A Message to Anyone, Version 20.0 |
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A Message to Anyone, Version 20.0 |
| *stephinika* |
Apr 15 2006, 01:17 AM
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#226
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Dear you,
God, I hate this. I hate being a pathetic loser who's paranoid and upset about all this. I care so much about you ... I really do. And I know you do love me and all but it bothers me so...I've cried too much today and I'm sick of it. I don't know what to do. How do I tell you? Should I? I'm sorry if I get on your nerves, god...I'm sorry for everything that I've done wrong or done to upset you or anything. I really am. All I want is to make you happy, honestly. I love you so damn much, and I try to show you as much as possible, I really do. I know I'm not perfect and that I make mistakes and I'm sorry but...I'm paranoid and stupid and a ninny. Its just...when we're on the phone sometimes...like tonight, you say the words and we talk but...I don't feel anything from you...not always. I miss that. It only happens some of the time, so I know you do but...why not all the time? And if you're upset...why won't you tell me? Maybe there is no reason and thats why you say nothing but...sometimes I get that feeling, that gut feeling that something is up and you always say 'nothing' and blah blah. Can't you at least tell me you're upset even if its over nothing? I feel like you can't or don't want to communicate with me...or maybe I'm just being over-analytical as always because you have said in the past you'll tell me when something is up. It's times like these when I hate myself. I'm so unbelievably scared of losing you, honestly, I am. I'm scared. That's all. And I'm sorry...I'm sorry I'm pathetic, and over-apologetic, and paranoid, and I don't know anymore. I worry about you thats why I question, but if it bothers you I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm annoying. I just want you to love me...and I know you do but...I just wish you'd show it more than just sometimes...I'm sorry if I'm being needy...godammit. I'm always sorry but I can't help it. I'm still surprised you like me even..I never thought you could. Yes, I'm severely insecure right now and I can't help it...you've told me so much and it's helped but I still am and I want to stop but I can't and just don't know how. And ... and ever since you got mad that one time I was spilling to you...I've been too scared to tell you anything, to spill my heart to you even though you've said its fine...but I'm scared I'll upset you somehow, I still am. And thats why this is on cB again instead of me telling you or emailing you or something as I had originally planned. I apologize for being a coward. |
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 01:44 AM
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#227
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Hopefully my mom doesn't come that early tomorrow. That was I have some time to see you!
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Apr 15 2006, 03:42 AM
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#228
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![]() in a matter of time ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 7,151 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 191,357 |
Salsa Boy,
omg. i'm hyperventilating. don't do this to me! |
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Apr 15 2006, 06:57 AM
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#229
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![]() Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,476 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 135,305 |
______,
i love you and miss you damn much!!!!!!i love you more than anythig this i promise you.....:) |
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Apr 15 2006, 07:40 AM
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#230
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![]() Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 226 Joined: May 2005 Member No: 144,979 |
i'm just so mad. i can't believe the questions you asked me. don't you understand how much you are opening old wounds? ughh. stupid jerk. now you got me thinking about it.
my emotions are so messed up right now. i just wish that i could get myself another chance to make it right but i know i'm not ready and i haven't found what i've been looking for yet. |
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 11:34 AM
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#231
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I miss you so much...when can you get here?
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| *mzkandi* |
Apr 15 2006, 04:36 PM
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#232
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Daddy, I love you. And I know you love me. For selfish reasons I want you to stay but I have to leave you in God's hands now. It's hurts, it hurts so much right now.
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 05:30 PM
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#233
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I wonder why you aren't answering. If you're doing something then tell me.
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Apr 15 2006, 06:05 PM
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#234
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![]() oooh yeah. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 1,333 Joined: Feb 2006 Member No: 376,533 |
Why the hell am I listening to Rascal Flatts? I hate country! Oh, thank goodness, it's done.
