Are you one of those girls?, Because I am.. Options

[sarahjung]

You know those girls around school who are always only with guys? I think I'm one of those girls. The problem is, I don't even want a boyfriend until I'm a sophomore in college. (I'm a junior in high school right now), yet people always think that I'm friends with guys only to get with them. The real reason I have so many more guys friends than girls is because of the issues that I've had with my girl friends before.

Okay, so I've never really been able to connect with girls. I don't do a lot of "girly" things, like gossiping, having lots of boyfriends, and putting on makeup. I'm not a tomboy or anything. I just never really got into those kinds of things. The girls see me with my guy friends and automatically assume that I'm a flirt and my only goal is to get with guys, which is totally not the case. In fact, I'd rather have girl friends than guys. I feel left out and wish that I was more girly (ahaha) at times, but I can't make myself into someone that I'm not.

When I try to make friends with girls (who are almost all girly at my school), I become this horrible conversationalist with no social skills. The conversations are awkward and boring. It totally sucks, and people always get the wrong impression of me.

Soo...my quesion is: Do any of you have these problems? I know I'm not the only one. If you do, what do you do about it to change other people's assumptions about you?

[mylittleMiracle]

oh my situation is just opposite to yours.

i can just connect with girls but i cant connect with boys.(btw im not girly)
well perhaps because my school is a unisex school.



dont need to think other people's view,just do it on
but if i were you,i maybe....talked to girls more.idols,homework teachers bleh bleh bleh.....
horrible conversation with no social skills?how?

[GREASEbaby]

Yea, I'm one of those girls too. During 6th grade, I got turned off by all of my girl friends because they are too dramatic and were just always bringing me down. I would go on and on, but basically what's happening is the same exact thing to me, but (no offense intended) I think I'm able to cope a little more.

When I hang out with the very few of my girl friends, I basically act like the way I do towards the guys - friendly, funny, and playful, and my friends love it, which is how I keep those friends. Just be yourself, and eventually you'll gain those *social skills*, it's not that hard, really.

[HelloSunshine]

Hmm, well. It must be hard in your situation. I talk to boths guys and girls. Sometimes guys are just easier to talk to because they's more easy going and they won't really make a big deal out of something. If the girls won't except you, then maybe they're just not worth being your friends. Maybe you can find a girl who has the same interests as you by joining some clubs or something, but when you do try and talk to other girls, just be yourself. If they're going to be your friend then they should accept you for who you are.

[*Intoxique*]

I am a little bit of both. I got as many guy friends as girl friends. Like my girl friend's boyfriend is also usually my friend so it all works out. I guess thats because I am really social with everyone .
You could always try to make friends with your guy friend's girl friend. Get social with someone you usually won't talk to. Join a club or sport group like someone above suggested. Or make friends with your girl friend's other friends .

[DemoiceDevil]

I feel it`s easier to talk to boy`s then I do girl`s but not to get with them.. The girl`s in my school scream "OH MY GOD I BROKE MY NAIL!" and no guy in my school like`s the girl`s and I myself am scared of them

[cloudprincess92]

like people said above, join a club or soemthing of that sort to meet new people. Scout out for more people like yourself
But if all else fails....

(sorry i over use the quote way to much but it can work with alot of things, and its one of my favorite quotes of all time)

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.” - Dr. Suess

[sarahjung]

I am a little bit of both. I got as many guy friends as girl friends. Like my girl friend's boyfriend is also usually my friend so it all works out. I guess thats because I am really social with everyone .
You could always try to make friends with your guy friend's girl friend. Get social with someone you usually won't talk to. Join a club or sport group like someone above suggested. Or make friends with your girl friend's other friends .

Well, all the couples in my "group" at school are the PDA type. They have no time for anyone but each other and they're usually making out, so I don't and can't really talk to either of them.

Yeah, the reason I make more guy friends than girl friends is because they accept me the way I am. Most girls analyze you and gossip about you, and I don't like that shi*t.

Don't get me wrong, I have girl friends, but I'm always hanging out with the guys, because they're the only ones that actually want to hang out. My girl friends just chill with me in my classes or maybe some lunches, but never after school or during the weekend. Godd, now I know why guys complain that girls are complicated.

Thanks, you guys, for understanding. =]

[_sarcastic_]

i'm kind of in that situation, but i can still get along with my girl friends.
yeah i too am always hanging out with the guys, i seem to get along with them easier than i do with girls because most of my girl friends can't stand getting rough and playing sports whereas i love playing sports.
don't get too worried over what the other girls say, they're probably jealous too that you can get the guys to hang out with you and they can't

[aznxdreamer]

i cant really connect with guys. i only have a few close guy friends and i lose all the new guy friends i make in a matter of months. not because we get into fights or anything, we just dont talk anymore. im really awkward around guys that i think have higher social status than me.

[Chii]

I love boys. I get along with them much better. I don't do well with girls because they always tend to take a dislike to me. I've always done well with boys, I'm the girl who always has a boyfriend or some boy in my life. When I was in high school, the girls hated me because this popular guy that they all liked, liked me. I had a boyfriend, yet they still talked trash and hated on me.

