Createblog Diary, V.7 Options

[*lolita kitty*]

dear cb diary,

Interesting day today. I told everyone who i liked, hahahaha/ They told me we would make such a cute couple. etcetcetc. They also told me that i had a "shot" with him. Not that that helps, but it did make me happier. Eeeeee! I'm all giggly now.

Betty and Lorena are ina huge fight right now. I don't even hang out with them, but its all over the school. Basically, lorena is the ghetto mexican chick that will kick anyones ass that talks shit, and betty is this sweet innocent little white girl who messed with the wrong group. So betty talked shit, as did Lorena... yadayada... and here we are.
So then betty was in tears at lunch and her friends took her to the office, and lorena's group was threatening to kick her ass. It was alot of shit. But whatever, at least i got some amusement out of it.

We did our play's in language arts today. funfunfun. Our group did good. I mnade the class laugh, horray.

Courtney's coming over tommorow. woohoo!
later.
casse.

[BrokenDream]

dear Createblog diary,

Guess who it is? Uh, yeah, it's Melissa. I have been neglecting createblog. I hate school. I hate rumors. I just hate it all. That's the reason why I haven't been on. I bet everyone forgot me. Well...I am not sure about that, I have been gone for 3 days? Exams are coming up - ugh. And, school is just hectic.

I feel like everyone doesn't like me anymore. This happens alot. At school and even on the internet. The reason I came back is to say I am leaving for awhile. I feel unloved and people think that I am very young they think I can't do anything. Even on createblog, they think that.

I am leaving for awhile. Maybe a few weeks.

love,
Melissa

[me1issaaaa]

Dear CB diary,

I'll get to see him in seven days. I'm so excited, but at the same time, I don't really know. I'm just so drained - school is just about to drive me mad. I really, really need his touch again; it's been so long. I miss the way his hair curls in his sideburns. I miss the little bridge on his nose. I miss that gigantic scar on his chin. I miss his arms wrapped around mine, our hands intertwined and laced together.

While it seems as if that's all I need, sometimes I just don't know. I know I could never need or desire anything he couldn't give me, because all I need is him, but I'm not so sure about his feelings and it kills me.

Last week he lied and said he was going to sleep, but he went with his friends to his ex-girlfriend's party. The next day he told me and I bawled. He ended up crying too because he felt guilty. Then, not even 24 hours later, he lied about what he's done with other girls. 11 months and I've been lied to the whole time.

I should look at his perspective - he was trying to protect me from getting hurt, right?






Bottom line is... I overthink and overreact and I cry way, way too much. I'm pretty sure I'm going crazy because I just miss him so much.



I will be alright, won't I?

[Teesa]

^Of course you'll be alright hon. I hope you're feeling a little better.

Dear CB Diary,

Today was fun. Lauren and I got to leave French a little early to head down to Laredo Middle School and talk to their eighth graders about the IB program. Aww, they're so little! Haha, I was first scared to talk in the mic, but I felt comfortable up there after a couple seconds. After that, I had a counseling appointment which went very well since I got my questions answered :D And she told me that she wants to keep both my college essays for references later. I was so happy.

Then, I turned in my first college application!! To Colorado State University. Let me tell you, it felt really liberating. Wowww. I loved it. The College Career Center was seriously mayhem when I went. It's so awesome to see all my friends so grown up. Cool.

After school, a bunch of us went to the mall and took pictures in the Christmas store for our greeting cards! It was fun. Then, I grabbed some Chinese food and was dropped off at home. My brother was there! He officially has started winter break. Awesome. I watched the Nuggets game with him--which they won!!--and the Avs game--they won, too!! It was awesome!!

After the game, I went online and submitted two more college apps. It feels good. But I have a lot of work to do this weekend. UGH.

--Teesa

[ichiban]

dear cb diary,
oh geeeeez i hope he doesnt like me...aaargh. grr.

This year is the worst..

[*Tainted Euphoria*]

Dear cB diary,

I truly feel like I'm digging a hole, here, and it's one I can't find my way out of.

[mzbbc]

dear cB diary,

i don't know what to do. i feel like i have two options and whatever i choose i will end up unhappy in some way, and happy in the way i wouldn't be if i chose something else.


i just don't know.


Maia
xoxo

[*lolita kitty*]

Dear cb diary,

COURTNEY IS OVERRRRRR.
hooray! *dancedancedance*
She is reading this as i speak. I just did a blend of her, and one for jenny and her g-crew... or whatever she calls it.
patricia and i talked on the phone again today.
I'm really bored. My clothes are drying.
Fun, huh? We're gonna take some pictures afterwards.

I WANNA GO TO JAMBA JUICE.
- cassie

[sense.n.style]

dear cb diary...

i feel so lazy right now... gotta do something before io freak...

[*jooleeah*]

Dear cB diary,
I'm tired...

and I miss Taiwan.

[pbear]

dear cBdiary,

i wish we were friends - he and i. instead, he's going to be friends with my sister, who couldn't care less.

[*lolita kitty*]

dear cb diary,
heee aaassskkkeeeddd me oooouuuutt!!!
(and I said yes)

[*stephinika*]

^^
aw cassie, congrats!


dear cb diary,

parents suck. a lot. they control my life and don't treat me my age and i hate it. its bullshit. but whatever.
i love him. he makes me so happy...i just wish that both of our parents weren't so overbearing. sigh. ah well. in due time i guess...
school sucks. way too stressful, and i still haven't started that term paper. ugh. i need my vacation. badly.

