First boyfriend..., already making out! help! Options

[shadowchild]

Okay, I just got my very first boyfriend last night. And like 5 minutes after he asked me out we had our first kiss. It was the first time for both of us. Then a few hours later we started making out. Now, we both liked it at the time, but now we are both thinkign that we went too far. We weren't even going out for a day. Now we both agreed to slow up and wait, but how can I hold myself back?

Sorry if I sound like a baby about this, but I'm afraid of going even further when we've only been going out for a day.

[eternalwonder143]

Wow, that sounds like you guys are taking thinga a little fast, which could result in a bit of awkardness. If you guys have known eachother for a while without dating as friends or something, though that's different. Sorry if I wasn't really of any help.

[shadowchild]

Well, we've known eachother for over 6 months, and we've been best friends for a loooonnnnggg time. We have been holding hands for the past few weeks, but he just decided to ask me out. Now this is happening. Yes, we have both agreed to slow down, but it is a bit easier said than done.

Sorry, I should've made that more clear earlier.

[eunie03]

Aw... At least your first kiss was a good one. Can I ask how old you are, though?

[shadowchild]

I'll be 15 on the 20th. So yeah, I'm old enough for my first kiss. I just didn't think it'd be after only one day.

[*Blow_Don't_SUCK*]

Wait a minute, what's so bad about already making out? Isn't that just prooving you guys really like each other?

[priyas]

^^i agree.

[shadowchild]

well yeah, but I don't know, I still feel like we're over doing it, and he agrees, but yeah, I really really do like him, and I guess it is a way to prove it. But I don't know, I'm sorta sheltered, and that could be some of the reason it makes me uncomfortable.

[*My Cinderella.*]

Wait a minute, what's so bad about already making out? Isn't that just prooving you guys really like each other?

^ I concur (sp?) what Yen said.

I don't think it really matters how fast you guys are going, just make sure that both of you are comfortable with it. But if you wanna slow down, I guess you could make the anxiety go down. Try to stay away from any empty rooms that you guys can be alone. Go out on double dates? But yeah...I guess stay away from empty rooms. It'll tempt you.

[shadowchild]

well actually... we were in a room with 3 other people in it yesterday when it happened. But we were hiding under a blanket... so I'm guessing, stay away from blankets too lol.

[TeeNage_WasTeLan...]

Did you get a little hot in your vagina? If so maybe you did take it too far.

[shadowchild]

woah, no....

[*My Cinderella.*]

Well I guess you should most likely just stay away from any source or thing that you two can hide in/under.

[shadowchild]

okay, that works... but we're going back to the place where it happened tonight. I just have to hold myself back. I think I can.

thanks for everyone's help. It justs makes it easier to talk to people and be comforted.

[Annabella Lee]

^ I concur (sp?) what Yen said.

I don't think it really matters how fast you guys are going, just make sure that both of you are comfortable with it. But if you wanna slow down, I guess you could make the anxiety go down. Try to stay away from any empty rooms that you guys can be alone. Go out on double dates? But yeah...I guess stay away from empty rooms. It'll tempt you.

I agree with my cinderella. Although it is tempting, try to resist. You should think about other things to make you not so anxious. Have you guys ever wrestled/tickled each other? That's what me and my ex used to do. We always had fun. I guess if you feel like kissing when you know you shouldn't tickle him. Who knows. It might work.

[Chii]

I might be a bit biased because I'm free with my feelings and actions when I'm attracted to somone. This guy used to be your best friend so you two are kind of starting out on your like 10th date or something. You began as good friends, you wouldn't take advantage of one another. It's not as bad as you think it is. Making out isn't a big deal, it's not like fondling was involved.

Just keep your hands to yourselves and remember that other people are there who don't want to see that.

I wonder if I'm helping of being a bad influence...

[*Blow_Don't_SUCK*]

well yeah, but I don't know, I still feel like we're over doing it, and he agrees, but yeah, I really really do like him, and I guess it is a way to prove it. But I don't know, I'm sorta sheltered, and that could be some of the reason it makes me uncomfortable.

what do you mean sheltered? Like you're not used to it? You'll get used to it. And please don't worry about over-doing things. Just worry about the interest of the other towards you.

[dorkk-ie]

HAHA HEYYYY
you're not alone!!
i was in the EXACT same situation as you..
it wasn't even 5 minutes i think.. asked, then kiss. LOL we've been best friends for 4 months or so.. but yeah.. if u dun feel comfortable with it, hold back. and don't give up everything for him especially if he's your first.
im glad i didn't go too far with this guy.

just please dont do anything you'll regret alright? even if you're caught in the moment :)

[Paradox of Life]

It's good that you realized you were going a bit fast. And I agree. If you do everything really fast, there will be nothing to anticipate! And if you make out once, you're bound to do it again and it could lead to even more, which would be a problem. Don't make a big deal out of it. Just make a mental note not to go overboard. Look at it as a one time deal until you feel comfortable doing it.

[Kounouri]

a lot of people are saying that making out isn't a big deal, especially at your age... but i can see where you're coming from when you say it is. my ex and i dated for ten months.. we made out a couple weeks in and for the rest of the relationship i didn't want to go very much further because my morals, well i don't believe in really fooling around. he got bored, and a little frustrated, and whenever i let myself do more i'd get really guilty.

the point is, if you both see it the same way then it won't be hard to hold back. you will both know when the moment is coming so you can simply distract yourselves. but, if he's saying he agrees when he really doesn't, then you have to worry about him pressuring you.

there's nothing wrong with feeling that way. just stick to your guns and don't force yourself to do something you don't want to do... LISTEN TO YOUR CONCSIENCE. Even if you feel like you want to do something, but a small part of your mind says not to, it's okay to listen to that small part.

in the end its up to you. there's nothing wrong with going with your feelings, and there's also nothing wrong with going with your mind. it's all written in your morals. if he's okay with it and you're okay with it, then just avoid opportunities to make out and stop yourself when you do.

and most of all, don't let him force you if he changes his mind.

[jennyjenny]

Well, it would be bad if you guys only met each other and then made out, but you guys've known each other for 6 months and it shows that you guys really like each other. You're not going to be pressured because he feels the same way. I don't really see anything wrong with it.

[silver-rain]

I dunno, with my boyfriend we started kissing after a couple of days... and we had just barely known each other for a month or so. And we're still together and really close.
But yea, like everyone said, if you feel it's too fast or rushed, then slow down. Don't let him pressure you into anything.

[*mipadi*]

I don't see anything wrong with it—but always do only what you are comfortable with. If you are fine with it, then don't worry about what other people say you should do.

[*jooleeah*]

^yep.

Be glad that you and your boyfriend both agree on this situation =) in a lot of cases, some people want to go faster than you might want them too, you know what i mean? eheh...

[random] i see that you like spirited away. ME TOOOOO. ilove it. hahah. cute avatars btw.[/random]

[Rachel]

okay, that works... but we're going back to the place where it happened tonight. I just have to hold myself back. I think I can.

thanks for everyone's help. It justs makes it easier to talk to people and be comforted.

Mmmkay, glad everyone helped. Now, does this need to be open?