I don't do the whole make up thing because I like being natural, what you see is what you get. I want people to like me for me, not who I appear to be. I don't try to make people like me.

When the girls were two faced to me, I didn't care because I knew they were two faced. I kept the relationship very casual and sometimes, I'd just ignore them when they called me in the halls. If people don't take the time to know me and just hate me for petty reasons then they can, I'm not going to go out of my way to change their opinion of me.

Don't let it bother you, they're just jealous.

[teeners4]

i used to be like that. and well now i still am but it depends. like sometimes i hang strictly with guys and sometimes i hang out strictly with girls and sometimes its a mix. i don't know like i'm sure how you say you're not totally girly or a totally a tomboy...you still have sides of you that are more boyish and sides of you that are more girlish. so just put that into play when you talk to people. and don't be awkward and a shy conversationalist, i know how that feels like. like just talk how you normally would even if you're scared they might find it stupid. who cares?! just say it! =D you never know, maybe they'll find it funny and if they don't you can always rebound back ^^ and if they judge you because of that ONE lame line you said...then it's like major wtf and they're probably not worth it anyways.


okay that was really long, but what i'm trying to get at is that don't let it bother you! just be your ol' silly self

[ecargnmyst]

OMG I HAVE THE SAME EXACT PROBLEM AS YOU!!!!! and i was gonna make a post about it..haha

same exact thing..i cant really get along with girly girls..its not like i fight with them..its just b/c they giggle so much..and i cant relate to anything they talk about b/c all they talk about are shopping and guys..and its sucks for me b/c in chorus im a 2nd soprano and all the other sopranos r girly girls..so im stuck with them and feel so left out

most of my friends in fact almost all..are guys..and it is not to get with them..but ppl dont think of me as one to get with guys b/c i dont look like those slutty flirty fawning types...its just that..i can talk to guys more easily i guess..i have wayy more fun with them..and theres none of that backstabbing thing ..guys r just more friendly and accepting of me..heh

but..yeah...sometimes i do wish i was one of the girls b/c i am a girl and it would be easier for me..since like..some of the guys i hang out with..do try to take advantage of me when theyre drunk ..and that is something that doesnt happen when u have girl friends.. and itd also be easier for sleepovers with girl friends..b/c i have sleepovers at my guy friends house..but its hard to explain that to my parents..and when my friends call me up..my moms like..why are guys calling u up =\

and now its sr yr and there are times i kinda regret not having any close girl friends..but my experiences with girl friends havent been that great.. b/c they spread rumours about me and were really two-faced..so yeah ..

im glad im not the only girl with mostly guy friends =] but dont care about what other ppl think..no one can force u to become friends with girls..its up to you..lol.. haha sometimes i wish i was a guy b/c of the.."oh ur a girl and ur friends are all guys you flirt"

[flc]

Do any of you have these problems? I know I'm not the only one. If you do, what do you do about it to change other people's assumptions about you?

I don't see it as a problem..I love my guy friends, they're fun to be with and just share the same kind of humor as me. I guess I am one of those girls.

My mom always gives me a hard time about going out, because unless I'm with a girl or just my boyfriend, she doesn't want me hanging out with a group of guys {Or just a single guy, for that matter.} unless another chick is there. But it's SO HARD for me to find a girl to hang with. I only have like, three girls that I'm on a hang-out basis with.

[Paradox of Life]

I don't see it as a problem..I love my guy friends, they're fun to be with and just share the same kind of humor as me. I guess I am one of those girls.

Same situation here. I had a party with about 5 other guys and I was the only girl. Everyone was so wild, but I fit right in. It was a blast. I don't see it as a problem. If you hang around boys and they accept that you're a girl, doesn't that make you feel special? Why do you see it as a problem?

[*Blow_Don't_SUCK*]

I have a problem with talking to girls too, thus my guy friends. But I do have a lot of girl friends now. Mostly because in science my teacher placed me in a table full of girls, and if I am obligated to get to know them, I get along with them and soon enough we become close friends.

[sarahjung]

The reason I think of it as a problem is because I hate when people think wrongly of me. It makes me go out of my mind and I think about it constantly. Plus, of course I want girl friends. They have good times that only girls can have and I'm secretly jealous of that. Sometimes I wish I could have the sleepovers/makeovers/and boy gossip and I used to have with girls when I was younger.

Guy friends are a lot of fun, I'll admit that, but girl friends are a lot of fun too. I wish I could be one of those girls who are versatile and can be equally good friends with both sides.

Oh, I don't think I mentioned this but I just transferred into my new (public) high school from my old (private) one this school year. The first people to befriend me were guys and so I, of course, stuck with them. Later on in the year, when I tried to break out my "guys-only" shell and tried to make friends with girls, they didn't really accept me because they already saw me as a flirt, which I don't blame them for doing.

[Cykia]

I can relate to that. Sort of.

I know what you mean: you've got friends who are girls, too, but when it comes to hanging out, IMing and things like that, it's normally the guys who are there to listen, to hang out and things like that.

... Right?