[*jooleeah*]

dear cb diary,
i hate my f**king brother.
he's getting kicked out tomorrow.
i hope he does himself well. f**ker.

[*Weird addiction*]

Dear cB diary...
It's always my fault! I'm f**king tired of it. He's TOO jealous, he thinks about my ex more than he thinks about me. I f**king love him, but i have my doubts...i'm going insane.

Should i continue loving him, even though many people don't want me to? He's he the right one for me?

I'm f**king screwed.

[*lolita kitty*]

dear cb diary,
omg omg omg i hate them all. my sister never feeds her hamster, ever. and guess what? it died today. she didn't even care. i started to cry. The poor thing was on her back. I mean she neverrrrrr fed it or anything. I feel so bad for it. And then i told her this, and she started to cry,
Of course dad felt bad for her and said "oh come here baaaaby its okay don't listen to her blah blah blah blah"
I hate them. she let her f**king hamster die and I get in trouble for telling hr she never f**king fed the poor thing in the first place.
At least my hamster is alive. i FEED it. -smiles-

I love Jacob. We had a fun day. He hugged me like 5 times. We kept smiling at eachother. We talk on myspace like 494208 hours a day

homelife still sucks though. bye.
- cassie

[KELLYYY]

^ CASSIE. WHOAAA. You have a lover.

dear cb diary,

i'm supposed to be sleeping right now. -shrug-

i like him. why? cause he's funny and hot. he's such a dork.

- kelly

[*jooleeah*]

dear cb diary,
f**king school. f**king family. f**king friends.

f**k. i hate this. i am SO angry. i hate f**king life.

[Nicolatofu]

^

cb diary:
Finals are alll this week. Today was a good day though. I got a 103 on my geometry test [highest in class thanks very much ) and the two worst days of the week are over! Now if I can make it through finals I'll feel even better. I have so much to do before she gets here on Sunday. I don't know how it will all fit in

[mzbbc]

dear cB diary,

i know what i want to do. so that's done.

but i hate all this other shit. why can't things just work out by themselves? why do i have to do something. this sucks. i want a fairy godmother. lmao

Maia
xoxo

[silver-rain]

Dear CB Diary,
Everyone I know is getting into college, and I'm feeling left behind. It's really disheartening... Yeah, I'm happy for them, but I'm also really disappointed in myself. Sigh, there are so many "what ifs" but there's nothing I can do... just focus on the future...

[*lolita kitty*]

hahahah Kelly, yes.

dear cb diary,
today was fun. very fun. Patricia and i went to borders and jamba jiuice. Actuslly, we walked. Our dad's picked us up and the excact same time. Haha.
I have to go to the dentest tommorow. dammit.
Jacooooooooooob. He is so cute. We sat together at lunch and he kept meking this dorky laugh. But I thought it was so adorable. And then we walked to science together (we both have science after lunch) and hugged. Total huge from him today: 3
I hate this stinking ballett final shit. daaaaaamn.

[mzbbc]

dear cB diary,

omGOD. i changed my mind. i still don't know what i'm gonna do. it's so confusing right now. shiiiiiiiet i need help.

Maia
xoxo

[*lolita kitty*]

dear cb diary,

lorena and stevie, those f**king bitches. they're starting rumors that I'm only going out with him because I want a boyfriend. They won't stop saying shit. They made me cry today. They ruined my f**king day. Thanks, guys.

- cassie

[*danielle_x3*]

in "love"

When you find love, you'd do anything just to keep them forever, wouldn't you? But then again, at our teenage years, serious relationships are not allowed because we are too young. But still you fall in 'love'. Not being aware of the drama that comes along with relationships, you fall to your knees, crying, the day your love decides to walk out the door. Your heart breaks into pieces and your whole world seems to fall apart.

*But then you realize that it's just a phase.

The wound in your heart begins to heal. Finally, you feel like you can breathe again. You then start to be friends with your past love because you realize that being friends is better than being nothing. Right?

So you're friends. Everything's cool. Hanging out one day with a group of people, your ex-love decides to play that one song that you two always played when you were together. You freeze for a moment. To save yourself from breaking down & reminiscing, you politely ask to not play the song.. But still, he continues to play it and you have no choice but to sit and listen. Now memories start rushing back. But you take a deep breath, and you pull yourself together. You say to yourself, "It's nothing."

Days pass and you happen to see your him again. You notice the clothes that he is wearing. You think to yourself, why is that outfit so familiar? Then you realize. It's the outfit that you bought as a present when you two were together. That's when you break.

Before that time, you meet a new friend, a girl. You spend some time together, and share a couple laughter. You bond and share secrets, feelings, etc. You enjoy your new friend's company and you realize that you want to keep that friendship alive. But then truth comes out. This new friend of yours is messing with your love. This new friend lied to your face when the words, "Nothing will happen between me and your love" came out of your new friend's mouth. Loyalty, honesty, & trust was what you gave your new friend. But in return, you get a needle piercing through your heart. You are left speechless.

Even though it was the past, something still hurts. Why can't I FULLY get over him. Help me to be less selfish. I know there's more important things in life. I rarely open up like this. I'm just vulnerable right now.