I've Been Putting it off..., Some advice I know that will be simple but I need help |
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 Mar 22 2006, 08:03 PM
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#1
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victim of myspace.com  Group: Member Posts: 395 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,435  |
Yes, little immature me.
I need some advice on something really little, but I have no idea how to say it. And no, its not asking anybody out if that's what you're thinking. Yesterday this guy ((One of my very good friends)) was being a jerk, and today he gave me a note that says this: Dear Sierra, I'm sorry about what I said, and I'll never do anything like it again. I feel terrible for treating you that way, you're a very good friend to me. From now on I will be different, and I am terribly sorry. Gosh, that sounds pathetic for some reason. He's really sweet, but I don't know if I should forgive him or not, and if so I don't know what to say. He's just like a regular guy, when its just you two he is probably the sweetest thing in the world, but when he's around his friends he is such a jerk. I don't know if I should forgive him, I have a big feeling he will do something like that again, or is it just me not being open enough to forgive people? UGH, please help! |
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Mar 22 2006, 08:17 PM
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#2
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 Senior Member Group: Member Posts: 628 Joined: Feb 2005 Member No: 98,376 |
seems like he's acting like a fake. what about you could forgive, but NOT forget, eh? say that you'll forgive him, since you are good friends. but it'll take time to earn your trust back due to his behavior.
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| *mipadi* |
Mar 22 2006, 09:33 PM
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#3
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Guest |
Thing about people, especially guys, is that sometimes they do stupid things and need to be set straight.
 If he's a friend, then he's probably deserving of your forgiveness, unless what he did was really, really bad. But don't just let him off easy; tell him what you told us. Point out to him that he can be a real jerk when he's around his friends, and you don't want to put up with it anymore. Maybe he doesn't realize how much of a jerk he's being. Sometimes people need things pointed out to them in the most blunt of ways. |
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Mar 24 2006, 12:04 AM
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#4
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 The Bone Collector Group: Member Posts: 2,860 Joined: Aug 2004 Member No: 44,162 |
Forget that bastard. That's such bull.
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Mar 24 2006, 07:28 AM
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#5
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 ][»hottiebheibi«][ Group: Member Posts: 44 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 220,763 |
i agree to what they all said....
ask him why he did "that" thing to you... if his reason/s are acceptable then forgive (forgive but not forget) if not than make him pay... make him realize that what he did is totally wrong and he should do something to earn your trust back again... |
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Mar 24 2006, 09:15 AM
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#6
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 × Dead as Dillinger. ♥ Group: Member Posts: 1,527 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 384,615 |
He does sound sincere.
Tell him that you'll forgive him on the condition that he'll act a little differently towards you when he's with his guy friends. Get straight to the point, tell him that you don't care for when he's being cocky {Well, don't use that word; I can't think of a nicer one right now.} just to show off. |
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Mar 24 2006, 03:14 PM
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#7
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 i've never wanted anything rationale. Group: Staff Alumni Posts: 8,449 Joined: May 2004 Member No: 19,045 |
No matter how old you are, boys will always be boys around their friends. They just feel the need to show off and be douches.
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Mar 25 2006, 02:53 AM
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#8
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 You shall know us by the trail of dead. Group: Member Posts: 21 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 388,208 |
Well, it sounds like his heart is in the right place. Sit down, talk to him. Explain how you're feeling...
it sounds like he's acting different in front of his friends. If that's the case, tell him. He's caving to peer pressure, and that's normal. He does sound like a decent guy, you just need to level with him. A simple conversation can save a friendship... |
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Mar 25 2006, 02:38 PM
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#9
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 banangst ♥ Group: Member Posts: 727 Joined: Sep 2005 Member No: 237,399 |
QUOTE(Rachel is love @ Mar 24 2006, 12:14 PM)  No matter how old you are, boys will always be boys around their friends. They just feel the need to show off and be douches. Exactly, there are tons of guys like this in my school, they're nice, sincere people, but around boys they just do things without thinking to impress their friends. |
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Mar 25 2006, 05:54 PM
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#10
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 Hello There. Group: Member Posts: 1,572 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 88,673 |
you should forgive him.