-------------------- ______, I added you on MySpace. I commented you, and you never replied back! D: Jackass. >:( ______, I hate you guys for always making me seem like the f**k-up in the family. I'm the liar, I'm the idiot who fails her classes, I'm the bad guy. Well, if you really think that way, why the hell haven't you put my sorry ass in foster care? I hate you all sometimes. |
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Apr 15 2006, 06:05 PM
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#235
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![]() banangst ♥ ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 727 Joined: Sep 2005 Member No: 237,399 |
___,
Oh please, get a life and stop crying over someone being late. Other people have lives to live by, and not according to you. Just shut the fcuk up and leave me alone. Boy, i thought you changed, and you have. Just not completely. You gotta learn to cooperate. ___, Why do you have to be such a bastard at times? Hypocrite. And now for the happy thoughts. ____, I need to spend quality time with you.<3 |
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| *Intoxique* |
Apr 15 2006, 06:43 PM
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#236
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____,
I miss you so much right now. Get online or call me. I miss you babe. ________, I act like I don't need you but I really do. I am breaking & I can't stand you being with her anymore. It kills me seeing you with her everyday. What happened to us? We were suppose to be together - forever. Or until this year ended. This year hasn't even began & you are already gone. |
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 07:20 PM
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#237
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___; I miss you bad.
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Apr 15 2006, 07:34 PM
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#238
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Leesaw :] ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 146 Joined: Dec 2004 Member No: 70,763 |
_ _ _ _.
I kind of don't know what to say. I just feel the need to write something, just anything. I still can't believe what happened. I don't think I've even begun to accept it. I've just been keeping it out of my mind. I guess I'm just trying to delay the realization for longer. I wish I could have gotten to know you better. It's too late for that now. I miss you so much and I don't even know you that well. I can't possibly imagine how the people who were closest to you feel right now. Everyone misses more than you can possibly imagine. Everyone also loves you a lot. Ah, whatever, my brain still isn't processing anything yet, so I don't think I should say anything more for now. Just know that I don't think you deserved this and I love you and miss you<3. |
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Apr 15 2006, 08:21 PM
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#239
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![]() cool by default. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 147 Joined: Apr 2006 Member No: 392,925 |
are you mad at me? are you avoiding me? i dont know. but it hurts.
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 08:55 PM
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#240
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I'm so sorry I didn't get a chance to talk to you at all today. I promise I'll make it up to you baby.
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Apr 15 2006, 09:42 PM
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#241
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![]() Being happy...is all that matters ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Member Posts: 765 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 102,284 |
Where are you...? I want to talk to you. You haven't answered the whole day, and I'm getting worried about you. Please, msg me back. Tell me that you're okie. Don't do this to me...you know how much I like talking to you. You know how I NEED to talk to you everyday to feel okie. Please. I'm gonna phone you in about 2 hours time if you don't msg me by then. Just talk...><
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| *mzkandi* |
Apr 15 2006, 10:28 PM
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#242
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_____ & _______ thanks for the phone calls.
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 11:09 PM
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#243
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I miss you so much, babe.
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Apr 15 2006, 11:27 PM
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#244
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![]() Bay Area YadadaDiiiig. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Group: Official Member Posts: 4,249 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 103,202 |
Im just always wondering why I cant have you. I know, but i dont. I understand but I cant. It just hurts to know that back then you were lying the whole time. Could you ? Did you even try. Was she really the reason. I just want to be able to think that all this time that i've been waitin for you you've been waitin on me too. But I know you havent been. Cos the other girl, is my girl. And we talk. And it hit me hard to know what i found out. You never even bothered to try did you. Cos you didn't care. You really didn't. You said you did and you lied and told me you did, that you wanted to be with me and that we would be and that you would call. But you never did. All you did was lie. But i still love you. And i feel pathetic and i hate myself for feeling that way. I hate having my own little pity party and crying over you the way I do. And i know i got to get over you and just move on and try keep on keepin' on but its hard cos your all i can think of. I hate lookin' at pictures of you and think of what we could of had cos its stupid and pathetic. And i hate myself and i hate you but i love you at the same time. I dont even know why i feel this way anymore. Im just lost in it all.
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 15 2006, 11:38 PM
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#245
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Aww, thats so sweet. I didn't know you would actually wait for me.
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 16 2006, 01:10 AM
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#246
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___; I can't believe I'm getting jealous over a guy.
