he'll be gone., forever Options

[islandkiss]

I've been dreading this saturday; Since it's going to be the day where we're going to take my grandfather off life support. I guess I should start off by telling you why we came to this challenging and confounding decision. Well, after living with alzheimer's and athsma, our family recently discovered an ambigious bump on the side of his neck which looked swollen but we never would have guessed that it would have turned out to be cancer. It seemed as if each day passed, he grew weaker, and his tumor was growing rapidly and more fatal.

He's unable to open his, once gentle and promising eyes. i'm sure i'll miss them

Because of this illness, he is now unable to eat by himself and he's unable to breathe by himself so he cannot live without the assistance of life support (refers to a set of therapies needed to "preserve" one's body/life".) The reason why we chose to take him off of life support is not because we're "cruel" or "cold"; it's because we know he's suffering but we still don't feel right about it. His cancer is irreversible and it's ebbing away at his life every second; I accompanied my mother yesterday to go see him, we didn't stay for long because I couldn't look at him; he just looked so helpless. I stood there crying, Ashamed. Guilty. Angry. well, I just felt like sharing this with you guys. I just don't know what to do anymore. My grandfather and my grandmother had been helping my parents raise my sister and I and when he dies, i'll just lose apart of myself. i've never lost anyone before; I guess I need your support. <3