'Cause I have a friend who's a guy who is always there when I need him. We joke and stuff, walk to classes etc. together at school because most of our classes are the same (and because we're good friends anyway), and everyone thinks that we're flirting and stuff, which is why some of the girls don't even act like they know me around school.

I don't have a problem like yours exactly, but I do know what it's like to have everyone going "OMGZ0RZ CHRS && BIANCA LAWL" and misunderstanding...

=[ It's hard, I know...

[AngelinaTaylor]

I'm in this exact situation. I've always had more guy friends than girl friends. In my country, we were a whole "gang" and I was the only girl.. haha. Other than that, I had two girl friends and that was it.

Here - same thing. I hang out with guys because they're simply more fun to hang out with than girls. I'm seriously sick of girls. All they seem to talk about is guys, make-up and clothes. With guys, I actually get to have a decent conversation. My mom is always like "Why can't you be friends with girls! What's wrong with you?!" But I do have one close female friend and a few girls that I sometimes hang out with.

I'm not a tomboy or anything (like you said) - I do put make up on, I do have a purse and I do dress like a girl, but I'm not girly.. I hate shopping/gossiping/talking like this: "AND OMG, she like TOTALLY like copied me, and like he was like SOOOO HOT!!"/etc.

And I don't really care what other people think about me.. I have a boyfriend, and I'm not hanging out with guys to "get more". I don't even know what people think, honestly.

Taylor``

[myPESTICIDE]

You don't need to change yourself at all! If you want to hang arond with girls, then hang around with them! Invite them over your house, talk to them online, etc. If you want to do more girly things, here are some ideas:

-You don't need to give yourself a complete makeover, but you could wear a little mascara and lipgloss.

-Wear flattering clothes, unless you already do. I mean like tight jeans, tops that show off your body, and accessorize. Go for pinks and purples.

-Give yourself blonde highlights (I can see from your picture that your hair is dark) to lighten up your look. You can actually buy hair dye for $3.00 at any pharmacy. And if you can't do your own hair, get someone else to, like an older sister, mom or friend.

Hope I've helped. Good luck!:smile:

[lorrytruck;]

Puahaha.
im the same i guess.
i feel more comfortable with the guys...

[Jayembe]

yea im sorta like you but then two of my best frends are girls and the rest are mostly guys cus i love guys ther so easy but sumtimes they dont care enough if you no what i mean

[sarahjung]

I'm in this exact situation. I've always had more guy friends than girl friends. In my country, we were a whole "gang" and I was the only girl.. haha. Other than that, I had two girl friends and that was it.

Here - same thing. I hang out with guys because they're simply more fun to hang out with than girls. I'm seriously sick of girls. All they seem to talk about is guys, make-up and clothes. With guys, I actually get to have a decent conversation. My mom is always like "Why can't you be friends with girls! What's wrong with you?!" But I do have one close female friend and a few girls that I sometimes hang out with.

I'm not a tomboy or anything (like you said) - I do put make up on, I do have a purse and I do dress like a girl, but I'm not girly.. I hate shopping/gossiping/talking like this: "AND OMG, she like TOTALLY like copied me, and like he was like SOOOO HOT!!"/etc.

And I don't really care what other people think about me.. I have a boyfriend, and I'm not hanging out with guys to "get more". I don't even know what people think, honestly.

Taylor``

That's exactly how I feel! Thank God I'm not the only one. Hahaha. Sometimes I feel like something's wrong with me because it feels like girls avoid me. I do put on a little makeup and put only girly clothes. I don't think that's the problem at all. What really bugs me is that my parents and especially my sister are always getting on my case for not having enough girl friends. Whenever they ask me, "Why don't you hang out with your girl friends?" I have no answer for them. I don't know why girls don't seem to like me or if I've done anything wrong. You know what I'm saying, right?

[Animeloverhk93]

That's exactly how I feel! Thank God I'm not the only one. Hahaha. Sometimes I feel like something's wrong with me because it feels like girls avoid me. I do put on a little makeup and put only girly clothes. I don't think that's the problem at all. What really bugs me is that my parents and especially my sister are always getting on my case for not having enough girl friends. Whenever they ask me, "Why don't you hang out with your girl friends?" I have no answer for them. I don't know why girls don't seem to like me or if I've done anything wrong. You know what I'm saying, right?

omg thats how i feel too!! what a coincidence (sp) i'm not a tomboy i do like girl things but when it comes to my friends saying why you sitting at the guy table>? i'd e like "uhh uhhhhhh because--- " lol

good thing i'm not hte only one too!

[kpgrl4eva]

same. at school i hang out with all guys, and one other girl, so basically in my group of friends it's like...10 guys and 2 girls. since i was little i preferred hanging out with guys. less drama. but my best friends have always been girls, so yeah. i'm not girly girl either. i still enjoy shopping and 'playing' with make up, but i'm not one of those girls that wear 5 pounds of make up to school everyday. i dress casually, jeans, tshirt, sweatshirt, like regular clothes. i do love hollister. but yeah. i love sports and i dont cry over a broken nail...i dont think i've ever had one.