I am sorry, Poem |
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 Aug 30 2005, 06:05 AM
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#1
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 WarPath Leader.  Group: Member Posts: 668 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 216,721  |
-= I am sorry =-
I am sorry for all that I am I am sorry for being nice I am sorry for being understanding I am sorry for being mysterious I am sorry for being smart I am sorry for being pretty I am sorry for being there for you I am sorry for being soft in my ways I am sorry for having a gentle heart I am sorry for letting you fall I am sorry for not being able to stop it I am sorry for not being stronger I am sorry for not being able to forcible hurt you ... damned ... wicked ... doomed ... unforgiven ... evil ... life ? I am sorry... |
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Aug 31 2005, 09:18 AM
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#2
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 Brown hand smash Group: Member Posts: 654 Joined: Nov 2004 Member No: 60,582 |
cool!
l love it good job! |
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Sep 1 2005, 08:44 PM
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#3
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WarPath Leader. Group: Member Posts: 668 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 216,721 |
Yay,thanx im glad you like`it ;-)
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Sep 4 2005, 10:32 PM
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#4
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 Member Group: Member Posts: 13 Joined: Sep 2005 Member No: 225,748 |
yea itz good
 the title kinda made me notice tho becuz i hav a poem with a title jux like tat  if u want to read it jux ask, itz not as good as urz tho 
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Sep 6 2005, 10:09 PM
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#5
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 What up, dawg? Group: Member Posts: 235 Joined: Jun 2004 Member No: 19,480 |
It touches me somehow. It's beautiful!
Rin-chan |
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Sep 7 2005, 07:50 PM
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#6
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 My name's Katt. Nice to meet you! Group: Member Posts: 3,826 Joined: Jan 2005 Member No: 93,674 |
Hm. It's okay. The repitition is a nice touch, but the first few lines are slightly boring and conceited.
'I am sorry for not being able to forcible hurt you' That line makes no sense. I tihnk this needs a lot of revising. |
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| *torngemini* |
Sep 10 2005, 01:09 AM
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#7
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Guest |
haha straight to the point ... nice
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Sep 11 2005, 12:36 PM
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#8
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WarPath Leader. Group: Member Posts: 668 Joined: Aug 2005 Member No: 216,721 |
QUOTE(AkaRyux @ Sep 8 2005, 2:50 AM) Hm. It's okay. The repitition is a nice touch, but the first few lines are slightly boring and conceited. 'I am sorry for not being able to forcible hurt you' That line makes no sense. I tihnk this needs a lot of revising.  No,lol since its a poem, you need not to read 1by one and think about each of that phrases because all are linked and they do have their own sense, its something more then just poetry,if you dont have any ideea better not talk. |
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