Him: asdlkasjdaskljdas Him: THATS NOT WHAT I SAIDDD Him: <_< x tainted S0UL: sure it is Him: im like Him: ready to x tainted S0UL: i have proof. Him: put him as first x tainted S0UL: lol Him: on my top 8 x tainted S0UL: go ahead Him: nahh x tainted S0UL: lol Him: you would be super pissed x tainted S0UL: yeah pretty much Him: pms status x tainted S0UL: its like if i replaced you with jue or something Him: noooo way Him: jue isnt as coolio as ernesto Him: XD x tainted S0UL: lol x tainted S0UL: well im not cool at all x tainted S0UL: live with it! x tainted S0UL: >=D Him: yes you are Him: your very cool SwE3t bEtrAyAL: my very cool, extremely pretty, easy to talk to, outgoing girlfriend SwE3t bEtrAyAL: *wipes sweat* x tainted S0UL: lol x tainted S0UL: =] x tainted S0UL: my dorkface sweet and uber easy going boyfriend x tainted S0UL: I see how it is! x tainted S0UL: u________u x tainted S0UL: you're not paying attention to me! SwE3t bEtrAyAL: ...? SwE3t bEtrAyAL: yes i am? x tainted S0UL: lol SwE3t bEtrAyAL: this guy is so f**king creepy SwE3t bEtrAyAL: asdklasd SwE3t bEtrAyAL: its like me! SwE3t bEtrAyAL: but shorter SwE3t bEtrAyAL: tanner SwE3t bEtrAyAL: and like SwE3t bEtrAyAL: smaller shirts! x tainted S0UL: lol x tainted S0UL: i need a drink SwE3t bEtrAyAL wants to directly connect. SwE3t bEtrAyAL is now directly connected. x tainted S0UL: be right back SwE3t bEtrAyAL: LOOK x tainted S0UL: kay SwE3t bEtrAyAL: pay attention to the seconds SwE3t bEtrAyAL: leE r N e s T o (2:06:20 AM): Omg omg what else SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:22 AM): this is making me like SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:22 AM): wanna SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:26 AM): take all movies SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:30 AM): and play them SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:32 AM): 1 by one leE r N e s T o (2:06:35 AM): XD leE r N e s T o (2:06:43 AM): Yeah I know SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:49 AM): like power rangers leE r N e s T o (2:06:49 AM): I wanna see the power rangers movie SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:51 AM): imma watch that sh*t SwE3t bEtrAyAL (2:06:51 AM): LOL x tainted S0UL: sounds fun x tainted S0UL: much faster than ours x tainted S0UL: >< SwE3t bEtrAyAL: SwE3t bEtrAyAL: x tainted S0UL: be right back hun SwE3t bEtrAyAL: k SwE3t bEtrAyAL direct connection is closed. What is wrong with me? |
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| *Intoxique* |
Apr 16 2006, 01:25 AM
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#247
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Guest |
____,
I need to stop flirting with you & make up my mind. |
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| *stephinika* |
Apr 16 2006, 01:33 AM
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#248
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Guest |
Hey.
Today was nice. I had fun...even though I had that cry session. I'm glad you noticed finally and I'm glad we talked...it hurt, but in the end we both felt better and I hope things stay like this for awhile. Happy 9 months darling, I love you. |
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Apr 16 2006, 01:51 AM
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#249
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I can't believe your chats with him are 2 seconds apart. Literally. While mine and yours are more like 5 minutes apart. Can't you ever stop talking about him? It's all you ever talk about.
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| *Intoxique* |
Apr 16 2006, 02:05 AM
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#250
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____,
Okay, we both need to stop flirting with each other & make up our mind. You told me that you liked me then 2 seconds later you told me that you don't like me. Damnit, make up your f**king mind. I need to know & he needs to know too. ________, ____ & _____, Should I believe him or should I break his heart before he breaks my? ________, Omgoshhh, grad shopping. Sweety I can't wait, leaving this f**king school, f**k those teachers, screw those problem sheets. We are out of here in 3 months |
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