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| *digital.fragrance* |
Mar 25 2006, 06:01 PM
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#11
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Guest |
A good thing to remember is to always forgive and forget - holding grudges is not cool.
The key thing you need to evaluate for yourself is whether or not you think he deserves a second chance. (I think he does) At any rate, you tell him how you feel... communication is always important! If you don't think you should give him a second chance, forgive him anyway and just don't hang around him all of the time. You don't want to be known in his circle fo friends as the B*tch... but more than that, it's about principle. Forgiveness is the first step toward healing. Holding it against him won't accomplish anything postive. Sincere? I think so - why would a guy take the time to write a note like that to a friend? Obviously, he cares about you're opinion and he means what he said... it bothered him an awful lot. Since he cares about your opinion, tell him how you feel (I know I'm redundant). There is a difference between forgiveness with a second chance and forgiveness with a little distance. Choose one, and remember that forgiveness is a key subject for life's happiness. Hope that helped! |
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Mar 25 2006, 06:33 PM
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#12
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 Senior Member Group: Posts: 8,274 Joined: Mar 2004 Member No: 8,001 |
It's natural for the guys to act different between two genders, even if it's just a little. Or ... it's just that male are able to treat girl better due to the fact that girl treat guys nicer than his guyfriend.
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Mar 25 2006, 09:05 PM
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#13
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Syar Group: Member Posts: 23 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 388,958 |
Well, many people are in that situation. They act differently when they are around their friends, mainly because their friends know about it. He can be talking sh*t about you to them, but you won't know. I would just forgive and forget, and if he does it again, then remind him of this situation.
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Mar 27 2006, 06:33 PM
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#14
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victim of myspace.com Group: Member Posts: 395 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,435 |
you know what i just found out?
my history teacher saw what happened and MADE him write the letter. jackass. |
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Mar 27 2006, 06:45 PM
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#15
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 oanh is awesome *nods* Group: Member Posts: 470 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 190,637 |
^ =o
wow, thats lame. If he was forced to write that letter, then ignore him. Ignore him till he feels really sorry. Guys and their stupid egos, I hate people like this. |
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| *Zatanna* |
Mar 27 2006, 07:01 PM
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#16
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QUOTE(Rachel is love @ Mar 24 2006, 12:14 PM) No matter how old you are, boys will always be boys around their friends. They just feel the need to show off and be douches.  It's true though - even at 30.  It seems like a sweet note though. Give him ONE 'get out of jail free card.' If he does it again, bid adieu and move on.
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Mar 29 2006, 12:19 PM
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#17
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 Member Group: Member Posts: 27 Joined: Feb 2006 Member No: 375,468 |
tell him like it is. he seems sincerely sorry.. but, give him your opinions about him being a jerk. don't take his crap. tell him he's being a jerk to you around his friends and you don't appreciate it. he should brighten up a bit to you when he's around his friends. if not, he truely is a jerk and doesn't deserve your friendship.
QUOTE you know what i just found out? my history teacher saw what happened and MADE him write the letter. jackass. edit:// i don't think he deserves your friendship if a teacher MADE him do it  he does sound like a jackass |
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Mar 29 2006, 05:38 PM
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#18
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victim of myspace.com Group: Member Posts: 395 Joined: Mar 2006 Member No: 386,435 |
^^ Read this:
QUOTE you know what i just found out?
my history teacher saw what happened and MADE him write the letter. jackass. |
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| *My Cinderella.* |
Mar 29 2006, 07:16 PM
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#19
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QUOTE(Ice Cream 4 U @ Mar 27 2006, 6:33 PM) you know what i just found out? ^ He sounds like a real jerk. my history teacher saw what happened and MADE him write the letter. jackass.  If you're willing to continue to be friends with him then I guess you should try telling him what you told us. Tell him how it makes you feel when he acts like a prick in front of his friends. In my opinion, this guys not worth your time. It's really up to you though. |
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