You did nothing wrong. If anything, you
were being the sweetest boyfriend possible.
Sometimes girls think to themselves ,"He's
too good for me." I know this, because I've
been given that as a lame excuse. Probably
that's why girls cheat. Was there any sign
the entire time, that she was giving you a
bad vibe or something?

no, i mean...I thought we would actually be together...forever.
she made me feel like, like...I dont know, the happiest person ever. and I could tell i made her happy too.
I dont know what went wrong.

maybe there was too much..clinginess? sometimes a person could cheat on someone they really care about to..I dennno. but it's goes along the lines of something like that. you know how people just don't like too much closeness, maybe she was scared and felt like she had to flirt around and see if there was anyone else who could compare to you. but things just got out of hand? I don't see any other reason why she'd do that other than that.

and consider,
there are times when girls could just be plain, horny, backstabbing men. including me.

thats possible...but I'll say it again, she. cheated. on. me. over. four. times.
I really dont think that applies here.
and it was serious cheating, as in sex.

[Your pain is not...]

Don't take her back. I want to break her face.

[Terror]

im really trying not to.
but her acting like this, is pulling alot of emotions out of me that I've tried so damn hard to bury.
=[

[priyas]

^^Maybe she felt you were too possesive.
Anyways, as Chii said we only know your side of the story. Of course, you won't depict yourself as a bad guy.

Maybe she had sex just cuz she wanted to experience it, and she still loves you.

[Terror]

"Maybe she had sex just cuz she wanted to experience it, and she still loves you."

uh...I HOPE you dont think thats a reasonable excuse.

[KissMe2408]

Wow.

First of all, I read through this entire topic and noticed that she came back and is "so sorry" and all. I wouldn't go back to her, how could you trust her? No, if I was cheated on 4 + times and the guy wanted to come back, there is now way i would take him back. Because even when it seemed like you guys were so happy and all, and you were in love, she still was cheating on you! I mean c'mon, you can't trust someone like that.
2nd, You didn't do anything wrong, okay? You sounded like you were faithful, loving, and always there for her. A wee bit obsessive in a way, but hey, it happens. This girl isn't worth it, You should save your heart, time, emotions for a girl that is worth it, and I know there is a girl out there that is worth it. You don't need to deal with all this drama, heartache, and tears. And what's worse is now she is trying to come back and pull you every which way, and it's just too much.
I say be by yourself for some time. Focus on being happy with yourself, and when the right girl comes along you will know. You are pretty young, you've got your whole life. Just give this time.
I'm really sorry about what this girl did to you, i promise not all girls are like that.

[Terror]

I dont think I was obsessive, she did alot of the same stuff for me.
And I just really really wanted her to feel loved and all that stuff that every girl needs.
But hey, maybe I did take it a bit too far.
and thanks.
yeah..she's trying to get my friend to convince me to call her. and its like, giving me a humongous headache.
cause Ive been trying really hard to convince myself shes not worth it, but all that is reversed when I hear she wants to get back.
Most of me is like, f**k that bitch, but theres still a piece of me that misses all those late night talks and kisses on the cheek. and love. god i miss that.
im torn.

[msladyliberty]

Before I give an opinion, I absolutely don't know you personally, and I don't know "her" in the same matter. Sooo...since you openly asked for an opinion, I hoep you don't mind if I gave you mine.

From what I've read, I genuinely think you love this girl. So from your side of the story, you seem like you've been a really nice guy.

Obviously, it looks like she hasn't taken the relationship as seriously as you have...since the beginning. After all, you found out that you're not her "one and only." So it appears that she doesn't care about you as much as you cared about her.

I can honestly say that I've dated other people "on the side," even if I had a boyfriend. Reason being...is because I sort of wanted to know what it's like to have a boyfriend. Secondly, I didn't even know how restricted or how serious I had to be to actually have a boyfriend.

Basically, I was being selfish and didn't think about the other person's feelings.

My point...I don't think you didn't do anything wrong...I just think that you two weren't seeing eye to eye in the relationship.

Sure it sux! But that's the real world!! Now if she wants you back...you'd have to consider if she'd be serious this time!

[Terror]

well if its true I was her "boyfriend on the side", then that is still comletely screwed up.
She led me on so damn much, she had me believing she wanted to marry me and have my kids, thats the only reason I ever went that far with her, because I truly believed she loved me just as I loved her.
And If she didn't love me as much as I did, then why the f**k would she continue to stay with me and toy with my emotions.

And right now im going f**king insane, she wont stop sending all these old damn pictures of me and her together and all these little love notes.
But i promised myself, I.Wont.Take.Her.Back.
I am so f**king weak when It comes to her...god.
I have NEVER opened up completely to someone like I did to her, I told this girl everything about me, I told her stuff I'd never said to ANYONE.
Sheesh.
I'm not doing that again.
And I HOPE you guys are right, I really hope that there are still girls who know what honesty and loyalty and love is.

[*mipadi*]

And right now im going f**king insane, she wont stop sending all these old damn pictures of me and her together and all these little love notes.

Have you told her how you feel, and that you don't want any sort of relationship with her anymore?

[msladyliberty]

well if its true I was her "boyfriend on the side", then that is still comletely screwed up.
She led me on so damn much, she had me believing she wanted to marry me and have my kids, thats the only reason I ever went that far with her, because I truly believed she loved me just as I loved her.
And If she didn't love me as much as I did, then why the f**k would she continue to stay with me and toy with my emotions.

I think you already know messed up she was to you.

But...I totally understand about "maybe...considering" to take her back...even if you said you won't. If it were me and my boyfriend, I'd definitely beg him to stop it and try to convince him that there is abosolutely "no one else" that could be better for him. The love I know now...is very forgiving.

Before I knew a love like ours, I would've just flipped off the cheater right away.

Can't say that our love is similiar to yours, or if you even know this kind of love...

but it sounds like you don't know what you want.

I'D CHOOSE HAPPINESS...and eff the rest.

She seems like she's trying very hard to convince you that she truly cares for you. If she didn't...then I don't think she'll make the effort at all.

It's totally up to you.

But if you truly loved this girl like you said you did...then I don't think you'd be on here seeking for some help.

[Terror]

I dont think your understanding this...
shes not taking me back because she "loves me", shes taking me back because she just misses the feeling of talking to me and all of that.
and shes using "i love yous" as a way to try and make me talk to her again.
I found out, the only reason she was with me, is because she needed someone to constantly tell her and reassure her that she is beautiful and not ugly.

wonderful.

[PrincessAda]

Sad story..I don`t think you did anything wrong but love her.Ahh thats soo sad..makes me want to cry.

[Terror]

Yep.
I'm pretty much done with love and relationships.
f**k that.

[msladyliberty]

oh ok then!

Forget all the mushy stuff I said about taking her back and what not!

It sounds like she's not worth yer time if she's only with fer that reason.

take care

[Terror]

thanks to anyone who helped.

[blah1234567]

omg wow. im so sorry :(
there was absolutley nothing you did wrong. it was her descision to cheat on you and stuff and that is what she did. i guess think about it as her loss of losing you.

[xmoon_lightx]

that must have been really hard for you . But atleast now you learned something from it

[Terror]

thanks.
but it is kinda hard, knowing how broken up I am about this, but looking at her and seeing how normal she is going about her life...with her new boyfriend.

[JR Typer]

LOL fam aint nobody wanna date andy d**k stunt double nahmeen