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Messing my head, is she playing me or what?
JessBur1981
post Aug 4 2005, 04:38 PM
Post #26


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You don't seem to understand, I can't be even a freind to her now, her b/f won't allow any sort of contact with me. He is very jealous of me, because he knows how much better I am for her than him. Like I said before if i tried to talk to her or even ride by her house to check up on her I would jeapordize her safety.
 
Hiphop d[-_-]b
post Aug 4 2005, 04:50 PM
Post #27


Bay Area YadadaDiiiig.
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listen to chii, and no matter what get her out of that abusive relationship.
 
JessBur1981
post Aug 4 2005, 04:58 PM
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So what you're saying is risk her getting beat up and go after her anyway and get her away from the b/f that is hitting her and maybe also risk HER BEING STUBBORN and not coming with me or leaving and getting beat up? Then it will be on my head. I damn sure don't want to feel guilty about getting the woman I am in love with beaten up.
 
baby-girl2987
post Aug 4 2005, 10:03 PM
Post #29


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QUOTE(x3chrissyx3 @ Aug 3 2005, 7:02 PM)
Well, obviously she must care about the other guy a lot, or perhaps she's just afraid. And I hate to say it, but maybe you're just "convienient" at the time, you know? I don't think she's purposely trying to make it that way...so I don't think she's TRYING to mess with your head.

I think you should just talk to her in any case, like, about how she feels about him and things like that
*



^ what they said and i also just think she is afraid. help her to not be afraid. stand up for her if u have to. if u love her and care like u say.
 
CrazayChristian
post Aug 4 2005, 10:18 PM
Post #30


The Texan
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Let me fill you in on what's goin on here:

She's attracted to him more than you bro.

I'm sorry to say it, but she is basically thinking:

"Man I really like him, but I need to heal before I'm with him, maybe I can get someone to help me"*goes to you*
"Ok, I think I'm ready"*Goes back*
"Help!"*you*

She might not notice it, but she's using you.

When A woman feels something romantic she feels one of 2 things:

1.Lover

2.Provider

That guy is the lover you are the provider. That's why she "Loves you both" and she is as you say "A fool".

She's a fool because this guy does all the right things at the right time, and BAM she is attracted to him. She can't help it, some guys are just assholes like that, and they know what to do to be able to be abusive.

Think of the basis of human thinking:

To survive
and
To Procreate

Now, think of what she's thinking "I need him (you) to survive, and get through this, but I need him(him) to get the feelings I want(I.E. Lustful attractive evolutionary features)"

So, In other words, Provider is looks higher than Lover.

WHAT SHOULD YOU DO?

Help her through it, but don't develop feelings for her any further. She's stuck on this guy, and it's basically his choice on wether or not he wants her. Help her through it, be a friend, but don't make feelings in you grow, or you'll just screw yourself.


Edit: CONTACT

If she has a screen name, do that.

Phone, do that.

As long as she doesn't tell him, and he doesn't see you with her, it's all good. He can't do anything about what he doesn't know about. What an ass, when she breaks up with him, make sure it stays that way.

(Oh and if she does the whole "Sex for every Relationship" Deal, this would tap into the Provider/Lover deal. Does this mean you scared her away by waiting? Not at all, it just backs this up)
 
JessBur1981
post Aug 9 2005, 03:58 PM
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I really want to curse now. Only because it makes sense. Now how am I supposed to have feelings for her knowing that just used me? I guess since no love grew in her heart I will just have to be content with the fact that it grew in mine. Christian has this ever happened to you? Seems you know a lot about a situation that hasn't been totally revealed.

Guess what I need to do is leave her alone before I get hurt anymore. I should have left well enough alone when I had the chance but for some reason I let my kindness cause blindness. Thanks for the tip.
 
JessBur1981
post Aug 9 2005, 03:59 PM
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This was a double post edit. sorry
 
Ilaem
post Aug 9 2005, 05:37 PM
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Yeah
Boys who abuse there GFs are losers
LOSERS
LOSERS
LOSERS

Heh, i think i made my point

*winks*
 
iiTsDAYNA
post Aug 9 2005, 09:39 PM
Post #34


My peanut.
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Tell her to stop trippin over this guy. She needs to realize that if hes hurting her she needs to step back and leave him.
 
JessBur1981
post Aug 10 2005, 07:14 PM
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Well heres the 411 on the situation thus far. I met someone else. I decided I liked being with her more because
1)She doesn't play head games
2)Is very attractive
3)Presents herself better
4)Lots more reasons

I decided that if she wants to be in an abusive relationship then thats fine. ALL the shit she's done to me has made me lose all positive feelings for her...She is on her own now. She made the decision to leave so now its her turn to play the game.
 

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